What went wrong on your wedding day? What do you wish you did differently?

posted 2 months ago in Recaps
Post # 16
Member
2119 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

sunworshipbride :  

Elopement day: 

Hair did not turn out how I wanted and was flat within an hour.

Flowers were nothing like what I talked to the florist about

My hair took twice as long as planned to have done and I had 15 minutes to do my make up and get dressed before we had to meet our limo

I was stung by a bee on my wedding finger while taking photos

Celebration day:

Severe thunderstorm warning and tornado watch (we had a dinner cruise so not a good match)

Our event planner was not paying attention to times and we launched half an hour late

FIL was being a complete creep and hitting on my sister and the photographer

Stung by a bee on my forehead while taking photos

One of our guests drank too much and nearly got into a fist fight, he also lit up a joint on the dance floor (illegal in our state).

My best friend who flew in to come to the celebration had to leave early because her plus one was afraid of thunderstorms. 

Overall though, we still had a great wedding day and a great celebration. We didn’t plan to have a dance or anything, just the dinner cruise. But the venue had a live band that started right as our boat returned to shore. It was a great band too so most of our guests stayed and danced the night away! They also played a “first dance” song for DH and I which was really special and unexpected. If I could go back, I don’t think I would change a thing. We did what we wanted and it was wonderful despite the minor hiccups! 

Post # 18
Member
14003 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Minor details that no one noticed: There was a table next to us where we were saying our vows that we didnt need that shouldn’t have been there.  I didnt even notice at the time, but noticed when it was in my pictures.  Some decorative boxes got put around my cake that wans’t folded up right.

Major things that no one told me about:  My great aunt was in a car accident on the way to the venue (with another car on the way to the wedding) and found out the next day that she had broken a rib or two.  My grandmother left early the next morning cause she had to go home for a surgery. 

Major thing the day before: My mother woke up in severe pain and could barely walk.  She ended up in the ER and missed the rehersal dinner.  I had to go to Costco to pick up the flowers, and they gave me hard time cause it was my moms membership and she was the one that was going to go.  They found nothing really “wrong”, assumed a pinched nerve or something and she was able to go home the night and still made it to the wedding though, so that was a relief.

Post # 19
Member
2335 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2017 - Valleybrook Country Club

sunworshipbride :  I have no regrets, but a few things went wrong, besides the ouring rain when we were suposed to be outside for pictures and cockatil hour.

-girls were running late getting ready (my mom was 1st hair/mu appt and was 1/2 hour late!)

-ceremony was longer than expected and made us arrive for pictures at venue late which made cocktail late…

-most of my handmade table numbers broke (I made them out of wine corks and took hours but an employee dropped the box and they all snapped cry)

-DHs relative had hissy fit that he wasn’t involved in the ceremony and his wife threw a tantrum

-family pictures were rushed and in a tent instead of on golf course

-DH and I were limited in our pictures of just 2 of us due to rain situation

-DJ blew a speaker out, but had it fixed quickly

-My bustle was not sewn properly and I had to have my SIL mess with it to look decent

 

We had a lot of little things go wrong. No matter what something will not go as planned. I had prepared myself for it. I planned for 16 months and by the time the morning came I was prepared to not worry about any of that stuff and just focus on me and DH and us getting married! I did exactly that and was very relaxed. 

Even though it was pouring, I didn’t let that stop me… we took pics in the rain. My dad still drove me in his classic car without a top-I used an umbrella on the 3.5 mile drive. My hair was a mess because of it, but the hairstylist gave me a second do after the ceremony to put it all up.

Post # 20
Member
697 posts
Busy bee

DH was SUPER late bc of traffic. (But he’s late to everything so I planned for him to be late & had a ton of extra time in the schedule to account for about an hour- he was 2 hours though). Bc of this we were still doing our first look when people were arriving. So, some people saw me before the ceremony. 

We provided our own wine & beer without a bar tender (not something I’d recommend for most people but out of 65 guests only about 20 would be drinking moderately). But we forgot the wine opener!!! We had to improvise & push the first,s down into the bottle to drink. 

Our lighting gave us issues which made set up of the reception difficult. It took WAY longer to set up than planned for. 

 

Thats it. There was nothing that went wrong that I got bent out of shape over. At the end of the day, none of this mattered & I got to marry my best friend. It helped hear over and over from these boards that things would go wrong & so I expected it. And I kept my focus on the bigger picture which was our marriage, not the wedding!

Post # 21
Member
2445 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

My sister and I went to a salon to get our hair done.  We were both really happy with the outcome, but the stylist took an hour longer than she said she would.  It was fine, but we didn’t get to have the relaxing lunch I had wanted.  But we had enough time to eat at least!

I was also unhappy with some of our pictures.  There’s a wierd seam in my dress in the bust area.  I’m sure I’m the only one that notices it, but it still bugs me a lot.  I otherwise loved my dress though, so I’m not sure what I would have done differently….

Post # 22
Member
236 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

Everything was perfect! Except that the groomsman who collected all the ceremony *stuff* – including our marriage license, religious items that had been used in weddings in my family for generations, and a silver chalice my Mom bought when I was an infant for my future wedding ceremony – put it in the trunk of his rental car and returned the car the next morning. When we realized at about midday the day after our wedding, the rental car had already gone out to somebody else… the rental company could not get a hold of the driver for two weeks. But it all worked out! It was an older person in town on vacation who listed their home phone number as their contact (lol). She returned the car on time and everything was just sitting in the trunk.

Post # 23
Member
805 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

Our venue served a completely wrong dessert. We asked for a selection of 3 mini desserts – chocolate mousse, lemon meringue and strawberry cheesecake in order to have a variety of flavours/textures…what was served was 3 different kinds of fruit mousse. 

The sound system for our dance floor stopped working half way through the night so it killed the dancing time a bit early.

The weather was a big let down. Ok I know this can’t be helped, but we had stunning scenery outside the venue overlooking the mountains but we had gale force winds on the day. In a lot of our photographs we look very windswept and don’t have nice expressions on our faces.

Post # 24
Member
317 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

Almost everything went great at mine! There are only two things I would do differently.

1) I forgot to ask my photographer to get a couple portraits of me in my dress, which is a bummer because my dress was really special and cool and I don’t have any great head to toe photos of it.

2) I knew I was changing into flats later in the evening and I really wish I had just started with flats and hemmed the dress to be with flats. I was tripping all night and I only lasted in my heels until the end of the ceremony!

But really everything was pretty perfect and there’s very little I would have done differently.

Post # 25
Member
2511 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2008

My dress was tailored for my painfully high, 4″ heels. I took Advil prior to putting them on, but even then they got too painful so I kicked them off, leading to guests stepping on and tearing my dress on the dance floor. I’m still sad about my dress being ruined. If I could have a do-over I’d have said “Fuck it” and worn (and had my dress tailored to) sparkle Keds instead.

We had no DJ but we made a playlist from guest suggestions. Everyone could choose up to three songs (there were 27 adult guests). My narcissistic MIL who loves music changed the playlist to suit her tastes, and when DH’s two cousins insisted that you can’t dance to Bryan Ferry and tried to change it back, a fight erupted. The DOC broke it up but I was mortified. Definitely assign a playlist bouncer! 

I’m not sure if this was preventable but my dad, who is bipolar, went on a manic trip, arrived just in time to walk me down the aisle, interrupted the sermon, ruined all of the family formals with his crazy faces, gave a nonsense speech on bended knee that made everyone uncomfortable, and hit on all of my female friends. The DOC, bless her, tried to run interference and eventually cornered him and flirted with him the rest of the night so he’d be contained. Moral of the story, a DOC is worth it if you have crazy family!

Post # 26
Member
1848 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Small issues that didn’t really matter in the end:

We forgot to take the GOLD safety pins out of my train (they were there to mark the bustle apparently)

It was freakishly windy during my outdoor ceremony

People didn’t sit in the seats closest to the aisle so it looks kind of empty in the pictures

Lots of people that RSVPed with a +1 showed up alone, so the tables looked kind of empty

The one thing I would have changed:

The day-of coordinator for the event talked us into letting the guests start dinner while we were taking pictures, so when we got to the reception everyone was done eating. We sat down at our sweetheart table and immediately the guests started forming a line to talk to us, so not only did we not ever get a chance to eat but people started panicking that they wouldn’t get to talk to us if they didn’t line up. I would have rather us walked around from table to table while other people were eating.

Post # 27
Member
222 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

OMG. So many things went wrong for us. Ultimately they were all little details that I’m sure no one else saw so I just let everything go and enjoyed my day. I was very proud of myself for not letting it ruin my mood, in fact it got to the point that it was just humorous what else would happen.

1. Nail saga. The day before I was getting nails done at a salon MIL picked, it was a terrible Chinese mall one and the whole experience was awful. I wanted a light pink and white gradient/ombre nail. We had shown a picture beforehand and they said no problem. That day we showed the pic and the owner and one of the nail guys were arguing about it in Chinese. The guy clearly didn’t want to do it but I was ushered to sit down in front of him. What he did was awful. I kept asking him to file down to the shape I wanted a little more or if he could blend better and he started getting rougher and rougher with my hands, saying “why you too complicated?” and never did my cuticles. It was literally the worst nails I’ve ever seen, thick, lopsided, chunky, just hideous. He didn’t blend at all and just slathered glitter over the line between the pink and white. It was clear I wasn’t getting what I wanted so I just let it be and during my pedicure started debating how I would fix it at home. I asked for pink toes and they they just did glitter without listening to me, I was feeling too upset and defeated to even fight it by that point. When I was done with the pedi the girl clearly could tell how I didn’t like it and offered to fix it. She took me to her station and started grinding everything off and then painted my nails white. I asked her if she would blend the pink and she said yes she knew how to do it, and then just left white nails. I showed her the picture of what I wanted and she said that could only be done with powder. She finally just slapped glitter on the bottom of the nail. Her results where better than the previous but still nothing close to what I asked for and still the worst nails I’ve ever had done, messy edges, no cuticle care, not uniformly filed. By that point it was time for my bridal luncheon so there was nothing else that could be done so that was it. I tried to avoid any close up hand pictures though.

2. Chair covers. I didn’t even want chair covers but it was a detail SO wanted to I agreed even though I thought it was a waste of money. We had folding chairs and had ordered a few covers beforehand to make sure they fit perfect. We rented from online and they send a few days before for the event. When we started putting them on the day before none of them seemed to fit correctly, they were all baggy and lumpy. We checked the invoice and they had run out of folding style and sent the banquet style without ever notifying us. We called and they said they could rush ship the correct ones out for $260. Umm we have to pay more for your mistake!? We didn’t do it and in the end just used them but it made me mad we spent hundred of dollar on stupid covers and they didn’t even look right in my eyes, but again, sure no one noticed.

3. Morning of, it rained and they hadn’t properly covered the outdoor PA system so the venue owner was scrambling to set up a new one and called me out to check everything over. It all worked out but it was a bit of extra stress an hour before hair and makeup and photographer came.

4. Mimosas. Was supposed to have some with my girls while getting ready but it got forgotten in some chaos. 

5. Hair. I did a hair trial a few months ago and it took about an hour. The girl said now that she knew it would take 30-45 min. It ended up taking 1h15m. I had budgeted extra time but running over that much stressed me out. On top of that she put my headband in way back, more like a tiara. It had teeth so trying to pull it out to rearrange it was a mess. Originally only 1 of my bridesmaids wanted her hair done but then on the day of they all changed their mind and wanted it too so even with my extra time we started running late and had to rush our group pictures.

6. Hanger. My MIL ordered one of those custom hangers with my new name for my wedding dress. She ordered last minute and it didn’t arrive until that afternoon after I had put my dress on. 

7. Flowers. Were supposed to arrive at 11. While I was getting hair done at 12 I got a call they would be there at 4. Our wedding was at 6 but we were doing all our pictures beforehand at 2. In my bridesmaid goodie bags I had put fans in since it’s hot. We ended up using them for pictures. They were never meant for photos are were just cheap fans from the dollar store so we’ll see how tacky it ends up looking when I get photos back. As we were finishing up our bridal party photos the flowers arrived. They weren’t really what I had asked for and were really beat up already. Several of my lilies were crushed and had creases in the petals and one was split. The white roses were already browning around the edges and a couple of lillies didn’t have the pollen stems removed and so everything was stained orange and brown. During pictures SO’s flower started falling apart so we had to make another pin for him. 

8. With the flowers we had asked for a small arrangement for the alter table. What she brought was huge, and bigger than our whole table. While we were doing pictures my mom had to rework it so it would fit on our alter and that the candle and unity hour glass could even be seen.

9. The florist also threw in some pew bows without telling us. They looked fine but no one was made aware of them so no one understood who they were for and no one sat in the first 3 rows during the ceremony except our parents which looks a little odd.

10. Apparently the officiant never said now you can be seated so everyone was standing for a long time. Gradually people started sitting but some of the people in the front remained standing for a long time. I never noticed but my parents said something about it later.

11. We rented all of our stuff through our caterer, including glasses for the bar. The bar was aware of this but must have forgot and they were serving in plastic for the first hour before my mom realized and said something.

12. When our cannolis were delivered they told us they were missing a number on our card and not able to run it even though I had ask that it be run the week before. They came to me with the problem and I scrambled around for a minute trying to find my wallet before my dad just came over and wrote a check. 

13. Our bestman was very nervous and people couldn’t really hear his speech. He tried to end it with a toast but no one heard and so we never actually toasted. 

14. Entrance. After our entrance DJ was suppose to swicth to our first dance song but he kept going and going so it got really akwakrd standing there dancing in place. 

Actually I am sure there were even more than this. I remember laughing everything someone came up to me with something wrong. I’m glad I was able to let it all go and just laugh and enjoy it. In the end we got married and everyone had fun. No one knows those little details but us and it was still magical.

 

Post # 28
Member
19 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2017

I love reading these because it makes me feel like I’m not alone with my wedding flaws! We had a destination wedding in Bali with only 10 people so I didn’t think it would be that hard to make things go right. Alas, after MONTHS of researching hair/makeup artists and florists (the only two vendors I needed to find) both failed me.

My hair stylist/makeup artist lied to me and pretended she had accidentally booked me at 11 instead of 1 so she could fit in another wedding that day. I accepted that I’d be ready 2 hours earlier than I wanted since I thought she was the best option in Bali. Unfortunately, she made my hair look greasy and frizzy and it shows in all the photos and videos.

The florist arrived the morning of with completely different flowers than I ordered, they were DYING and yellow/orange (not even the same pink color I requested in my very simple order). The wrist corsages for my mom and MOH were package taped together and laughably hideous, we just threw them away.

I also felt like my dress was a bit difficult to wear…it was beautiful, but I had to tape the sides down and the tape didn’t last all day and I felt it looked really unflattering at some angles or if I wasn’t sucking in.

But, it’s been a few months and I’m getting to a place where I can just laugh those things off. The day itself was happy and filled with love.

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