(Closed) What’s the dumbest conversation you’ve ever overheard?

posted 8 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 92
Member
1766 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I once overheard a conversation on a train where one girl told the other about the future plans she had made with her boyfriend. The girls were about 16 years old.

“Well, we decided that a year into our marriage, we will have twins. One boy, one girl. I’m so glad we’re on the same page about that!”

And did Babies R Us get your order right?

Post # 93
Member
1277 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

OMG I am so loving this thread….thanks ladies for making my Friday….keep them coming….

Post # 94
Member
3667 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

This thread is hilarious. I am cracking up at every single one of these stories!

My dad calls me once –

Dad: Are you near your computer?

Me: Yeah, why?

Dad: I need you to check what time this concert starts.

Me: Okay.

Dad: Go to Google and do a search for – are you ready? – “www.ticketmaster.com” …it should be the first one that comes up.

Me: …Um, you know if you already have the URL, you can just type that in the browser directly instead of searching for it on Google.

Dad: Are you serious? I thought you have Google it first!

ROFL… he’s technologically challenged 🙂

 

 

Other stories:

-Once at the Van Gogh Museum in Amsterdam, I saw a guy trying to pay admission with American money and arguing with the woman who worked there when she told him she could only accept Euros…

-Overheard on my college campus: “Dude, I karaoked so hard last night I chipped a tooth on the mic!”

Post # 95
Member
7899 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

On a bus on the campus of one of the nation’s top public universities, I heard one student ask another what the plural of phenomena was.

Post # 96
Member
1811 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I was on the bus back to the train station from Stonehenge…f*cking STONEHENGE and the girl behind me was on her phone with her mom and said “oh, we just went to…hey honey, what was that place called…no, that’s not it…you know momma that big rock thing in England.”

This (while not the most attractive picture of me) was my actual reaction

Post # 97
Member
7899 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

I actually participated in this, but it’s just priceless. I waas proctoring an exam when I was a grad student for a lecture class. The rule is that we can not answer questions about the questions (so we can deal with something like, there are two c’s or no number 31, but we can’t clarify a question or tell you if you are on the right track, etc.). So this girl raises her hand and I walk over. The question is T/F, and something like “During mummification, the liver is removed and discarded.”

Student: What does “discard” mean.

Me: I can’t tell you that.

Student: Why not?

Me: Because you’re in college, and you took the SAT. That’s a 5th grade vocab word.

She looked at me like I was the meanest person in the entire world, but seriously, DISCARD. Not to mention, I can’t answer questions about the questions.

Post # 98
Member
569 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Me: “…so because we’re different religions, we obviously can’t get married in a church.”

Friend of a friend (who already knew what religions we are): “Well, I’m sure if you just explained…”

Me: “Erm, explained what?”

Her: “Well, you know, if you just explained things, I’m sure it would be fine.”

Me: “I’m Jewish – no offence but I’m not really looking to get married in a church.”

Her: “Well, I’m sure if you just explained things.”

Me: “…”

*

Friend (who was pregnant at the time): “Well obviously I’ll speak French to my baby.”

Friend’s co-worker: “Really? Why?”

Friend: “You do know I’m from France, right?”

Co-worker: “But why would you speak French to your baby?”

Friend: “Because I’d like him or her to learn French.”

Co-worker: “Why?”

*

I used to work in a clothes shop and once had this conversation with a customer.

Customer: “Why do you put the security tags through the clothes? They make holes!”

Me: “I’m sorry for any inconvenience but unfortunately the security tags are needed to deter shoplifters.”

Customer: “But why don’t you just put them through the wash labels where they won’t damage the clothes?”

Me: “Well, sadly that makes it too easy to remove them. Rest assured we do take them out as carefully as possible.”

(Five minutes later)

Manager: “I’ve just had a complaint from a customer who says you’ve accused her of shoplifting.”

Me: “…”

Manager: “Just apologise – I don’t want her complaining to head office.”

Me: “I’m sorry if you felt I was accusing you of anything. I can assure you that wasn’t my attention.”

Customer: “Yes, well, I think you should go on a customer service course.”

You have no idea how much self-control it took to stay quiet and take that one.

Post # 99
Member
1006 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I overheard my coworker ask another coworker if they speak Spanish in Spain. I literally face-palmed myself.

I was complaining to my mom that changing my last name was expensive (new driver license, passport etc) and she said “well does it cost less if you just change your last name instead of hyphenating?”

Me: yes mom, they charge by the letter.

Post # 100
Member
567 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

A gentleman (and I use that term loosely) told the judge today in court that the reason he missed his last court date was because his baby momma wouldn’t give him rides no more. 

Another guy this morning told the judge that his girlfriend done promised to pay his fines. 

Post # 101
Member
1302 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Yesterday I was in a restaurant.  The woman at the table next to us couldn’t remember what she wanted to order, so she asked her date to remind her.  Then she apologized to the waitress by explaining that it was her first time.

Really?  Your first time in a restaurant??

Post # 102
Member
231 posts
Helper bee

In college i went to a friend’s house who had a sister in high school. We were talking how the fourth was coming up…

girl: when is the fourth of july?

me: it’s next thursday.

girl: no, i know but like when is it, like the date?

me: its the fourth of july.

girl: i know, i know….but what like date is it?!

me: july fourth.

girl: oh okay. 

Post # 103
Member
613 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2014 - Historic cinema

In a public toilet once a gaggle of teen girls were discussing a boy one of them had a crush on and her dilemma over how she should act around him.

Her friend’s advice?

“Just talk to him like he’s a person”

Pretty sure they heard me giggling from my stall!

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