Post # 1
So my fiancé and I are in the final process on deciding who to ask to be in our bridal party. He was pretty cut and dry but I am having such a hard time.
I have two sisters who I am both very close with, one who lives near me (sister A) and the other (sister B) lives in another state. I decided to ask them both to be bridesmaids because I felt that one would be upset if the other was the Maid/Matron of Honor. Even though I did want sister A to be my Maid/Matron of Honor, I couldn’t live with myself if I hurt sister B’s feelings, so for the Maid/Matron of Honor I decided to ask my childhood friend (who I wouldn’t say I’m super close with anymore but we are still friends).
A weekish or so ago I found out that sister A has been wanting to be my Maid/Matron of Honor since my fiancé and I have been talking about marriage/been together (10 years). Then I found out the sister B really doesn’t care who is the Maid/Matron of Honor and would completely understand if my sister A became the Maid/Matron of Honor.
So now I am completely confused on what to do. I honestly don’t think my childhood friend would be upset if she was just a bridesmaid because when I originally asked her to be in the wedding that’s what I asked her to be. But in the same sense I did ask her to be my Maid/Matron of Honor but I also feel we aren’t THAT close.
Have any of you ever been in this situation? What would you do?
Post # 2
Did you already expressly ask your friend to be MOH?
One solution is to have 2 Maid/Matron of Honor – especially easy if one is a Matron of Honor and the other is a Maid of Honor.
Or, have no Maid/Matron of Honor and have all Bridesmaid or Best Man. Still a bit sticky if you already asked your friend to be Maid/Matron of Honor. It’s hard to retract something like that without being hurtful.
Post # 3
Make the sister you want to be Maid/Matron of Honor and have the others be bms. I don’t think she would be upset. I mean it’s your sister how can she be mad about that. I have one sister and one really close best friend. I will have them both be my Maid/Matron of Honor. Although I am having 5 bridesmaids or i think I will. Planning is fun isnt it? (a small bit of sarcasm) ugh. It can be difficult.
Post # 4
You already asked your friend to be the Maid/Matron of Honor which kind of sucks if you would tell her never mine just be a Bridesmaid or Best Man. Is your friend very understanding? Or do you think ahe would be mad?
Post # 5
I haven’t talked with my Maid/Matron of Honor yet.. I’ve been trying to find the words. I also already have a Matron of Honor
I’m not 100% sure how she will take it. I’ve expressed to her recently how much of a pain in the ass it is trying to please everyone and how we were thinking about eloping, lol.
Post # 6
Your best fried should and will understand if you retrun her to bridesmaid status. My friend had both of her sisters as her MOHs, so go for it! No one cares about adhearing to tradition that tightly anymore anyways, and it is a sweet gesture.
Post # 7
Is your Sister A a twelve-year-old that’s going to get all pouty because someone else got a better title than she did?