(Closed) What’s proper wediquette?

posted 13 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
123 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2021 - Outdoor ceremony, banquet hall reception

I don’t think so.

The fact that he sent the gift so far in advance from the actual wedding makes me think that he doesn’t expect to be invited. Otherwise, wouldn’t he have sent the gift closer to the wedding day? After receiving an invitation?

I would send a very nice thank you, and leave it at that.

Post # 4
373 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2021

i ran into this a few times, and I think a lovely hand written note will suffice.  You don’t need to alter your guest list to add someone because they sent you a gift  (unless you truly want to extend the invite).  I had a few people who just really wanted to send a cute little wedding gift.


Post # 5
3340 posts
Sugar bee

I usually send a gift early if I’m not able to attend.  I would write a thoughtful hand-written thank you.  I’m a big believer in the idea that invites do not equal gifts (and thus you shouldn’t expect gifts from those invited either!).

Post # 6
699 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

No invite is necessary.  We had people buy us gifts that we had not even thought of inviting – mostly people we worked with and in a few instances parents of our students.  Sending a gift is their way of congratulating you and it does not mean that they expect an invitation.  A thank you note should suffice, and perhaps after the wedding you could send them a wedding picture. 

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