What would you tell your first time mom self?

posted 3 weeks ago in Babies
Post # 31
Member
8278 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

@slhbee doing what’s right for you and your baby is sometimes the hardest thing, but you’re doing great! I hope you heal up quickly, but one thing that really helped me when I had cracking/bleeding was coconut oil on my nipples. It was very soothing and helped moisturize way better than the lanolin the hospital gave me. It also has some antifungal/antimicrobial properties that will help prevent infection while you have open wounds. You got this mama!! 

Post # 33
Member
2310 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

I loved the newborn stage. Our son would sleep in in the morning so I would do so with him. I would tell myself that you are not a bad mother if you use formula and I agree that everytihng is a stage. Also do what feels right for you. If you aren’t into letting your child cry it out then don’t. It didn’t feel comfortable to me so I never did it and I don’t regret it. Was I tired one I went back to work and he was waking at night?? yes but I don’t regret cuddling with our babes because they really do grow up fast. The last thing is that I don’t have to literally jump every time he fusses. He needs something and I will get to him ASAP but it is ok if he or she fusses for a minute or two. You have needs too. 

Post # 34
Member
806 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2016

Don’t compare. Stop looking at the clock. Not everything has to be enriching/developmental/educational/wholesome/healthy/blah blah blah. Have fun!

Post # 35
Member
9223 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

the days are long but the years are short.

Post # 36
Member
213 posts
Helper bee

mom of 2–These are the things I would tell myself (or kept close to my heart)

#1- understand that maternal anxiety and neuroticism are common and normal, if you can function through them. It’s your nervous systems way of telling you to open your eyes and pay attention to the threats around. This makes these emotions purposeful, and made me regard them as less daunting. 
#2- life is fragile, and motherhood is a gift. Not everyone gets to experience it. Keeping that in mind when the baby/toddler/both are shrill screaming helped
#3- Your main job as a parent is to socialize your child so that they’re a desirable playmate by the time they’re 4. After that, they learn by playing with their peers, so it is of utmost importance that they are desirable to play with. 
#4- Once they start to explore, it’s time to slowly back off. Let them fall, let them learn their limits. There’s nothing worse than a 2 year old infant. Toeing the line between keeping them safe and letting them grow up has been the hardest challenge for me. 

#5- be predictable. Be consistent. 

 

Post # 37
Member
9824 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

Don’t expect to sleep well again until your kid is 45-ish.  Or somewhere in there.  

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