(Closed) When and how to start TTC?

posted 4 years ago in TTC
Post # 3
Member
1560 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I’m interested in hearing others’ experiences with this too. My fiance and I decided we will engage in ‘riskier’ behaviors up until our year anniversary, which is when we will start charting and actively trying to conceive if we haven’t gotten pregnant by then. But I imagine it would be strange to not take precautions and plan it out the first time. You are so trained to be careful about these things I’m sure it’ll feel weird lol

Post # 4
Member
3170 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

My husband and I hadn’t really talked about it, we just decided one day that we wanted to start trying. It was pretty weird the first time having sex without protection, thinking that we could actually get pregnant on purpose. Two years into TTC and I know it’s just not that easy. Just figure out when you two think you’ll be ready to bring a child into the world and start trying nine months before then. It will still be spontaneous and fun for awhile but you can’t really help the fact that you are doing it for a reason now.

As for your feelings of fear, that’s totally normal. Trust me. After two years of struggling to get pregnant and crying all the time because it just isn’t working, I still freak out sometimes. It’s scary to think you’ll be completely responsible for another human beings life. But it’s so worth it. You just have to trust that you’ll be fine.

Good luck!

 

Post # 5
Member
1854 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@moonfairie:  

@Equine_Breeder:  

Me and my husband are off birth control, but not actively trying to get pregnant (no charting, no trying to predict Oing, no preseed fertility lube) It’s referred to at Not Trying Not Preventing on a lot of TTC boards(NTNP).

We figure it’s a nice way to segway into TTC. We’re not 100% ready yet, but we’re almost “ready” (is anyone really ready?) and this will help us have a segway before we jump in head first. It hasn’t felt planned so far- just feels like better sex without condoms!

There are some worries on both ends sometimes- we keep VCF in the house in case we know we’re going to be drinking heavily in the next few weeks, or just in case someone has a freakout. We’ve been ok- but just having there is nice. We know we WANT to TTC- but starting out is a bit scary. Exciteing too- but scary.

Post # 6
Member
668 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

We’re going to ttc starting next month. For us, we had a plan when we got married: 5 years and THEN try for kids.

We’re hitting the 3rd year mark this summer, ha.

We at least wanted to wait til we were out of school (We’ll both be graduated in July and August) and the husband had a job- Grad school is expensive!!!

It will put me at 21, him at 28, and we’re looking into purchasing our first home with no debt other than student loans. We just wanted to make sure we were a) financially ready, b) mentally ready, and c) we wanted to enjoy marriage, just the two of us, for a bit.

I’m baby hungry out of my brains right now, though.

In any case, do what’s right for you! If you’re not ready, don’t force it.

Post # 7
Member
3378 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

I think when a lot of people talk about it being spontaneous, they mean that they aren’t doing things like charting, using OPKs (ovulation predictor kits), paying great attention to fertility signs, and are just doing the deed when the mood strikes.  For me, I think DH also wants it to feel more spontaneous, so that means that I’ll still chart and use OPKs and stuff, I just won’t tell him “hey I’m fertile today, put a baby in me!”  I may still initiate sex, but that’s not out of the norm for us.  It just means I’m trying not to make him feel really pressured to perform on certain days of the month.

I get the weird feeling though! We’re not trying yet, but we’ve been talking about it and are likely going to start in the next 6 months or so.  But we’ve started not always using condoms more recently (I’m still on the pill), and that still feels a little weird for me.  We’ve been really careful for so long (almost 6 years), always using two forms of protection, that it’s a real change for my DH especially to not worry as much about being careful.  I think it just takes a little time to readjust your expectations for what’s “normal.” We are both looking forward to the day, though, when we never have to use condoms again 🙂 DH is planning on a vasectomy after we have two kids, and we talk about that glorious day quite often.

Post # 8
Hostess
11336 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

@moonfairie: We’d been thinking about a while and then decided the time is right

Post # 9
Member
937 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@moonfairie:  DH and I have been together for 5+ years and only used condoms very briefly. I have been off BC for 2 years and up until the past 6 months we were just kind of winging it. (Pretty irresponsible, I know.) We weren’t ready to have a child, but I was in the mindset that if God wants us to then that’s what it’ll be. 

Sometime around the holidays I got baby fever and we kind of talked about it and agreed to move from “Whatever happens, happens” to NTNT. I’ve been tracking AF on an app on my phone since I got off of BC so I didn’t have any surprises. That app also list the projected ovulation day based on your cycles. I never paid too much attention to it and we just BD whenever the mood struck. But I also started taking prenatals to give me body a fighting chance in the chance we do get KU. (Also, I’m anemic so the iron and folic acid helps.)

At some point I knew that we’d be wanting to actively TTC soon so I switched up and started charting and tempting using FF. I figured that it would give me a better understanding on how mu body works and what to do/ look for when we were “ready.” I also read “Taking Charge of Your Fertility.” The book really breaks it all town for you. Shortly after that, DH and I were just having a random convo and he agreed he was ready to TTC. 

It’s exciting to actually be TRYING to make a baby…. and DH loves the extra BDing we’ll be doing. lol But I also will not be telling DH all the gory details of my FW and try my best to make it not be too forced and allow it to seem spontaneous for him. 

 

I say all that to say that it was a natural progression for us and I think it made it a bit easier to adjust physically for us.

 

Post # 12
Member
2876 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

we stopped using contraception the day we got married!

i consider not using contraception to be TTC. i know most people think its NTNT or NTNP but i don’t really make the distinction

if we ever decided to start charting and monitoring everything i guess itd be around this christmas?

Post # 13
Member
8 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: November 2013

can someone please explain what TTC is? This is my first time hearing any of this.

Post # 14
Member
668 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

TTC = trying to conceive

Post # 15
Member
3697 posts
Sugar bee

@moonfairie:  Even though you’re not trying to jump the gun, it’s smart to start charting and taking prenatals/folic acid/etc. several months before you start actively trying to conceive.

Starting to chart now/soon will give you several months’ worth of data points and practice at reading your cycles so that you will be comfortable with it by the time it matters. It takes a little time to get the hang of charting, and for the first couple of weeks when you only have a few data points, everybody’s chart looks like a random zigzag. You often need to see a couple of successive months in order to be able to spot your patterns.

And with the vitamins and folic acid, you ideally want to have plenty of reserves of those nutrients already in your body when you conceive. Taking them before you get pregnant/start actively trying helps to prepare your body so that it’s ready when the time comes.

Oh, and BTW, it’s “segue,” not “Segway.” Segway is one of those gyroscopic two-wheeled carts. If you mean a smooth transition, the word you want is “segue.”

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