What would you do? Marriage License…POLL

posted 8 months ago in Destination Weddings
  • poll: What should I do?
    Get a Colorado license and sign before leaving for the wedding : (18 votes)
    44 %
    Get a Colorado license and sign during the wedding in Maine : (6 votes)
    15 %
    Suck it up and get a Maine license : (17 votes)
    41 %
  • Post # 16
    Member
    480 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2019

    Can’t you guys just sign it before/after getting back in Colorado, if you’re a stickler for rules? Say a few cheesy vows beforehand if it makes you feel better. I personally wouldn’t have any scruples about signing it in Maine, but I’m not always a rule follower. I don’t really foresee how it could bite you, because the government would never have a way of finding out unless you told them, which I’m guessing would only happen in the case of a horrifically contentious divorce (and even then, I don’t know that they’d care/it would matter much). 

    Post # 17
    Member
    1464 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2018

    I think you have 3 good options-

    1) Get a CO license and sign it before the wedding. Self solemnize. Your official wedding location and date will be before your wedding ceremony and party in Maine. The Maine ceremony won’t legally be the wedding, but no one really needs to know that.

    2) Get a CO license and sign it after the wedding. Self solemnize. Your official wedding location and date will be after your wedding ceremony and party in Maine. The Maine ceremony won’t legally be the wedding, but no one really needs to know that.

    3) Take the 30 minutes it takes to get your grandma ordained in Maine, and use a Maine license. Your Maine ceremony will be your official wedding.

    Post # 18
    Member
    2867 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2018

    I would just sign the license in Colorado either before or after your wedding in Maine. Going through the hassle to ordain your grandmother and dealing with an out of state marriage certificate just seems unnecessary. No one ever thinks they will be in such a shitty situation, but how do you plan on handling things in the event that your marriage ever be called into question? As a pp referenced, what if one of you were to get sick or be seriously injured and the other makes a decision for your treatment that the respective parents are 100% against? This might seem like a far reach right now but people are in car accidents or become extremely ill every single day. It’s just not something I would leave to chance. 

    Post # 19
    Member
    769 posts
    Busy bee

    I think the legalities are covered above.. Whilst I’m not usually a strict rule follower, I am also a lawyer, so it is ingrained to me that jurisdictional rules be followed for contract validity. Sure, it’s higgly unlikely that if you fudge something no one will ever find out….IF everything later goes smoothly with the contract. If there is a dispute, you never know what could come to light in court.

    For practical reasons you seem to want a CO licence. If I were you I would complete the licence it just before I leave CO for the wedding in Maine.

    Could the grandmother not just perform a non-legal ceremony in Maine? Ie do the whole thing, vows etc, but without the legal register signing? This is quite common for destination weddings (and also humanist wedding ceremonies in the U.K. where they are not legally binding yet – people do the courthouse legalities first, then have a humanist ceremony at their actual big wedding). You can still then write your own bespoke ceremony and make it really personal / not have any legalities to follow.

    Geting granny ordained just do do the register inMaine seems overkill and unnecessary, particularly when a Maine licence is not ideal for you.

    Post # 20
    Member
    9444 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I would just sign it and have it legally done in CO. I wouldn’t take any chances with such a legally binding agreement.

    In case of some catastrophic event, would you really want someone bringing photos/videos of you signing your invalid marriage license in Maine? I mean shit happens.

    Post # 21
    Member
    7919 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    also this is the set-up to a classic Mad About You episode lol. They found out 20 years later their marriage wasn’t valid because of a paperwork screw-up!

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