(Closed) What would you like you SO to do in bed that he does not do now?

posted 8 years ago in Intimacy
Post # 77
2116 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013



He doesn’t initiate, but he’s always ready. I think he doesn’t initiate because he doesn’t want me to feel pressure at all.

Post # 78
421 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Lol more kissing and lick the cat!! 

Post # 79
206 posts
Helper bee

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@ArmyWife8806:  THIS!

Fair is fair afterall.

Post # 80
233 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

Initiate and get a little rough sometimes. Oh, and more quickies! 

Post # 81
47 posts
  • Wedding: May 2014

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@atlbride2013:  Kink.com is amazing.  50 shades of Grey is boring in comparison.  Fiance is very aggressive and dominant – so sexy.  He can also do what he calls the “tender, sweet lovin’,” but it is not really our style.  I’m working on becoming more dominant since he is interested in taking on a more submissive role sometimes.  It took a while to get used to it, but I am really loving it.

We also have an open relationship, where we have sex with others, usually with the other involved.  I wouldn’t mind him bringing more women home so I can watch him work.  Makes me realize how good I have it in the sex department.  Plus, it is a huge turn on.

Post # 82
1782 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Massage my feet and kiss my stomach area.  All else is really great!

Post # 83
9831 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2019

oral, i give him oral heaps and for half an hour or more, he usually does it ONCE every few months and for no more than three minutes! and even then it is only when i ask for it. i would also like for him to make noise, he is silent.

Post # 84
650 posts
Busy bee

Longer foreplay, more oral but otherwise he’s good

Post # 85
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I don’t want to brag but my hubby does just about everything: Tossing salad, oral, sucking toes, anal, massages, etc.  But what he won’t freaking let me do is, use a butt plug on him.  I so want to do that.  I know I’m weird but I heard it actually feels really good to a man.  Oh well, I guess I will never know Frown 

Post # 86
2490 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

Hmm seems what most bees want is also what I want… for him to be more dominating… push me against the wall, force himelf on me kinda thing… Usually I’m the one on top :/ Not that that’s bad because I get off better that way, but sometimes I could use some more sexy aggression :]

Post # 88
1798 posts
Buzzing bee

Probably just more kissing because he is kind of just go to town instead of working his way up to it…LOL. We also live in our parents’ homes, so it’s kind of hard to do it at all with any bit of privacy, so I will get back to you when we finally move in together. 


Is anyone else’s SO really bad at dirty talk? He tries really hard even though I don’t care one way or another. I just don’t think he’s good at multitasking, so it ends up him just repeating the same sentence over and over again. He is fully aware of how terrible it is too, which confuses me because he insists on it LOL. 

Post # 89
258 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

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@mrsamartin:  He should just man up and try it, my hubs has said the most powerful Os he has had have been while plugged! remember to start small

Post # 90
327 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

For the ladies who want their man to be more aggressive.. (or really whatever you want him to do more of)..

I just had a conversation with my Fiance about this after telling him about this thread and he says that you need to tell your men exactly what you want!  He said assume that your man is totally into this too and is just scared to do it with you.  He’s uncomfortable about doing it to you, his ‘wife’, and thinks only “bad girls” are into that. haha He’s scared you won’t like it or that he’ll hurt you, and he doesn’t want to feel stupid if he does something that hurts you and you freak out (which is what he thinks in his head would happen).

He said you need to be the one to talk to him about it and in the beginning, you need to be the one to ‘take charge’ in terms of getting him to do what you want.

I actually had to do this with him too.  I wanted him to be more agressive and had to tell him (repeatedly) so and that I really meant it.  This includes telling him even during sex what I wanted him to do, e.g grab him by the back of his neck during sex and tell him to f#@k you harder (I am not a talker so this took some effort on my part but worthwhile ;).. or surprise him when he comes home and be waiting for him in some sexy lingerie and heels (FI says sexy heels, but definitely not “stripper heels”, i.e glass heels) 

You need to ‘baby step’ him into it. Especially initially.. until he gets more comfortable with doing that stuff with you.

And you can always remind him if he forgets or gets too lax about it.. 😉

But most important, remember to have fun with it!

Post # 91
2022 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I wish he was more spontanious. Like not ask if we are going to have sex tonight…well damn not now! That is so not sexy.  I wish he would get home from work and pull me into the bedroom or up against the wall.  Oh fifty….yep I want it all! I tried talking to him about how “are we having sex tonight” doesnt do anything for me but turn me off. its like mother may i? No, be a man and grab me and show me how bad you want me.  He still asks…so annoying.

Post # 92
1789 posts
Buzzing bee

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@ArmyWife8806:  if he doesnt lick the cat, then you dont lick the lollipop. Simple as that

I told that to an ex that wouldnt…and he learned pretty fast!!


He needs to take initiative more. The sex and foreplay is great, and he still doesnt slack on the snuggling, but sometimes all I get is a tap and “babe…lets do it” No. I want to be suprised, like come up behind me when Im cooking dinner and bend me over the counter.

Thats the one thing I miss, the I GOTTA HAVE YOU NOW!! act they do at first, and then they get lazy.


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