(Closed) What you would have/wouldn’t have done…

posted 8 years ago in Beehive
Post # 3
Member
10218 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2010

Okay honestly I am not married yet, but after having to move my wedding up since my dad is sick within 8 weeks from today, I think it’s the best thing I have ever done. My priorities are very much in line and honestly I am definitely not struggling with the little details. It is all about the big picture right about now lol!! And since I don’t have that much time, I also don’t have that much time to go over budget. I pay for what I can afford and move on.  My parents are gratious enough to cover some of the expenses but that’s it.  I honestly sat down for a few hours today while on the way to my hometown and just wrote everything that was important to me for the wedding. There are a few novelty items like the wax seals that my mom and I will try tomorrow but that’s it.  Everything else is pretty cut and dry.  Remember the only things that you need to be his wife are him, you, and the officiant.  The rest is fluff.  Albeit gorgeous fluff, but still fluff none the less.

Post # 4
Member
3316 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

My biggest advice is to assume that at least five things will go wrong on your wedding day.  That way, when something does, you can tell yourself, “Well, that’s one of them out of the way!”, instead of, “OMG, this is a disaster!”  That attitude will help a lot more than any particular detail that you could add/subtract.

Post # 5
Member
1801 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I’d pretend that Thursday is the last chance to do things.  The day before our wedding was one of the worst days of my life.  I was rushing, stressed, upset, behind on the to do list, it goes on and on.  I’d go back and have more things done Thursday and make Friday much more open. 

As for the actual wedding, I wish we had done the cake cutting after some dancing rather than right after dinner.  It was a little awkward and I felt like people were still eating.  I’d also have taken my shoes off much earlier because I hurt like crazy the next day!

Post # 6
Member
1222 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

@2dBride: Thank you for sharing that! I try to think, “Okay, something WILL go wrong & there’s nothing you can do about it”. But I do think it’s more realistic to brace yourself for more than one thing to go wrong ๐Ÿ™‚

Not in the “married” boat yet…but I would definitely have waited to pick my bridal party. I picked my girls more than a year in advance & so much drama has happened, it’s pathetic (out of 4 girls, I only have 1 original party member). I would advise other women to wait til like 6-7 months before the wedding before picking your ladies & asking them.

Post # 7
Member
3344 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I wish I would have had time to look in a mirror before portraits.  I was sweaty and didn’t like how my bangs were orientated.

If you have given your vendors a timeline or any sort of guidelines (shot list for photog.), don’t assume that they remembered to bring it with them! Bring extra copies of everything!

I wish I had smiled more during the ceremony.  I was so stressed about my fail photographer that I didn’t smile very much.  I look pensive and stressed out in most photos.

I wish I hadn’t carried my flowers so high when I walked down the aisle.

Have your dress hemmed on the short side.  My dress was a tad long (it brushed the floor) and I had a handful of it in one hand at all times.  As a result, one side of my dress was all bunched up in photos.

I wish the photographers would have asked people who were not supposed to be in group portraits to move out of the way.  We have a bunch of great group photos but there are random people in the background drinking beers or looking inquisitive.

I chose to get a hotel room the night before the wedding and have all my girls stay with me and get ready together in the morning.  This was awesome.

I did not sleep the night before the wedding.  I was too excited! I wish I had taken a sleeping pill or something. 

Post # 8
Member
1020 posts
Bumble bee

things that i’m glad i did:

1. i was sober the whole night which is a great thing! i have very clear memory of my wedding day!

2. hired a DOC. i didn’t think i need one but i’m glad i had one or else i wouldn’t know how i was to execute things when i was busy taking photos and socializing..etc.

3. had a small wedding. i only had 60 guests. everyone invited were people that we had some kind of history with, so it made the wedding very intimate.

4. said tons of “thank you” to my bridesmaids, photographer, videographer, DOC, even the hotel staffs. i was told by one of my bridesmaids that i’m the most polite bride she’s ever seen. to me, since it makes people happy when they feel appreciated, so why not do it? ๐Ÿ™‚

 

my “should haves”

1. should have rented light pink table linens: i went with ivory linen and ivory overlay supplied by my venue but didn’t realize now YELLOW their “ivory” overlay looks until the day of the wedding…….

2. should have taken more photos of just the two of us inside our wedding chapel after the ceremony. we only had 30min after our ceremony before the next wedding start using the chapel. i thought 30min was more than enough because we had done our first look and had done taking photos with our bridal party. what i didnt expect was guests waiting to take photos with us at the chapel. so most of our time was spent taking photos with our friends USING THEIR OWN CAMERAS rather than taken by our photographer.. don’t get me wrong, i did enjoy taking photos with everyone. i just wish i had more time with my hubby for photos inside the chapel.

3. should have hugged my dad after he gave me to my hubby and should have hugged him after father/daughter dance……. ๐Ÿ™

4. should have exercised my face in between photos. i didn’t do that and am now worried that my face/smile would look numbed in professional photos since i was smiling the whole day.

Post # 9
Member
277 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I really wish I tested out my dress more after alterations.  I got it back and shipped it to my in laws the same day.  On the day of I thought I didn’t need to wear a bra since it was fine at alterations but after about 15 mins my boob and dress was falling.  I spent the whole night holding my boobs up and I asked by bridesmaid to tighten the corset so much that I have backfat in all my photos.  that’s the only major thing I regret.

Other small things is that I wish I spent more time and taken more photos with people who travelled to be there.  I got so caught up in the dancing that I forgot I had a photographer and to stop and take pictures with guests.

I also kind of (only a little bit) regret that we didn’t have a videographer.  Someone actcidently recorded 3 seconds of my BIL and brother doing a dance off and it looked awesome!  I wish we had recorded that.

 

Things I’m glad i did:

I’m really happy I kept to my “it’s my wedding and I can do anything I want” everything was so special.

I’m glad I got uplights.  It really changed the mood of the room.

I’m glad that I try to keep the big picture in mind and told myself things that could go wrong.  It really help me keep clam the day of since I already pictured the worst and thought of what I would do in those cases so when little things happened it didn’t seem that big of a deal since the worst did not happen.

Post # 10
Member
721 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I’m getting married in 8 days, but here are a few thoughts I’ve had

I’m so happy I got everything done in advance.  This is my to-do list for the week: Final meeting with venue, final dance lesson, rehearsal dinner!  No DIY projects, no last-minute alterations.  I am so relaxed and calm and just ready for it to be here.

If your hotel block has an attrition (you have to pay if you don’t book all the rooms), err on the side of caution.  We expected way more people to stay over, and it was a source of stress until we met the minimum.  We BARELY met the minimum.  I wish we had just blocked fewer rooms and people would have been out of luck if it booked up.

Don’t send your invitations out too early.  We sent them out 2.5 months in advance and people thought they had plenty of time to RSVP, so many forgot to send them in.  I know you’re excited about them, but try to wait til the 8 week mark.

And some tips from my sister’s wedding (I was her MOH): smile when you’re walking down the aisle.  The whole time!  Yes, it’s awkward but your pictures will be so much better.  Hold your bouquet at your naval.  I see SO many brides with it up by their neck lol.

Post # 12
Member
7695 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

– I would have spent more time taking pictures with guests who were not family as now I dont have any pro-pictures with them

-I would have seen our ceremony arbor before our ceremony (was NOT pleased with how it looked at all)

-I would have put my foot down about the decor that I did see in our reception

-I would have spent a little less time on the dance floor and more time going  around to different parts of our reception – I didnt hang out in the bar area or get a drink from the bar even once!

-I would have held my ceremony just a little earlier so that we could have had a little more time for pictures and possibly still been able to go to cocktail hour

-I would have given the photographer a specific shot list because they didnt get any pictures during our cocktail hour and missed some of the small details that went overlooked

Post # 13
Member
806 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Give a lot of thought to giving the guests a great experience.  Focus your budget on these things.

DON’T stress over anything that could be considered a “detail.”  If it’s causing you stress it’s just not worth it since these types of things only matter to you.

Without going overboard, give family members a schedule in writing that tells them when/where you want them to show up.

Pack an “emergency” kit with lots of safety pins and band aids!

 

 

Post # 14
Member
335 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I JUST GOT MARRIED LAST WEEK AND THE THINGS THAT STICK OUT MOST IN MY MIND ARE:

TAKE OFF FROM WORK AT LEAST 1 WEEK BEFORE YOUR WEDDING!  I ONLY TOOK OFF THE 2 DAYS BEFORE AND I COULDN’T GET EVERYTHING DONE THAT WAS NEEDED…I WAS SUPER STRESSED OUT AND SLEPT MAYBE 8 HOURS TOTAL THE 4 DAYS BEFORE THE WEDDING.  I WAS RUNNING AROUND LIKE A CHICKEN WITH ITS HEAD CUT OFF….EVEN WITH HELP…YOU NEED AT LEAST 1 WEEK AS SO MANY LAST MINUTE THINGS COME UP.  THIS IS MY BIGGEST REGRET OF ALL!

THE BEST THING I DID WAS TO GET A DOC!…MONEY WAS SUPER TIGHT SO I HAD DECIDED TO GO WITHOUT ONE.  FORTUNATELY, MY MIND WOULDN’T LET IT GO AND GOT ONE JUST 1 WEEK BEFORE THE WEDDING….I SWEAR, THIS WAS THE BEST BEST BEST DECISION I MADE.  SHE WAS AWSOME AND I COULD NOT IMAGINE WHAT WOULD HAVE HAPPENED IF SHE WASN’T THERE.  FOR EXAMPLE, SOME PEOPLE TRIED STEALING MY SWAROVSKI CRYSTAL PENS AND SHE TRACKED THEM DOWN, SHE PREVENTED PEOPLE FROM TAKING OUR CUSTOM MADE DAMASK TABLE RUNNERS AND HANGING CRYSTALS FROM OUR CENTERPIECES.  SHE WAS ON TOP OF EVERYTHING!  DABBING MY FACE, FIXING MY HAIR THROUGHOUT THE NIGHT, BRINGING ME DRINKS AND WATER TO MAKE SURE I DIDN’T DRINK TOO MUCH…AND I COULD GO ON AND ON.  SHE WAS WORTH EVERY SINGLE PENNY AND THEN SOME! (SORRY FOR THE CAPS, MY BUTTON IS STUCK)

Post # 15
Member
4547 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I”m so glad we did a first look! It gave us amazing pictures, was a very special moment for us, gave us time just the two of us, AND we took awesome photos before the wedding! This gave us a LOT more time to enjoy our private cocktail hour with our bridal party!

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