(Closed) What would you do….

posted 5 years ago in Gifts and Registries
  • poll: Would you return you gifts if your marriage ended after only a few months?

    Yes

    No

    Other (Explain)

  • Post # 2
    Member
    70 posts
    Worker bee

    I think gifts should only be returned if the actual wedding never happens, like if the engagement is called off. The wedding actually happened, so she doesn’t need to return gifts in case of divorce. 

    Post # 3
    Member
    23 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: July 2015 - Harare, Zimbabwe

    No, the wedding is already over, so keep the gifts. Unless someone bought something outrageously expensive like a car or something…

    Post # 4
    Member
    3680 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    I’ve never understood this. The gifts were for the wedding – they got married. What are people going to do with a returned used toaster or a set of someone else’s china pattern? And for that matter, how long do you have to stay married before you can feel okay keeping the gifts? If I had a loved one going through a divorce, getting my gift back would be the last thing on my mind. 

    Post # 5
    Member
    7892 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    I can see both sides to the situation. I would think it would be good to get rid of all the reminders of the failed marriage, which would include the wedding gifts staring me in the face. Plus, the guests would probably appreciate getting back their potentially pricey gifts. On the flip side, returning ALL the gifts might be a big task, especially if you’ve already used some of them or if you are busy with the split. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    3164 posts
    Sugar bee

    I would feel extremely awkward if someone tried to return a guest for me. If I cared about someone enough to attend their wedding and select a gift for them the last thing I’d want them to do would be worry about returning gifts on top of the stress of Separating

    Post # 7
    Member
    2108 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2015

    They got married, so I think they should keep the gifts. The people who gave them to the couple love the couple, and definitely understand that divorce is a hard, messy thing, so adding more stress/worry/awkwardness to their pot is just unecessary. What your friend needs to worry about right now is sorting out and surviving everything that divorce entails, not how to give back the used toaster her uncle gave them 6 months ago. I’m sure everyone understands- life is very messy!

    Post # 9
    Member
    7528 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2014

    If it is something that hasn’t been used, I’d return it, and I’d return cash. Those gifts are meant towards building a household together and if my household is not longer in need of a food processor because it’s no longer a household, then I should return the food processor.  If it’s been used, it’s much more grey area.

    its important to keep in mind that wedding gifts are not in honor of the wedding. They’re in honor of the marriage.

    Post # 10
    Member
    4038 posts
    Honey bee

    6 months? I’m assuming I would have used every one of those gifts and spent the cash/checks to buy larger items. It’s hard to return part of a sofa, to each of 10 guests. Anything I wouldn’t plan on using would probably already been exchanged or gotten store credit for. They may be a few odd things that I’d never use and couldn’t return, that I’d be more than happy to return to the giver.

    The topic ‘What would you do….’ is closed to new replies.

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