Post # 1
Member
532 posts
Busy bee
Okay bees, I need some advice..
My FH’s cousin is getting married Aug. 5. It’s a very upscale event, black tie mandatory with more than 300 guests attending. I’ve been invited due to our engagement, and the fact my FH is very close to this cousin. She is having everyone and anyone invited in a huge latino wedding.
What do I wear to a black tie mandatory? What’s the dress code for girls?
My FH and his mother have suggested I wear this black, A-line sheath gown I have from my best friend’s weddign last august. It’s black and white, pulls to one side with a tiny bit of beading and white: http://www.davidsbridal.com/Product_Two-Tone-Strapless-Satin-Ballgown-with-Side-Invert-F1286_Bridal-Party-Bridesmaids-Shop-By-Color in black.
I wore it last August and it was okay. A tiny bit hot – but any dress that length is bound to be. It has a bit of taffeta which gets scratchy around the knees, but not too badly.
I feel like that’s awfully formal to wear to a wedding, and its black. Who wears black to a wedding?
Yet, I don’t have any other real gowns.
What’s the dress code for a black tie wedding for females? Is it okay to wear black to a wedding?
Help – this is going to be the first social event with FH’s family where I’m his fiancee, not just his girlfriend. Plus, he’s using it to introduce me to distance family he sees once in a blue moon, but doesn’t necessarily plan on inviting to our wedding. Sorta a big deal.
Post # 3
Member
1944 posts
Buzzing bee
@dragonlover:
Actually black is acceptable to wear and many do nowadays, so that’s not an issue. 🙂 My only thing is if it is a summer wedding even black tie required I dont do black bc its too hot for me and I like color. To dress appropriate for black tie, women need to be in cocktail dresses or long dresses and guys in suits or tuxes. I went to The Limited for my cocktail dresses for a couple of black tie events; they have beautiful dresses that are appropriate for this.
Post # 4
Member
5494 posts
Bee Keeper
Yes I think that dress is definitely appropriate for Black Tie required events. I also think black is fine to wear to a wedding and notice that a lot of ladies wear black these days.
For black tie REQUIRED events men should be in tuxes and ladies in full length gowns.
Post # 5
Member
1041 posts
Bumble bee
I dont think its too formal but it does look kind of hot. For an August wedding i would do a cocktail dress, or a long dress in a lighter fabric. Its acceptable to wear black to a wedding. A cute black cocktail dress will be formal enough and you will be able to wear it to many other events. Plus you can dress it up or down with accessories.
Post # 6
Member
13099 posts
Honey Beekeeper
In my circle – black tie means tuxes for guys and long, floor-length gowns for women. Black is definitely fine though.
I disagree with the PP that said cocktail dresses and suits are fine. That is what I’ve seen worn to every semi-formal wedding I’ve ever attended and black tie is definitely fancier than semi-formal.
Post # 7
Member
1041 posts
Bumble bee
In my circle, for black tie mandatory a tux is usually called for but a dressy coctail dress can be appropriate. There is a difference between a cocktail dress you would wear to a semi formal event and a black tie event. I have been to many black tie charity events, balls and weddings and at each of them there have been women wearing cocktail dresses. Only the white tie events that i have been to required only floor length gowns.
A floor length gown would be the safest bet, but i wouldnt exclude a shorter dress. If you only own that long gown and your FH and Future Mother-In-Law think its acceptable then it should not be a problem.
Post # 8
Member
2550 posts
Sugar bee
Since its black tie, a floor length gown is appropiate. Since the dress you have is dressy, I suggest that you keep that as your backup. I would look for a dress made out of chiffon. And if possible a summery color. Check out local dept stores and consignment stores. There are a ton of options on the internet as well.
Post # 9
Member
1401 posts
Bumble bee
Yeah, I agree with squeak35 that you should maybe keep that dress as a backup… to me, it looks like a bridesmaid’s dress. With so many gorgeous formal gowns out there, I’d maybe just look at it as an opportunity to have some fun and get a pretty new gown!
Post # 10
Member
229 posts
Helper bee
In my circle, a cocktail dress would be appropriate for a black tie optional wedding, but black tie required means long dresses. I don’t think you’ll be overdressed in that dress at all 🙂
Post # 11
Member
2195 posts
Buzzing bee
@Miss Scarlet: I agree with this. Black tie Mandatory = Gown and Tux.
Post # 12
Member
633 posts
Busy bee
Strictly black tie means formal (not semi) so you would look out of place if you didn’t dress up. I’m guessing most women will be wearing floor length gowns, so you should probably find one too. I think the black is totally acceptable, but you could also opt for something with a pop of color. I would definitely wear a gown though.
Post # 13
Member
275 posts
Helper bee
These dresses are on sale! First two are from macys and the bottom two are from david’s bridal. All under $100.
I think the dress you have is fine, just giving you ideas 🙂
Post # 14
Member
532 posts
Busy bee
I just want to say –
Thank you everyone. I think I am going to be keeping that dress in mind for possible use, as it have the dress, necessary bra, shapewear and shoes to match.
I am probably going to hit up Macys, JC Penny and a few other stores to see if I can find a gown in a summer color I am comfortable in (Blue, teal, turquoise shades?) that would be cooler, more comfy.
Post # 15
Member
518 posts
Busy bee
I’m having a black tie wedding (the day after the one you’re going to, haha) so I’ve been getting a lot of questions from guests about it. I would have your Fiance check with his cousin to see if they are ok with guests wearing black. People tend to wear black to weddings that I’ve been to, but it’s an old school fashion don’t, so you should just make sure it will be ok for this particular wedding.
Generally, black tie for women can be a floor length gown or it can be a cocktail length dress. The key with a cocktail length dress is to either wear a really dressy one (beading, very fancy fabric, etc) and/or to really dress it up with fancy jewelry, shoes, and bag.
