(Closed) When can we start using gifts?

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Is it okay to use bridal shower gifts before the wedding?
    Yes : (34 votes)
    74 %
    No : (12 votes)
    26 %
    Other (below) : (0 votes)
  • Post # 3
    15963 posts
    Honey Beekeeper

    We didn’t start living together till we were married, so it was easy for us not to use our gifts till after the wedding. I kinda liked saving it all till we were married, sort of as a celebration of our new life together, and for tradition’s sake. But I certainly don’t think there’s anything wrong with using gifts early.

    Post # 3
    3175 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    As a gift giver, I would want my gift used as soon as it was given. I’m guessing the reason you’re supposed to wait until after the wedding is, in the case that the wedding’s called off, you can return the gifts to the giver…? 

    Post # 4
    4824 posts
    Honey bee

    If it were wrong to use the gift before the wedding, then the tradition would be to send the gifts after the wedding if they werent given on the wedding day or at a bridal shower.

    Post # 5
    955 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2014

    I wouldn’t think that using the gifts prior to the wedding would be THAT big of a deal. Just don’t call off the wedding (ha ha)

    Post # 6
    210 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    Also something to think about is if you need to return a gift, you might only have a certain amount of days after the purchase date. I would be sad to wait to open a gift after the wedding, see that it is broken or something, and it’s past the 90 days to exchange it. Just a thought to keep in mind.

    Post # 7
    107 posts
    Blushing bee

    I think it’s a little ridiculous to wait until after the wedding to start using your gifts. Firstly, the whole point is to help the couple get their new life started, not to have stuff sit unused in boxes for weeks. Secondly, how the heck would anyone know if you’re using it or not prior to the wedding? Go for it!

    Post # 8
    5977 posts
    Bee Keeper

    We were in the same boat as Gemstone – we weren’t living together before we were married, so we didn’t use any of our gifts before we were married. I’m not sure if this is regional, but we were always told that it was bad luck to use the gifts before you were married. My younger brother and future SIL were also under the same impression.  

    Post # 9
    15963 posts
    Honey Beekeeper

    @2PeasinaPod:  Yeah, I’ve always heard it as one of those bits of wedding superstition.

    Post # 10
    887 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2010

    The way I was raised was that you can use the gift after you’ve written a “Thank you” for it! So if you’ve sent out your ‘thank you’s’ for your bridal shower, I say go for it!

    Post # 13
    1375 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    It is fine to open them to make sure that the gifts work/are all in one piece.  However, etiquette says that all wedding gifts (shower and wedding, not engagement party) must not be ‘used’ until after the wedding, just in case, God forbid, the wedding does not occur.  If that happens, the bride and groom must return the gifts to the givers.

    The topic ‘When can we start using gifts?’ is closed to new replies.

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