(Closed) What to do with engagement ring from ex? Sell or keep? HELP!

posted 8 years ago in Rings
  • poll: What would you do with an old e-ring from your ex?

    Sell it for 1/3 of the original price

    Spend $200-300 to have it reset as a pendant

    Keep it to give to my son in the future

    Keep it stashed and forget about it for now

  • Post # 47
    Member
    1595 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    View original reply
    @fishbone:  I am pretty sure that you are only obligated to return the ring during the engagement period (depending on the state)…once you are actually married it is treated the same as any other personal belongings the couple shared.

    Post # 48
    Member
    5427 posts
    Bee Keeper

    I threw mine out the window while going down a highway, I was the passenger… it’s  probably still in that ditch! And that was 22 years ago. I wonder per chance if someone stopped at that spot to go for a whiz and found it? LOL

    Post # 49
    Member
    7976 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2013 - UK

    Although your ex said that you could keep it, I feel that a ring is given in contemplation of marriage. If you no longer wish to get married, you should return it to your ex (by courier… and get a receipt!). If you do not wish to do it now, as you are in the middle of a court case, then I would stash it somewhere until you are on better terms, and then return it with a polite note and perhaps a bottle of wine or something. You know, explain that you feel the ring is his by right and that you would like to remain on friendly terms etc etc. I do think that it should ultimately go back to him, however…

    Post # 50
    Member
    878 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Give it back, it can be his burden.

    I had recieved a ring from 2 of my previous exs.  Not engagememtn rings, they were gifts.  I gave them back regardless.

    Post # 51
    Member
    4755 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    keep the ring for your son. If he doesn’t want to use it in the future then he can sell it and use whatever money he gets for it to put towards another ring or item.

    Post # 52
    Member
    4652 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    Keep it for your son. He deserves to have the chance to have the ring if wants it in the future! 

    Post # 53
    Member
    3226 posts
    Sugar bee

    I went through this. We had no children so it was easy for me to sell especially because I paid for it myself. I absolutely loved it but it held bad memories for me. It had a crack in the diamond also so there was not much I could do with it and honestly I felt no desire to hold onto it once I re-married. 

    Post # 54
    Member
    550 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I sold my old e-ring and paid off some bills.  I still have the two wedding bands and I want to sell those as well.  I hope to get a decent amount because they’re two eternity bands set in 18k gold.

    I would sell it and either put it in a college fund for your son, pay for his daycare or something related to him.

    Post # 55
    Member
    995 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    @lilsweetie:  you should save the ring for your son, just because you don’t have good memories of your relationship doesn’t mean that your son won’t feel differently. Your ex will always be his father–and I see nothing wrong with him using it as a promise ring in the future.

    I’m a little hazy as to why you want to sell it…..if you don’t want it maybe your ex wants it? Idk no matter how messy the breakup was your son is the product of that relationship and I would think that the ring would be important to me

    My grandmother is pawning her mother’s engagement ring and I’m quite upset with her about it. Her parents fought like cats and dogs for decades but never divorced–but she says there are no happy memories attached to the ring so she doesn’t think that anyone in the family should have it. I say BS, then why didn’t she sell it herself? Point being, there is no such thing as a perfect relationship, and just because it ended doesn’t mean that all trace of it should be erased–it’s a part of you, and your son is the product of it

    Post # 56
    Member
    44 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    @lilsweetie:  I would actually keep it and make earrings out of it; buy another loose stone of the same grade on Blue Nile (only about $400 bucks) and get the two stones set as diamond studs. Classic jewelry you’ll wear forever. 

    Or…just sell it. 

    Post # 57
    Member
    1734 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    My fiance was in this situation. He had the ring from his previous engagement. (She was cheating on him and when he found out he demanded the ring back.) He wasn’t sure what to do with it, but he ultimately decided to sell it. It just didn’t seem right to keep it when it was associated with such a negative time in his life.

    Post # 58
    Member
    2457 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 2010

    Save it for your son. My father was a horrible man who my mother left when I was a baby. She kept her wedding ring and I inherrited it when she died and I cherrish it, even though the rel was terrible if they hadn’t done it there would have been no me. 

    Post # 59
    Member
    582 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    I was always under the impression that if you weren’t ever married you were legally required to return it. I know that if it was me I would feel awful selling it, I didn’t buy it, he did, so I would just give it back and let him do what he wants with it ie; give it to your so if he wanted it or sell it. 

    Post # 60
    Member
    3586 posts
    Sugar bee

    I don’t usually add my 2cents, but since I have a child now and I see the other side, I have to add it.LOL

    Save it for him. The relationship wasn’t the best, but if it wasn’t for that relationship, he wouldn’t exist.

    Post # 61
    Member
    204 posts
    Helper bee

    either sell it or if you have a few loose diamonds laying around i would get it re-made into a middle finger (haha) ring.

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