(Closed) What would you do?!?!?!…. I need to get this cleared up STAT

posted 9 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
153 posts
Blushing bee

I’d just keep telling her that she’s not in the bridal party.  Over and over again.  Every time she brings it up, say (firmly but politely) that you’ve already discussed this with her and she is not in the bridal party.  And that’s it.  If she brings it up again, say the same line.  Do it over the phone, over a text, over an e-mail.  Just one line, that’s all.

However, I think the date thing isn’t too big of a deal.  Unless you weren’t going to let her bring a guest…that’s another can of worms!  =)

Post # 4
Member
2781 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

What blightygirl said. She sounds like she’s trying to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man by asking constantly. Just tell her firmly that it’s not an option, that your bridal party has already been sorted.

Post # 5
Member
4001 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Yeah, I agree with the girls.  You’re just gonna have to remind her that she’s not in the party.  I do think it would be a nice gesture to still try (if you can stand her) to include her in some wedding related things.  Or even better, when its closer to the wedding, ask her to run a couple errands for ya.  As annoying as she is, it sounds like its coming from a good place- she cares about you, so try your hardest (I know, easier said than done) to tolerate it.  There’s not much else you can do!  There’s not a chance that you both can add one more to the party is there?  Not that you should, just curious.

Post # 6
Member
2342 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

YIKES!!  I think she needs to be told every single time “you’re not in the wedding” just like the other girls stated!  She’s clueless and in denial!  Or keep her busy doing something else for you!

Post # 8
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Reaffirm it over and over.

I kinda feel bad for her! She sounds like she’s 13 or something! Assign her some small task–guest book or something? But can totally get your frustration! I’d be annoyed too!

Post # 9
Member
1205 posts
Bumble bee

I second the broken record idea.  you have to stand your ground and be sure to let anyone you need to (BMs, a coordinator, etc) what she is supposed to be doing.  That way, there are no “fast ones”

Post # 11
Member
110 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Okay, I kind of know where you’re coming from as far as creepy stalkerish stuff goes.
My fiance and I met this fabulous couple a month ago and have been hanging out with the pair of them once or twice a week since. I’m having a blast but the girl has become super clingy to me and yesterday introduced me as her best friend. Weird…but I didn’t think anything much of it.
That was until she sent me an email telling me how glad she was to have such a great BFF. Ohcrap…
We’re not having attendants in our wedding at all so as to not hurt feelings of our family and friends. I found out this morning that this girl went out and bought herself a freaking dress in green and black (our colors) so that she can serve as my Maid/Matron of Honor. I’ve told her MANY times that it’s not happening but she can’t seem to get it in your head. She keeps saying crap like, “Oh well…you’ll need someone to be there with you that day. I’ll just straighten your train a little bit.”
Are you kidding me spaz? I don’t have an assigned Maid/Matron of Honor because I’m without willing parties it’s because I DIDN’T WANT ONE.
She’s really freaking me out now. Both my fiance and I have had to back off of this friendship with this couple and kind of avoid hanging out with them because she’s scaring us a bit.
I overheard her telling her spouse the other day that she couldn’t wait to show her support by standing up there next to me and even told her spouse that they needed to get a suit since he was my fiances best man.
They also fairly regularly say things to their friends like, “Hey, we’re going to go to a wedding in Newport Beach November 7 -do you wanna come with us?”

Solucky…I feel your pain.

Post # 13
Member
3125 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

miss soontobee!  Get yourself some personal security, my goodness. I have NEVER Heard anything like this!  Most people would be relieved not to have to do all that stuff as a new aquaintance. 

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