Post # 32
It feels weird having the ring sitting around in our house. it’s something so intimate and so “meaningful” at one time that it feels wrong having it around my husband. Even if it is out of sight. I think I would be upset if he hung onto a ring that he once gave an ex.
Those of you who sold your rings, did it matter to your current Fiance what you did with them? Would they have been upset if you kept it?
It’s nice to hear that you sold yours and you don’t regret it. My biggest worry is that I will regret it later on and by then I won’t be able to do anything about it.
I totally agree about the bad omen in rings from previous engagements. That is partly why I didn’t have it set in pendant before. Like a ball and chain around my neck come to think of it.
That is really sweet. “That her parents once loved each other”. It’s so touching to read that and you’ve just made it that much harder for me to sell it, even though I want nothing to do with my ex.
Post # 33
On one hand I say sell it because it does hold bad memories.
On the other hand, I can definitely see this coming back to bite you with your son. He may not be really aware of it now, but in the future if it comes up it might spur up an argument. Unless you desperately need the money-I would hang on to it for a while.
If you didn’t have a child together, I would 100% say sell it.
My mom has been married 3x. I just found out that she still has the cake cutter from when her & my dad got marriend and I am SO happy that I get to use it for my wedding. My parents got together when my mom was 13, she had me at 18, got married at 22, divorced at 24. Just because I am a product of that love, I want anything I can have from during that time.
I am just afraid your son may have the same feelings I do one day (I was 6 when my parents broke up). But my sister was 4 when they broke up and she didn’t want to use the cake cutter for her wedding because our parents didn’t last. So it can go either way.
I say hold on to it for now. If an emergency comes up and you need the money, I say sell it. But keep it until your son is old enough to talk about it.
Post # 34
Sell it and put the money directly into something for your son. Since it came from his father and it means nothing to you, it seems like that would be the right thing to do. Put it in a college fund or pay for a summer camp for him or do something just for him with the money.
Post # 35
What I was thinking. It’s stil from the relationship his parents had. I’d say hold onto it until he’s older and give it to him. If he decided to give it to his fiancee, great. If he decides to sell it, that’s fine too.
I don’t believe so much in the diamond curse here. This relationship still produced him, so it wasn’t a complete failure. My grandparents divorced, but her engagement ring is still a cherished family heirloom. And my parents are divorced, but I’d still wear her wedding ring if it were my style.
ETA: I still have my engagement ring from my ex. It’s a sapphire ring that I love and I still wear it (it doesn’t look like an engagement ring, though). My fiance knows what it is but doesn’t care that I wear it.
Post # 36
Sell it and invest the money into and IRA or some other form of savings for your son for college.
Post # 37
@lilsweetie: Why not just give it back to your ex? When my first engagement ended I gave the ring back to him.
Post # 39
I wouldn’t give it back to him right now because we are in the middle of a custody battle (>3 yrs of court proceeding) so the last thing I want to do is fund his court case, lol.
Post # 40
I would definitely sell it. Even though you’d only get $315, that’s $315 of profit for you considering you didn’t buy it, and it’s out of your hair.
Post # 41
I went through a similar situation with a promise ring from an ex. I hung on to that ring for 7 years and I finally sold it last year. It felt good to just get rid of the old thing. So I vote sell it.
Post # 42
I personally would sell it, I agree with PPs about using the money for something for your son
Post # 43
opt 5 : he bought the ring, then return it back to your ex…
otherwise, save it for your son..
Post # 44
I thought it was if giver breaks it off, the recipient keeps it, and if the recipient breaks it off, the giver gets it back?
I voted sell.
Post # 45
Oh heavens, I would sell it, like yesterday. But then I think anything that came from a toxic ex has “cooties.”
I would take the money and donate it to charity so that there would be NOTHING left of it in my life.
Post # 46
My Fiance said ultimately it was my ring and I could do what I wanted with it, but it did make him uncomfortable knowing I still had it. I had originally considered having the diamonds made into a pendant, or giving it to my future children, but then I asked myself why would I want to give them a piece of jewelery that was given to me by a man who treated me poorly and lied about the very vows the ring stood for?