(Closed) What would your SO be like he was without you?

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
1902 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Haha, this question reminds me of this song – I love Tim Minchin!

Post # 4
Member
2167 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I’m not entirely sure my SO would be alive today if we had not met, and same thing vice versa. We were both separately going through incredibly sad and frightening times before we met, struggling with alcoholism. We met close to a year ago and have both been sober that long as well. I thank the stars above every day for him. He told me once that me coming into his life was like a tear drop from God. I feel exactly the same way. We were incredibly fortunate.

Post # 6
Member
449 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

We just talked about this today actually, haha. I had been at work all day and I came home and he had put blankets over all the windows and he was playing video games. I’m the one who makes him leave the house! 

Post # 7
Member
1123 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

When we met… He was drinking every night and doing drugs… Over the years he’s stopped with both and now attends church regularly and we are both working to build our faith together.

When we met I was highly insecure. I swore off all men. I was emotional, I was depressed, I hated myself and couldn’t even look anyone in the eye. Didn’t feel like I was worth it.

Now we are both doing wonderfully, I feel better about myself then I ever have and he does as well.

We would both be lost if we hadn’t found eachother

Post # 8
Member
6015 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

@sillysillybee:  what a great basis. .. needing each other 😀

I’d be lost with him.  He’d be broke.  I’m tight with money, he spends as fast as he makes it.  I’m emotional only to certain people, most people think i’m really strong, he’s the one that holds me tight in the middle of the night when I have a dream about my mom or brother(both passed away)

I guess we do find the person when we need them the most.  My mom always said that about my dad…. and he about her.

Post # 9
Member
2167 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@TorTor09:  Thanks for the support…it it definitely not easy and its something you have to work on every single day,  but SO and I have each other to lean on. We both know the consequences are too much if a relapse were to happen. 

Post # 10
Member
2167 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@HisIrishPrincess:  I absolutely agree…there is a force out there way bigger than you and I or anyone else. It was more than a coincidence that my SO and I found each other at the exact point in our lives when we probably would never have made it going forward alone. 

Post # 11
Member
4605 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

FH and I have talked about it before. A few months before we met FH was planning on taking a traveling welding job and essentially never coming back to Alabama, so he’d be long gone in some other state by now if we hadn’t reconnected with each other when we did. As for me, I don’t know. I had thought about moving to another state myself, mainly Colorado, so I’d probably be there if I didn’t have him. 

Post # 12
Member
9115 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

My husband is a “wingit” kind of guy. He’d probably be just like he is now… except hungrier and lonlier. I don’t really think our relationship or our marriage really changed much in the way of his lifestyle.

Post # 13
Member
258 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

He’s sitting next to me right now, so I thought I would ask him – his answer “lonely and depressed.” Awww. He would still be living in the city, away from his family. Most likely drinking every weekend, flatting with 4 other people and still working somewhere that his potential wasn’t being shown.

We’ve got it pretty good at the moment. He’s the Head Chef at a top restaurant, living by ourselves in a lovely little rural  – a few km’s away from both our families 🙂

Post # 14
Member
9952 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

Before me…

Mr TTR was doing a lot of the things he does now with me in his life.

Working full time, playing hockey, hanging out and entertaining dear friends… enjoying his hobbies that include music, food & wine

He’d be dating someone… because he is naturally the type of guy that doesn’t go too long before some woman comes into his life

BUT he’d be quick to admit that since he met me things are different.

BECAUSE, I am different

I don’t hassle him about being WHO HE IS

I don’t freak out that he plays a lot of hockey, bangs away on his instruments into the wee hours, or hangs out with his guy friends doing guy things watching sports at our local sports bar, or going on guys weekends / weeks for golf etc

He says all the women he dated before me (and some marriages) wouldn’t let him be him.

Past relationships didn’t like that he played so much hockey (he was semi-pro for awhile)… or that he likes to spend weekend nights in the basement on his drums / guitars… or that he goes to the Pub to watch Hockey… or away on Guys Only Trips

In reality… he treats me like a Princess… and we have a fantastic relationship because he equally lets me be me

We are together almost 24/7… and I know that I can trust him a million times over… he just is an honest upright kind of guy

He has never denied me to come along on any of his adventures… I’m free to go watch him play hockey any time I want… or hang out with him and “the guys” at the Pub (sometimes we do do that… he’ll say “you should come up to the pub tonight”).  Or even go on his Golf Journeys with him… although I’d never do that to him (mind you he’d be ok if I did… )

Without me in his life, he’d probably travel less (we both love to travel)… and he never would have bought the sportscar which we love so much

Lol, and a Cruise & Tuxedo no doubt wouldn’t be part of his lexicon…

But then again, I’d be a whole other person too.  And I have to say, as much as I am who I am … I am grateful for who I am now with him.

Lol, and as of just a mere few days / weeks ago… I am proud to say that is MRS TTR

 

Post # 15
Member
112 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

He’d be the next 40 year old virgin if it weren’t for me. 

Post # 16
Member
1856 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

He’d still be totally awesome. I don’t think he’s changed who he is since we’ve been together – although now he’s a dad and he can hold up a conversation about my field of research, I guess. In terms of personality, lifestyle, goals, etc, he’s still exactly who he was when I met him, which is good because I liked him then for a reason.

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