(Closed) What would you do if you were me? Rant/vent.

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: Should I wear the headband or not?
    Heck yes! : (68 votes)
    42 %
    No, even though it will break your heart. (Kind of) : (94 votes)
    58 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    342 posts
    Helper bee

    Well, for SOME reason he has a very stromg opinion about headbands! As weird as that is, and you don’t understand it, I’d not wear it. If it’s going to affect him that adversaly…

    Post # 4
    Member
    8 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    I honestly think his comments are hurtful and uncalled for!! Having said that, my Fiance is being a bit of an ass lately, so maybe I’m just being overly sympathetic!  As nice as it is that you are trying to make him happy, he should be doing the exact same for you!!  It’s a headband for godsake, and if its something that is going to make you feel special on your day, then frankly he should want what you want (within reason), and I think a headband has got to be the easiest thing he could overlook without overlooking you.

    Post # 5
    Member
    625 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I would tell him that I won’t wear it and then be passive aggresive until he changed his mind and told me he’d be ok with it :p

    He is being pretty immature, IMO. If it’s such a huge deal, I certainly wouldn’t want him rolling his eyes at you on your wedding day. But at the same time, he’s being kind of a jerk for making such a stance about it in the first place.

    So in conclusion: ditch the headband, but don’t be happy about it, and be sure he knows it. It’s my patented method for SO control.

    Post # 6
    Member
    374 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    Men don’t know anything about style LOL! You should post a picture of it 🙂 I would probably still wear it. But I do think he is being way too dramatic about it.

    Post # 7
    Member
    235 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    Honestly… he sounds like a child. His comments were immature and rude. It sounds like he’s trying to ‘win’ the sitatuon more than anything.

    You’re the bride, you should wear what makes YOU feel beautiful. Doesn’t matter what everyone else says. You said you loved your headband…then you should wear it. I’ve rarely heard of a man caring about the headband their gf/wife is wearing…

    Perhaps the best way to get through him is to be as immature? Maybe you do something similar about his look for the wedding day. Suggest a haircut you want him to have! (something he’ll be like HECK NO) or make him wear something you know he won’t want. 

    Maybe then he’ll kinda get how childish he was and back off on the ‘headband’ matter. MEN can be childish sometimes…actually..OFTEN. So sometimes we gotta communicate to them as if they are one. 🙂

    Post # 8
    Member
    8438 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    I would probably talk to him about. Maybe there is something in his past that has affected him so he has a real dislike for headbands. you never know there could be a hundred reasons such as he was bullied and made to wear one, every girl that has been mean to him wore one etc etc. Relationships are about communication and he has been open and honest with you about his dislike so be open and honest with him in return and let him know it has upset you and you need to understand why he is bothered by it.

    Post # 9
    Member
    1301 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    @Future_Mrs_Naugle:  I would not wear it. I knew there were some things my Darling Husband does not like and I made sure not to have them as part of my wedding look. As a side note, headbands are very in fashion now but are not really a timeless look. While you might think it looks great now it may look dated in years to come. 

    Post # 10
    Member
    374 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    “Maybe there is something in his past that has affected him so he has a real dislike for headbands.” 

    LOL!

    Post # 11
    Member
    3692 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: December 2011

    There has to be some underlying thing to this.  I’ve never known a guy to have versions to a woman’s hair accessories.

    Post # 12
    Member
    9198 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

    I think It depends on how much of the wedding planning he’s had a good say in.  If he hasn’t been that involved but feels very strongly about this headband, why not try to find some other hair/veil/decoration and let him win this one?  It’s his special day too.  If he’s being this bossy about LOTS of issues, then perhaps it’s a good time to stand your ground. 

    My guy is pretty easy-going but once in a while has a VERy strong (and seemingly random, to me) opinion about something.  I usually try to let him have his way since most of the time he’s down for whatever…

    Post # 13
    Member
    3572 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    I would wear it.  He doesn’t get a say on your appearance at your wedding, or later on.  Claiming he won’t be happy because it will affect his focus is a horrible thing to tell you.  A bride has enough stress worrying about looking pretty with all eyes on her!!

    Post # 14
    Member
    928 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    Man. What he said was pretty hurtful. If you wear a headband then he won’t think you look as nice and will be distracted all day and it’ll ruin the wedding for him, essentially? That’s VERY WEIRD and his comments are very MEAN. I don’t even know what to say. This is just a glimpse into your relationship with him, so I don’t have the whole picture. But if he is mean and controlling/manipulative like that regularly, then you should re-think marrying him. But if this is just a one time freak out of his, then maybe you should not wear the headband and pick out something else for your hair… but not tell him what it is before the wedding day so he can’t veto that, too.

    Post # 15
    Member
    2065 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: December 2011

    Maybe he had an ex or something that always wore headbands and it would remind him of her and who wants that on their wedding day? Who knows, who cares? If he feels that strongly, I’d just nix the headband.

    For everyone saying she’s the bride and he gets no say…if he wanted to wear or do something the bride absolutely HATED, wouldn’t you suggest that he compromise? It’s HIS day too.

    Post # 16
    Member
    5075 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: October 2012

    wow.  My Fiance wouldn’t even know what a headband is.

    Did you ask him why he feels that way?

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