Post # 1
Im not sure what to do exactly even though this might be a very silly issue but im still very much confused on what I should do.
me, my husband and my husbands family are invited to his uncles house for a late dinner ( around 8: 30 pm )– My husband said he wont be able to make it since he heads out to work around 10 pm– so he doesnt wnat to rush back home and get ready, etc etc. Now, he said if I want to go, I can go with out him ( with his mom and sister ). I find it kind of weird and hesitant to go since I never ever stepped foot into his uncles house and this is a family dinner. Kind of weird to not go with my husband on a first dinner weve been invited to.. Would it be rude if I dont go?
Post # 3
Does your husband think it would be rude if you didn’t go?
Post # 4
personally, I wouldn’t want to go either. I think that if your husband says that both of you can’t go because he has to work, that’s a good enough excuse.
Maybe you and your husband can invite his family over at a different time. Then you can get to know them and they’ll see that you’re not avoiding socializing with them.
Post # 5
@VAwife: yea! iw as going to call them up if I chose not to go and apolgize! I dont want to come off as rude for not going but at the same time his sister and mom are going ( we live together ), but its my first time to be invited to a dinner and I dont want to go with out my husbad..
Post # 6
If I were close with the sister and mom then I would go
Post # 7
I too would go. You’re family now.
Post # 8
I would definitely go! You’re family now! and what better way to show you’re trying to fit in and get to know everyone by going without him! It may be uncomfortable at first, but the more often you do it the more normal it will become!
Post # 10
Meh I wouldn’t go. Not without my husband for at least the first time.
Post # 11
I’d go, you are part of the family now and you’ll have his mom and sister there so im sure you wont feel left out or uncomfortable. i think its the perfect opportunity to bond more with the family and for them to embrace you as part of theirs as well.
Post # 12
If the Invite had come ONLY to you and your Hubby, and he couldn’t make it, then ya, I’d not attend alone.
BUT because it is a “Family Dinner” and both your Mother-In-Law, SIL and the two of you have been invited, even though your Hubby can’t go I’d still go (more so cause you live with the others)
It really is about making the effort to show that you appreciate the invite, and are part of a BIGGER social unit now… “an Extended Family” (don’t be “the girl” who can’t go anywhere without her Hubby at her side… be the confident spouse)
Hope this helps,
PS… ETIQUETTE TIP – Be a gracious guest… smile, be polite, bring or send a gift for the Host (such as wine or flowers… the later day before or after… if wine don’t expect your Host to serve it to you… as it is a Gift for them)… and send a Thank You Note afterwards. In an essence here you’ll be representing BOTH yourself & your Hubby so put your best foot forward… it will make an impession, and hold you in good stead with that side of the family.
Post # 13
Thank youe veryone for your responses!
I dont mind going, Ive met him before and him and his wife are nice people. There a few reasons to why I dont want to go– such as because of our religion, we are fasting ( its ramadan– no eating and drinking from 4 am- 8 30 pm ) — so m husband will be fasting and wont have a prepared dinner — [ I would feel bad about that, I guess thats the kind of wife I am ] 2) His work lunch, I prepare it for him every day.. adn 3– since i live with his family, we never really had the house to ourselves– so I figured it would also be cute and romantic to take the oppurtunity and have a nic candle lit dinner with him before he goes off to work.. guess to use that advantage.. since it never happens! ( full house )..
Im very social and they know im friendly, but Im looking at it from the perspective that its our first dinner to be invited to and even though its okay to go with out him, I dont like the idea of me not going with out him — Im still trying to figure it out!! LOL