Post # 1
I want to make sure this is anonymous so the new account…
My sister is depressed and I think has been to some extent since we were teenagers. She is the smartest person I know and achieved a lot academically and professionally. She’s kind and funny. She’s beautiful (though she plays it down). And yet, she has no friends, doesn’t date, and closes herself off from nearly everyone but immediate family. She goes to work and goes home and sleeps. She used to have some hobbies but she stopped them. All she does now is sleep, I think. My mother told me she was having panic attacks. She never complains or says much about how she feels, she just seems empty. She can barely hold a conversation anymore when I call. She always sounds like she has been asleep or crying.
She is a wonderful sister. I look up to her and I love her. She is being so supportive of my wedding. She is actually paying for some relatives flights because its a destination they cant afford…She is just sweet like that.
I just want her to be happy but it seems like something is deeply wrong. I know she has done therapy and meds and quit both. She said this is just how she is but I want her to feel better. She told me a few weeks ago she is just “making it through the days” and that is all she can hope for. I think that is an awful way to live life.
What can I do?
Post # 3
What you described definitely sounds like depression. If you told her that you were concerned, would she be receptive?
Post # 4
There is little you can do. You can tell her your worries and encourage her to see someone, but you cant “do” anything.
You can try to pull her out of her room, to go out, to meet new people, to go for walks, but true depression needs more than a caring sister.
Post # 5
Thanks for responding. I have told her my concern and she just responds that this is the way she is and that its ok. I dont think its ok. My mom doesnt think its ok. But she tells us she is fine, that this is just her.
I try to talk to her, just to make chit chat and she tells me she is tired and has to go. Or sometimes she doesn’t answer and I know she is home. When I ask her how she is feeling she tries to change the subject, usually to the wedding or me. Its like she is pushing me away.
Post # 6
Try to be there for her as much as you can. Let her know that you are there for her to lean on. Hopefully she will open up to you even if she decides not to seek professional help. Hopefully she will seek help if you talk to her. Don’t push too hard if she refuses. From personal experience with my sister I know that people will often go into denial about depression and other anxiety disorders.
Best of luck to you and I hope things work out well.