(Closed) What would you say to Ben Affleck?

posted 7 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
9824 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

I think marriage gives you more incentive to stick with the relationship when times get tough, and I want that accountability. I need the promise, and the highest commitment two people can give each other when they are in love, in front of God and the people we care about. I don’t feel I should have to give that up.

Post # 4
Member
1543 posts
Bumble bee

My first inclination would be to get all smart ass on him and say, “Uhh, well first off, I don’t intend to have babies and buy a house and share responsiblilties with my best friend(s).”  (insert scrunchy ‘whaddaya-have-to-say-to-that?’ face)

That’s all I’ve got.

Post # 5
Member
11325 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

I think the legal arguments alone are worth the piece of paper. I can see that argument more legitimately for weddings which really are a bit silly if you think about it (my best excuse for wanting one was…. i just really do!). But getting married itself? 

-it protects you financially (via retirement benefits, social security, life insurance, etc)

-it protects your health (sometimes). I couldn’t get decent insurance without my husband. Also, if he was in an accident before, I would have no ability to see him or have a say in his health decisions. How crazy is that. 

I’m sure there are other reasons I’m thinking of. But just a cold financial view of things says there IS a benefit to being married vs. not if you’re going to be together forever anyways. 

Post # 7
Member
2398 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I’d say his fear of getting married is obviously due to his relationship to his parents/his fear of commitment/some other bullshit reason and then wait.

Two can play at the “I have ESP and know everything about intentions” game.

Post # 9
Member
2154 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I think that what he’s saying is true for some people. No one “owes” anyone a marriage. I used to not want to get married for a lot of those same reasons. I wouldn’t ask anyone to go against their ideals just to be with me, and I wouldn’t want to be with anyone who wanted me to go against my ideals… if that makes any sense at all.

Now I will stop talking about this, because that movie was shitastic and I don’t want to think about it ever again.

Post # 10
Member
11325 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

Also, getting married IS the societal norm (at least in the US, I know it is different in some other areas). So it seems to me that to break tradition you should have a reason. And also, if it is important to your girlfriend and it doesn’t matter either way– why not do it PURELY because she wants to. I mean if its no different right? If he’s not going to leave? If he isn’t scared to commit? Why NOT do it?

Post # 11
Member
2607 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Doesn’t he propose to her at the end anyway?

Post # 13
Member
2309 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

Because I do not want to be your 67 year old girlfriend when that time comes.Why not just put me out my misery with said $45 certificate if you can.

Post # 14
Member
3587 posts
Sugar bee

@VintagePink: I think it’s a wedding thing. I think maybe a lot of guys see it as an unnecessary spendage and show?

From that speech (never seen the movie) and thinking on the wedding (not marriage aspect) I feel he’s kinda right. Some ppl do have to put on a show. Sometimes I see it as an unnecessary spendage, but that’s because I have other things to focus on right now. If you’d asked me that in December, I’d be happy to spend it, but it still would be a small destination wedding to cut down on how much we spend.

The topic ‘What would you say to Ben Affleck?’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors