(Closed) What would you do for 12k? Money drama I need help…long

posted 7 years ago in Money
  • poll: What would you do?
    Take him up on the offer. : (64 votes)
    60 %
    Turn him down. : (38 votes)
    36 %
    Other : (4 votes)
    4 %
  • Post # 3
    6572 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: February 2010

    I wouldn’t do any of it. Those are such personal decisions, it should be something you want to do, not are forced to. When people contribute to weddings, I feel like it should be a gift to the bride and groom, and this seems more like a bribe.

    Post # 4
    2450 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    only say yes to if if he wants to also pay for your Fiance to go back to school. school is going to cost more than the $12,000 that he’s willing to give you so really he’d be putting you in worse shape by forcing this financial burden on you.

    Post # 5
    2192 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    @rosworms: I agree.  The way school prices are shooting up if he really wants to go back to school than he would need more than the $12,000 to cover that.  The other options seem easier.  I would take a financial planning class and as long as you guys are ok with the religious aspect why not?  No reason to go into debt over a wedding.

    Post # 8
    2450 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    @basketballwifetobe: then yeah i’d do it. you get $12k for the wedding and your Fiance gets to finish school for free? take it now. your Fiance may feel that college is a waste of time… but employers don’t. having a degree will definitely help with your future.

    Post # 9
    10851 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2010

    I think financial planning classes are a good idea for anyone, so I would do that regardless of his offer. The idea that he has all these conditions and targets you have to reach to hit $XX is bizarre and gives me the heeby jeebies for some reason. Your FI’s beliefs and religion shouldn’t be up for sale. He should do what he believes and feels in his heart, regardless of the cash.

    Post # 12
    5778 posts
    Bee Keeper

    I see nothing but good things being offered, and it may be just the motivation your Fiance needs to get it done. I’d do it in a NY minute.

    Post # 13
    2512 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    Ya I would say “Thank you but no thank you” ….

    The other night my dad said it would be ok for me to have a tree finger print guest book at the wedding if I went to church. I lawld pretty hard and said I was having it anyways.



    Post # 14
    9824 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper

    WB ate half my response yet again. Bye, weddingbee. I’ll be back when the glitches are fixed.

    Post # 15
    1577 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    This is very strange.  Even so.. I’d probably do the financial planning classes at the very least.. because i’d do that anyway.  The religious stuff is up to your Fiance.  I mean, I guess if he’s Catholic anyway, it’s not a HUGE deal.. it’s not like he’s asking your Fiance to convert or something, but it’s still kinda odd.  And personally, I’d take him up on the school offer.  I have my bachelor’s and while I learned a lot during college, I sort of see your point.  I don’t think it’s totally necessary to have a degree to do a lot of jobs out there… BUT.. a lot of jobs require a degree anyway. 

    Post # 16
    7975 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    Someone is offering to pay for your FI’s college education, no strings attached, and you’re considering turning him down? Send him over here – I’d love a SFIL who wanted to pay for my Masters!

    I’m guessing your Fiance has already done most of his gen eds, if he got through 2+ years of college; that leaves the fun and worthwhile classes. Just encourage him to pick a major that he actually enjoys and will benefit from – school is only pointless if you study something you won’t use.

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