(Closed) What would you do? (We couldn’t afford to contribute to a group gift, but….)

posted 7 years ago in Gifts and Registries
  • poll: If you couldn't financially contribute to a group gift, would you have your name signed to the card?
    No, it implies you financially contributed to the gift. : (15 votes)
    65 %
    Yes, - why not, it was offered and it doesn't change anything : (7 votes)
    30 %
    Other.... : (1 votes)
    4 %
  • Post # 3
    46453 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I would do exactly the same thing. I would not feel comfortable taking credit for a gift to which I did not contribute.

    Post # 4
    743 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    If the giver had offered to include our names on the card, I would just say thank you and be done with it.  By giving them a “separate” card, you are making yourself stand out – if I was receiving the gift, I would wonder why the the group gift did not include you – and this is not about you, it is about the person receiving the gift.

    If the giver did not include our names, I would not have asked to be put on the card (since we did not contribute) but I would have given the person a separate card.

    Post # 5
    1944 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2009

    I would have done the same thing you did. I refuse to take credit for a gift I did not contribute to.

    Post # 6
    612 posts
    Busy bee

    This is happening with my mom right now – my sisters and I want to buy her a seat in a theatre (as a donation to the theatre) but only two of us can really afford it. However, it would be silly to have the gift come from only two of us, it really means more if we all give it together. That’s why one sister will be contributing $10, which is the most she’s able to afford right now. The amounts supplied by each person don’t really matter as much as the thought itself. If my sister really couldn’t afford even $1 then I’d still want the gift to come from all of us – if anything, I’d want it MORE!

    But if you just really don’t have any interest in going in on the gift then that’s a whole other issue. I would never get MAD at my sister if she refused to go in on the gift, that’s a bit uncalled for.

    Post # 7
    7770 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2010

    That is really tough.  If the gifter really thought it was important to the receiver to see our names… maybe.  At that point it is kind of up to the gifter.  I don’t know.  I think it depends how close you are.  I mean, we do that with family sometimes… I am not sure about it with anyone else.  I guess the gifter just wanted the receiver to feel like you were behind it/ supporting her- more than the money to contribute.  Maybe that was not the point for her.  I can see both sides…  At the same time, you did the right thing not taking credit- but maybe it was more about emotionally support of the appearance of it (?)

    Post # 8
    128 posts
    Blushing bee

    oh I didn’t read your whole post before I answered and I said no. But since they offered to sign your names anyway I would be very greatful and send that person a thank you letter and just go with it.

    The topic ‘What would you do? (We couldn’t afford to contribute to a group gift, but….)’ is closed to new replies.

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