Post # 1
Hi guys, I’m just wondering if you have advice on when a wedding shower should be held? I’m in doctoral school and very busy and few weekends work for me to have it. My wedding is August 31 and it would have been best for me to have it in march while I was on break but that just seemed too early. We now are thinking of end of April for my mother-in-law (she leaves out of town and wants to throw one there) and May for my family, which will be 4 months before the wedding. Is this too early? How early are you guys doing yours? Also an etiquette question, I read somewhere that immediate family is not supposed to host the shower but my sister is my maid of honor and is planning to have the shower at my parents’ house. Thoughts? Thanks!!
Post # 3
I know etiquette says that immediate members of your family shouldn’t throw showers because it looks gift-grabby. But since your sister is your Maid/Matron of Honor, I personally don’t think it’s a huge issue. She’d be throwing the shower as a Maid/Matron of Honor not as your sister. It won’t matter that it’s at your parents’ house since your mom is not the one hosting (I do think that mom’s shouldn’t host showers).
I’m getting married at the end of September and my shower will be at the end of June – about 3-3.5 months before the wedding. I thought that was a bit early, but it’s what worked best for me. If having your shower 4 months out works best for you, then I think it’s just fine!
Post # 4
I think you should have it whenever you have the time. I am having mine June 9th and my wedding is September 8th. So mine is 3 months before.
I also think it is find if your immediate family throws you the shower. My mom and sisters are throwing mine. In today’s world it is hard to have anyone but your immediate family throw you a shower!
Post # 5
It’s understandable that your family would want to shower you, and it’s normal for them to be involved in the planning of the showers, but to me, the best way I can think of to handle this politely would be to keep the guest list of this shower to family members and friends of the family.
If your personal friends or colleagues want to shower you they or one of your other bridesmaids can always throw you a separate shower.
Post # 6
My wedding seems so far so I haven’t thought about the timing for mine. I just want to say that the whole family not hosting the bridal shower thing isn’t the norm for everyone. Almost every shower I’ve been too the mother, sister, or a family member hosted or cohosted the shower with the bridemaids, and no one blinked an eye.
Post # 7
My wedding is Sept 8th and we are doing my shower the weekend before Memorial Day I think. Lots of friends are getting married this summer so available weekends were at a premium and I felt bad having the shower too close to the actual wedding from a financial standpoint.
Also, my mom and Maid/Matron of Honor are hosting it, with my mother paying for the whole thing. I actually prefer this because now my BMs don’t have to spend money on it themselves. I know people that do it 4-5 months in advance and I think that’s fine!
Post # 8
Have the shower whenever it fits your schedule. Mine is July 28th and my wedding is Sept. 15th. My sister is my Maid/Matron of Honor and is throwing the shower. So I obviously think that’s okay. 🙂
Post # 9
Our wedding is October 6th 2012 and the shower is going on in the begining of June.
Post # 10
I agree with the other posters…I think it’s just when it works best in your schedule. I am having two in one weekend, simply because it’s when my little sister can come into town. She will be able to see family from both sides, so that’s helpful. My first two showers are April 13th and 14th (yep…Friday the 13th!), my work is throwing one on April 26th, and we’re getting married June 23rd. In some ways, it’s almost nicer to have them earlier, because as you get closer to your date, you’re going to be really busy.