(Closed) What’s your biggest wedding REGRET?

posted 9 years ago in Married Life
Post # 47
Member
1412 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

It is really interesting to read everyone’s experience and advice in this threat. I especially now will pay careful attention to who we get as a photographer–as this thread shows, who you get really can make a difference in how happy you are with your photos! 

Post # 48
Member
1501 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

The biggest thing is we didn’t get a lot of the photos we wanted. Myself and DH had spent time before the wedding making a list of certain people to have pictures with which I typed out to give to the wedding party. Instead of someone watching to make sure we got the photos on the list my Maid/Matron of Honor came up to me and asked if we had got all the shots, I had no clue everything was just a blur. So I wish I had picked someone else to make sure we got these shots.

 

Post # 49
Member
5669 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

I loved our wedding, the church, the venue, my dress, flowers, etc.

But I have two regrets that still bug me when I think about our wedding:

1) Choreographed dance. Terrible idea. I forgot everything so my first dance with DH looks terrible on video and I asked my dad not to do the dance that we practiced because I forgot it and he didn’t listen and the whole time I look very pissed at him. He wasn’t even leading, the dance looks so bad and worse is that I didn’t even smile for one second because I was upset and embarrased.

2) The extra hour. I would have left my guests wanting more instead of wanting to leave before the wedding was over. It was a long day and I made the mistake of buying an extra hour and started to see some guests leave right before we were supposed to have our last dance.

I think it’s funny that most bees commented on their photographer. I got wonderful pictures and a beautiful album, but since I haven’t done much with them I feel like I could have cut back. But then who know, I might have been disapointed if my pictures weren’t so perfect.

 

Post # 50
Member
2259 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Most of my biggest wedding regrets are things I don’t think I could have changed, even if I had a do-over. 

 I wish I didn’t look so sad in some of our first look photos. I cried my eyes out most of the afternoon alone and although I’m an actress and looked happy to everyone else, I can read my own face and know my smiles pre-wedding were not genuine. I felt really abandoned and I don’t think having a wedding party (we didn’t ) would have helped. My ‘best’ friends opted to go to another civil ceremony the week before my date and were late to my ceremony. My mother spent the afternoon running around getting herself ready or getting things ready for guests that I didn’t care about. No one was there for me. After being told time and time again during wedding planning that I would have people there for me, that guests would travel that friends would be there for me that day…. I was trusting and listened to these people, but was devestated when no one showed up for me. I feel like our entire wedding was not a celebration of us at all but a celebration for our guests. Nothing was about us the entire day. It saddens me so much today and especially as I remember how it shouldn’t have been.

 Edit: Also stupidly thinking DH’s family would give us anything. They had promised my family they were going to send us on some kind of a trip since we couldn’t afford a honeymoon. They gave us nothing and I want to kick myself for ever believing such selfish people would give their son anything. 

Post # 51
Member
87 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2006

I would change two things:

1. My dress: While it was very pretty, it wasn’t me. I had doubts about it from the time I bought it to the wedding but I didn’t act on them. Looking back, I wish I had listened to my gut feelings.

2. The photographer: I love my wedding pictures but I wish that our photographer had taken the time to get to know us as a couple so our pictures would better show who we are. 

Post # 52
Member
157 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

Only one regret…….I wished the photographer had taken more pics of my guest dancing and at the tables.

Post # 53
Member
4334 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I’m not sure *how* I would have done this differently, but I do wish that I had had more time to mingle with my guests. We got a LOT of pictures with the Wedding Party after the ceremony, and perhaps we should have cut down on those. (But we rented a limo…and were determined to get every last penny out of it!)

Post # 54
Member
575 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I had an AWESOME photographer, which we did pay a premium for. I just wish I would’ve had a shot list! I read and read about them and dismissed them. I’m from the south where they do bridal portraits, but couldn’t do one cuz I live abroad. I don’t have a single picture of just me that I love; or pics of different angles of my dress. My dress had a beautiful waterfall train and I got no pics of it!! I also should have schedule more time to take pics of the bridal party. We only have a few formal pics right after the ceremony. We did a first look, but only had time for pics of me and DH. We also didn’t get any pics of the food! lol

I think that is about it, I loved everything else. When they say you should splurge of photography, I completely agree!!

 

Post # 55
Member
5982 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

I have two regrets:

1.we did not say our vows. We had a Ketubah made with our vows on it. Our Rabbi read the Ketubah. DH or I didnt say a word during our ceremony except I DO. I kinda wish we had did it different….

 

2.We did NOT do a speech. We had a small intimate wedding (<60 ppl) and talked with everyone individually. We did rounds right before the reception and right befoore we left. I remember speaking to everyone so I guess its not a HUGE deal that  we didnt do a speech but I do kinda wish we did.

Post # 56
Member
202 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

A better DJ, more adventurous wedding photos and better photographer

Post # 56
Member
202 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

A better DJ, more adventurous wedding photos and better photographer

Post # 57
Member
1667 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

my only regret was our DJ, not much we could have done about it since he seemed great at the consult, but he played some of the weirdest, randomest songs. We still rocked out though, but I love music so much, so that made me a little sad.

Post # 58
Member
73 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

As a bride who’s still planning for the big day… I really appreciate this thread.  It’s good to read all of the look backs and make mental notes of things that might be avoidable or things to brace for & remember, so thank you for your honesty ladies!

View original reply
@UpstateCait:  Thanks for the heads up about too many mimosas 🙂 I hope to have one before walking down the aisle, but I’ll keep you in mind when I stop at ONE!

View original reply
@CatyLady:  Just out of curiosity… what didn’t you like about making your own invitations?  I’m in between a DIY invite and ordering… I thought I’d see why you regret going the DIY route.

View original reply
@78h2o:  You are so sweet to write a personal note on each escort card!  Something that I’m sure was really time consuming, but totally worthwhile for EACH of your guests.  I may have to consider doing something similar 🙂

View original reply
@Eva Peron:  We’re considering doing e-save the date to save money, but hadn’t thought about an online RSVP option, something to consider for sure, thanks!

 

Post # 59
Member
260 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I LOVED my wedding day, but there were a few things I would have changed:

1. My dress. I love it to this day, but it was not fitted enough. I must have lost a little weight between the final fitting and the wedding day, because the top kept sliding down and I was messing with it constantly! It was a corset back, and my bridesmaids pulled the HECK out of that thing to try to make it tighter, but it just didn’t work (and you couldn’t see any of the pretty laces because it was pulled so tightly).

2. I wish we would have taken more pictures as a couple. It wasn’t my photographers fault, she defintely wanted to take more, but I had just been hit in the face (or should I say lady parts) with a full blown UTI during our pictures. It was all I could do to plaster a smile on my face, so I asked her to stop while I got some medicine. I wish I would have pushed through to get more shots of me and DH. 

Post # 60
Member
966 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Overall I am very happy with the way things turned out.  However, it is not the wedding I had wanted.  I wanted small, intimate, destination type…I settled on larger and local for my husband’s family.  But I think in the end it reflected us. 

The only thing I actually regret is our photographer did not get a picture of our rings.  She was supposed to get them and apparently never did.  Oh well. 

And if I had known  few months before the wedding that we had extra money to play with (we came in under budget, whoot!) I would have gotten a better DJ.  He was fine, but not great. 

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