(Closed) What went wrong?

posted 11 years ago in Married Life
Post # 77
101 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

We had our reception at a Chinese restaurant and we bring in our own wine. They promised to give us water glasses that looks like a wine glasses but w/ shorter leg, end up the gave us the regular fat water glass (I don’t know how to describe it better). It makes the wine looks really cheap, come on, wine in a water glass.. I still can’t get over it…

We arrived at the reception early but it didn’t ring a bell to me to actually appear and take pictures.. Now I felt dumb that I wasted a precious hour.. no one reminded us either.. I have little picture w/ me in the gown w/ individual guest. We even set up a backdrop for picture but ended up not using it at all…


There’s other things that went wrong, but they are minor and I can’t recall them hahaha.. it was only the 2 mentioned mishap that I still can’t get over… but despite these 2 things, we still have a funfilled blessed day! πŸ™‚

Post # 78
329 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Despite being a wonderful day, there were several things that went wrong.

-I forgot the memory stick with my program insert on it, so I was recreating it from memory until 1 in the morning.

-Despite my asking her to several times, my mom never had my dress pressed (the wedding was in my hometown which is many states away) and of the two steamers we brought, neither worked, so my dress wasn’t as wrinkle-free as I would have liked.

-While telling my Maid/Matron of Honor the names for the introduction at the reception, she somehow thought I said not to use my FI’s first name, so we were announced as “Mr. and Mrs. (His middle name) His last name”!

-The cake had lace on the last layer, which was very 80’s, and the flowers were all put on top instead of a few on each corner.  I had a friend fix them when I noticed it.

-The DJ played the wrong song that all couples were supposed to dance to (evidently the song didn’t match the title so he didn’t know the difference).

Thanks for this post-it’s cathartic to share with people who’ve been through it!

Post # 79
329 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

oops, double post

Post # 80
167 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Wow, every time I read a string of posts like this I pray my day goes by without major issues!

I actually was the mom with the screaming toddler at my cousin’s wedding, but I promptly left and took him as far as possible away so he didn’t interrupt. I missed her entire ceremony and regret it terribly but I would NEVER have stayed and allowed him to scream during it!! I was right in front of the guy holding the video camera too, lol.

But I have to say I am really happy we aren’t having cake or flowers for the vendors to mess up or the weather to destroy! I always read about these very expensive disasters-yikes!

Post # 81
166 posts
Blushing bee

We were married in July in the hot Texas heat.  The church failed to turn on the a/c upstairs where the guys were getting dressed.   It was hot and they were sweating long before they made it downstairs for the ceremony.   The chapel was sort of cool, not too much though.  Because of the heat, our best man fainted DURING the wedding ceremony.  We were kneeled down on the kneeling bench and our singer was singing “The Lord’s Prayer” when he went down across my train and veil.  I worked at a clinic at the time so there were several nurses there and a bunch of people jumped up to help carry him out.  The singer never skipped a note.  The photographer did not get a picture of the Bridesmaid or Best Man on the floor after he fainted.  That picture would have been priceless.

Another thing was that the punch fountain we rented did not arrive.  In it’s place they sent an ugly punch fountain. 

My mom let the top layer of our wedding cake slide off the top of the car while she was trying to unlock and open the door.

We drove out of town after the wedding to our “honeymoon suite” that had been paid for well in advance.  When we arrived at midnight or so, they had given our room away.  There were no rooms available.  They did at least call around and find us a room, though it wasn’t a honeymoon suite.

And finally, because my mother in law didn’t like me or want us to marry, she cried the entire day of our wedding.

Post # 82
231 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

So many things went wrong on our wedding day, but I still had a blast.

1. My husband and I found out his parents had finalized their divorce 2 days before the wedding – which ultimately led my Mother-In-Law to be super drunk during the rehearsal, rehearsal dinner, and the entire wedding day.

2. it SNOWED. we got married in May, and it was sunny the entire week prior. thank goodness everything was indoors.

3. My dance floor was set up wrong (I was the only one that knew, it wasn’t that big of deal)

4. All of the candles at the reception had not been lit by the hotel staff, so I had to track someone down before the guests started to arrive

5. My drunk Mother-In-Law made comments about the divorce during all the family pictures (my poor hubby was so embarassed)

6. The 2nd tier of our cake started to crumble while it was being cut. The hotel staff eventually pulled it because they couldn’t plate it

7. My DJ played the wrong song during our grand entrance

8. We waited 45 minutes to enter our reception because my husband wouldn’t do our grand entrance because he didn’t want his mom to miss it – who was MIA for some reason. Our poor DJ announced us once, and my husband refused to go in. So, someone finally found her and she made a big entrance before ours.

9. My brother in law’s girlfriend called me the day before and cried to me that she wanted to get ready with my DH’s brother instead of him getting ready with the rest of the groomsmen. She also was upset that she didn’t get to sit with him at the head tables. My husband and his brother are both in the military and BOTH flew into town for the wedding. My DH hadn’t seen his brother in 8 months, but she was upset that he was only in town for 2 days and he was spending the day with us for our WEDDING. (can you tell I don’t like this girl?) She also showed up to my bachelorette party and decided it was her place to stand in for my brother in law at the rehearsal (he didn’t get in town till 10 pm the night before). She showed up at my parents house for the rehearsal dinner, even though we sent invitations out – she didn’t get one.

10. My bridesmaids bouquets and grooms bouts were the wrong color. I wanted cool water roses (light purple), but they ended up being a dark pinkish color. It was still really pretty, and not entirely my florists fault – I should have known the color varied that much. Or… my florist could have told me πŸ™‚

It all sounds pretty bad, but I loved my wedding day. I was the only one that knew any of this was actually going on, but none of it was really a big deal. All of the bad was completely outweighed by the good! It feels SO good to finally get all of this off my chest πŸ™‚

ETA: my Mother-In-Law called my husband crying and apologizing the day after the wedding. it was completely out of character for her – she is still one of my best friends πŸ™‚

Post # 83
329 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I forgot to mention the worst thing.  I forgot two friends’ names (coming together) on the seating chart, one of whom was taking pictures at the reception for me.  They were offended by the staff who reseated them and the people they sat with, so they just left!  I had to have two other friends take pictures for me.


Post # 84
186 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Oh, where do I start?  I admit I think our wedding was wonderful and I wouldn’t change anything because I think something would still go wrong no matter what.  I’m so happy to be married and I was so glad to share that day with my friends and family.

But here’s what went wrong:

1. I was late to my hair appointment because the county fair sprung up over night.  There was a parade and all the roads from my apartment to the salon were blocked off!  I had to make some crazy detours to get there.

2. We didn’t have enough room in the car for all the stuff we had to take to the church.  Our ever-so-reliable Best Man volunteered to drive our non-air conditioned mini van down the church with all the cargo. (Our wedding took place a hour from where we live.  The guests weren’t the only ones traveling!)

3. Oh, and did I mention that it was over 100 degrees that day?  Hottest day this summer on this side of MO.  The heat alone made for a lot of problems.

4.  Our photographer almost didn’t make it.  Her ride bailed on her and she came down in a different (also non air conditioned!) car without a change of clothes.  So she was in sweaty shorts and a t-shirt the whole day.  Poor thing, and some misguided guests gave her grief for not dressing up!  I’m just glad she made the trip.  She’s a friend from college and was doing this as favor for cheap.

5. My now husband forgot to get his haircut until 2 hours before the ceremony.  I’m surprised he was able to get a walk-in.  I guess guys are just lucky that way.

6. I’m not sure if this counts, but my bachelorette party was a total distaster.  I didn’t have much fun because I was too sleep deprived.  We tried to make it so everyone would be there so we waited to start until one bridesmaid got off work at 11PM.  By the time we got around to it, everything was closed except a few casinos and we got bored with those pretty quick.  The girls made up for by having a spa night after the rehearsel dinner the night before the wedding.  The bachelor and bachelorette party was planned two nights before so no one would be hungover.  I never got to have a single drink the whole night.

7. Oh yeah, and our marriage almost wasn’t legal.  We had to beg a judge on the Friday before the wedding to waive the Kansas three day waiting period so we could get our marriage liscense.  We were mistakenly told by some state official that we needed a Missouri liscense since we were MO residents which has different rules only to be corrected later that we needed a Kansas liscense because the church was (just over) the KS state line.  It was a nightmare.  Luckily, the judge was agreeable simply because he knew my husband’s family.  (Yay, good ole boy system!)

8. Did I mention the heat?  It was like oppresively hot in the church.  It made it very difficult to put on the wedding attire.  Supposedly they did have the air conditioning on.  No one could tell. I think they just turned it one when we got to the church.  I hoping people can’t tell how badly we were sweating in the pictures.

9. My gown really need a second alteration.  The top was still a little too big and it made me scared about accidently exposing the girls.  It held just fine though.  Also, the bustle broke like 10 minutes after I put up my train.

10. The pastor did a completely different sermon than one we discussed and we didn’t get to do our own vows.  My only real regret about the whole thing.  But at that point I was just ready to get down from the altar and be married already, so I didn’t speak up.

11. I loved the bouquets, but they didn’t last long because of the heat.  None of them lived past the night, so no way of perserving them. πŸ™  We tried valiantly to keep them refridgerated and in the AC but it was a losing battle.

12.  Someone mistakenly put the IPOD on shuffle (there was a specific song order) when playing the reception music, so the wrong song came up for the father/daughter dance.  The Best Man quickly corrected it for us though.

13. Our reception festivities started an hour late because my family didn’t show up until then and I refused to do the cake cutting without them. πŸ˜›  That being said, all the other guests weren’t bored as we were mingling, laughing, sharing stories, and exploring the beautiful mansion while waiting for them.  We couldn’t start without them anyway because they were suppose to bring the drinks! (Wine and punch.)

14.  We had a lot of no shows.  Both the church and bed & breakfast has a maximum occupancy of 100 people.  We invited 120 expecting some not to attend.  We ended up with about 40 people out of the 60 who RSVPed “Yes”.  Only my parents and my brothers showed up on my side of the family.  Ouch.  One of the groomsman had to move people to my side of the church so it wouldn’t look so empty.  πŸ™  Mr. Foolhardy and I share a lot of the same friends and unfortunately they all started to gather unwittingly on his side.

15. I didn’t find this out until later, but I think I was allergic to the metal of the antique costume jewelry that I borrowed for the wedding.  I broke out in a rash on my neck and wrist where I worn the necklace and bracelet but I didn’t notice until the honeymoon.  It was so beautiful and perfect though that I think I would still wear it again knowing this.

16.  I’m embarrassed to admit that my dad was tipsy during the father/daughter dance (which I suspect is one reason they took so long to get the reception).  He was acting really goofy which entertained my guests but made my cheeks redden in embarassment.  You can tell in some pictures!  I hope people just assume I’m flushed from the heat and all the dancing around.  I’m not mad about it though.  I’m glad he was having a good time.

17.  Apparently, no one but my family knew to stand when my walked me down the aisle.  I was so nervous that I didn’t notice!  I had decided to keep my eyes on my future husband so I wouldn’t freeze up.

Um…I think that’s everything.  I know it seems like a lot, but so many things did go right that what went wrong doesn’t really bother me.  I still think we had a great wedding.  I think we need a “What Went Right” thread so I can gush about the good things. πŸ™‚

Post # 85
761 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Our wedding was awesome and the good things definetely made up for the few hiccups…

Water was spilled on the seating chart and set-up instructions which resulted in some tables being switched. It would not have been that bad except one table seated 10 people and the other only seated 6. So there were chairs being moved around at the last minute and DH’s aunts ended up sitting in the “nosebleeds”.

We wanted to test our i-pod on the stereo system beforehand but they lost the cable so we never got a trial run. Our dance music sounded messed up. The vocals were quiet and the instrumental was loud. There were not many people dancing though, anyway.

We forgot our marriage license. Yep, we’re those guys.

When  we got in from taking pictures everyone swarmed around us (like a disorganized receiving line) and we ended up being the last ones to eat. It totally messed up our plan to thank everyone as soon as we were done eating and then going around to all the tables individually.

I would have liked some more “creative” type photos of us.

Post # 86
71 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

We had a few things go wrong but they were completely out of my control so I can’t really complain!

The big one was that my mom forgot her reading for our unity candle ceremony at my house. I had to finish getting ready at our site and have photos taken so I couldn’t go back to the house with her and she ended up getting lost and taking forever to arrive for the ceremony. This meant that we were late starting, I didn’t have all the getting ready pictures with her, and we didn’t have enough time to take all the photos we wanted since the ceremony started late. I suppose I could’ve made a bigger deal about taking more photos but I really wanted to spend time with the guests during the reception rather than take more pictures.

The second thing was that I had a problem with my knee that required surgery but wasn’t fully diagnosed until immediately before the wedding. Because of that I couldn’t exercise properly in the months leading up to the wedding so I felt self conscious in my dress and we were not able to take lessons for our first dance and it ended up being a DISASTER! I was so embarrassed and wish we had skipped it altogether.

My sister forgot to give her husband the camera to record the ceremony. Someone else recorded it but was not sitting up front so the quality is not great.

The bouquets weren’t exactly what I wanted and one type of flower that I specifically requested numerous times was missing. At least the amount of bouquets, etc correct.

The last thing was the color on our cake was wrong but we were the only ones who knew and it still tasted delicious so not a big deal.

Post # 87
614 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2010

Looking back on our wedding, I have fond memories. It was a wonderful event and we were so happy! Little things that I look back on and (sometimes) laugh at:

I didnt sleep much for 3 days. Thursday I stayed up till 2 a.m. working on the playlist– had to work on friday. I cleaned off my ipod to put ONLY wedding music, and forgot to put the music on… luckily I brought my laptop to the venue, but the playlists didn’t work the same when Brother-In-Law was the DJ, so some songs were played 3 times during the reception. oops.

Friday I stayed up till 2-3 a.m. packing.

Saturday night before the wedding, I stayed up till 12 straightening my hair for the hairdresser. Got in bed and regretted not taking a benadryl like all my aunts suggested. I could.not.sleep. at 1 am, the elevator in the hotel next to our room started playing loud music. My dear Bridesmaid or Best Man went down to try to fix it and the front desk called the room with 8 girls sleeping in it to tell us he couldnt fix it. he called twice. I cried and didnt sleep much. My hairdresser arrived at 4:15 am(we had a morning wedding)

We’d planned the timeline carefully so after ceremony photos would be minimal and we could quickly get to the reception. My mom didn’t realize the family portrait was for extended fam only including up to cousins, and she called all of my second and third cousins back in from the reception for the first big photo. Wouldn’t have been a problem at all, except one of my third cousins fainted RIGHT as we took the first photo. my husbands elderly grandparents and all of us stood under the chapel lights for something like 30 min to take that one photo. So we were about an hour late to our reception at the same venue! I tried not to let it bother me but that was the ONE thing I really wanted to avoid– people sitting around forever.

Because of the long wait, we literally had people meeting us at the door to say goodbye as we were about to be introduced into the reception. Cousins of my husband! I felt like our reception was rushed because ppl kept leaving. It’s 11 am on a sunday! where are you going? lol. πŸ™‚ I didn’t get photos with my brothers at the reception and we missed talking to some people. Also I didn’t get any cake because I was afraid I wouldn’t get to talk to some of our guests before they left.

Our expensive engraved champagne flutes from my in-laws  didn’t make it onto the cake table.

We left for our honeymoon right after the wedding, but I forgot my beautiful shrug and cathedral veil in the hotel room. We were taking photos on our Honeymoon with them. πŸ™ At least i remembered my dress!

We didn’t sleep on the flight either. 8 hour flight with 3 nonstop screaming children–one of which was right behind us. So we slept the next day.

Good times! πŸ™‚



Post # 88
368 posts
Helper bee

1. Our DJ sucked. They didn’t play any of the music we wanted, they wouldn’t play our requests (or any of our bridal party), and they replayed a few songs, including “pretty fly for a white guy” – which will ALWAYS remind me of how crappy our music was.

2. I held in my “emotions” all day. I wanted to let go and cry during the ceremony, first dance, and father-daughter dance and I purposely held it in… looking back, I wish I would have done a better job of SHOWING my emotions vs. holding them in.

3. We have some good friends, and we wished they had been a bridesmaid/groomsman, but we had already asked our other friends/siblings over a year before the wedding, and we were “locked in” to who we picked.

4. It rained. But… that’s both a negative and a positive, because some of my favorite pictures (and memories) are with umbrellas and rain.

5. We didn’t have a videographer, and we are trying to reconcile a video off his mom’s camera from the ceremony.

Other than that – I LOVED the day!! Our food was great, and we spent it with our family and friends who loved and supported us. The ceremony was SO fast – like the blink of an eye. Luckily, we had the world’s BEST photographer, so I feel like I have about 600 memories of the day, and I am excited to NEVER get married again!! It was SO MUCH WORK, and although it was one of the best days of my life, I look forward to all the “best days” that are going to come in our new, married future together!! πŸ™‚

Post # 89
368 posts
Helper bee

P.S. That felt REALLY good to get it all out. πŸ™‚ No more regrets.

Post # 90
240 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

Oooh, I love this thread!  Logistically, I have to brag and say ours was pretty perfect.  The weather was more than cooperative, everyone was relaxed and on time that day, and the decor and design set up (which was a surprise for me) was even more amazing than I could have imagined.  We really lucked out on that part.  

One thing that I didn’t know and didn’t really find out until afterwards was the behavior of some of our guests, or rather one guest.  We had a friend officiate our wedding and during the ceremony, he did a flawless job.  But at the reception after a few too many drinks, he began hitting on my Maid/Matron of Honor who he’s had a quasi crush on for awhile.  And apparently the more he had to drink, the more aggressive he got to the point where he was actually chasing her around the hotel.  When I got my pictures back, sure enough, in many shots that my Maid/Matron of Honor was in, he was lurking kinda creepily in the background (thank goodness for photoshop!).  Everyone I guess noticed this but didn’t want to say anything to me that night, but later on the stories came out.  Even a year later when my friends would reminice about the wedding, they would be like, “jeez, what was up with the ‘minister’ at your wedding??  he wouldn’t leave that poor girl alone!”  I guess it makes for a funny story to go with the wedding but my Maid/Matron of Honor was pretty pissed for awhile :oP

Post # 91
431 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Wow , this thread makes me feel alot better that my wedding wasn’t the only one that wasn’t perfect! I have been beating my self at how horrible things went for the past 2 weeks!


1st: My sister who does not talk to me and got into a fight with me last OCT decides to come to my wedding thinking she wants to fix things, but NO , she was just so annoying and ruined my day speaking loudly about how her wedding will be like ON MY WEDDING DAY while photographer taking pics of me and the dress and through out the day!!

2nd: The hair lady (family friend) who people raved about her..left me to the end to do my hair and she didnt even do it right and it was horrible all day!! oh and plus the wind it made it look bunch of curls that arent curled right mixed together. I tried to fix it before ceremony and good thing it looked a bit better.

3rd: My dress got dirty at the bottom from a cars tire, black lines across the side of my dress that can be seen and that was before ceremony!! Thanks to my husbands cousins they were very helpful and cleaned it on time for ceremony. It still stained but much better than how it was before.

4th. Our photographer!!! He is very talented but too serious and so his work! I wanted some fun shots but all he did was made us look at each other and smile or talk or laugh and nothing different! Also I regret not saying something to him!! I was too worried about my dress being dirty at the time and wanted to cry!! Oh and we didnt take a lot of shots of me and hubby and we didnt get a chance to go to the park to take more pictures, its like the photographer didnt want to work!!!

5th. The dj did an amazing job on uplighting and songs but he repeated a song and it was kinda my fault. The song was used for our intro and then he played it to dance.

6th. People started leaving when the dance started and it got me down but some sticked around and we danced. I been crying for the past two weeks because I cant remember much of that night tho!

7th. The photographer left early and didnt get a shot of the garter toss or bouquet toss but we had those captured by a videographer.

8th. My dress got dirty again a small black line on the neckline and we tried to clean it and it made it look like a stain instead!

9th. Our cake wasn’t decorated all the way around and I thought the baker would know that!!! I wish I said something to him before coz I was going to but thought he would know better!

10th. it wasnt the dream weather but it stopped raining for the rest of the day for pics.

11th. Our honeymoon got cancelled because of storm Maria and we didnt get to go , so we spent few days at a hotel an hour away from where we live , we had fun but it didnt help getting over the wedding woes and on top of that the honeymoon….


Other than that… my husband cried at ceremony and made everyone cry and I couldn;t stop crying. He was very sweet and kept saying how beautiful I was and tried to calm me down and danced so hard to get people on dance floor and he was just very caring ( he always is ) but he was making sure I was doing okay that night.

I love him… and I am happy to be maried to him, but weddings do suck!! sorry they are never perfect!

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