(Closed) When did you move in together?

posted 4 years ago in 20 Something
Post # 46
206 posts
Helper bee

We agreed it would happen at 3 months, but the place we moved into wasn’t ready until we’d been together around 9 months. But we’re in our 30s and knew what we wanted. I wouldn’t have done that in my early 20s.

Post # 47
9971 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

We moved in together after 8 months, but we had been friends before that.  We also were basically living together before that, but also living in a high cost of living area and paying over 2k each for rent… so economically it also made a lot of sense for us.  We lived together for a couple years before getting engaged, so we didn’t rush anything on that end, and we kept our finances completely separate in case anything happened (we had a ridiculous spreadsheet tracking expenses and would literally write checks to each other to even out household expenses).

Post # 48
147 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

We moved in together after a year, and I was 22 and he was 27. But it was into a condo that he bought on his own. And then last year we bought our house together, I was 24 and he was 29. 

Post # 49
457 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2016

at 22 I think you should date at least a year first – there’s no rush after all. 

Post # 50
1814 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2017 - Pearson Convention Centre

We moved in together and we were married 

Post # 51
1110 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

We moved in at 23/24. Fiance wanted to live at home (rent free) for the first year we were out of college to focus on paying off his student loan. I paid mine off before graduating so I lived alone that year but spent a lot of time with him. We’d been together 3 years at that point.

Post # 53
302 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2018

We moved in together after 9 months. I was 25 and he was 31. Before that we were each living with a roommate, and they were getting a little tired of the extra person in the home! 

Post # 54
210 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

Just before the 1.5 year mark.

Post # 55
1829 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

Right after the year mark. We moved cities and moved in together. 

Post # 56
264 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2019

After 7 months! Our leases were up and it was too convenient. Plus, we spend almost every night together anyway. 

Post # 57
2544 posts
Sugar bee

DH moved in after 5 months officially, but he stopped going home after 3 months – we were 30 and 28. I actually think that’s REALLY fast, but we were already talking about marriage and he apparently already had the ring by the time he moved in – I just told him he couldn’t propose until we’d been together at least a year. 

Just keep in mind that moving in really isn’t the same as just staying at someone’s house every night. You have to share bills and housework and space.You need to be able to communicate very directly and openly about who does what and contributes how or resentment can build quickly. Your lifestyles also affect each other a LOT when you live together – when you get up, when you go to bed, how much tv you watch, how much you drink etc.

It also makes breaking up MUCH more complicated and expensive so you want to be sure you’re serious about a long term future with this person. You can suddenly wind up out on your ass with only half of the things you need to set up house and then you have to find a place to live – and likely pay nearly twice as much rent as you’re used to budgeting for. 

Post # 58
748 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

I would DEFINITELY advise waiting to move in together. I moved in with a couple of ex bfs at about your age and similar situations. We rushed it and it ended terribly both times. My now hubby and I had been together a year and 3 months before he moved in and we were already engaged when we did. He was 37 and I was 35 at the time so we were fast tracking a little.

I would really strongly suggest you spend a couple of weeks away together and see how that goes. It is VERY VERY different living with someone and doing what you guys are doing. 

Post # 59
701 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

We moved in together after getting engaged, when we had been dating for 2.5 years. I was 27 and he was 29. I feel like we were ready at 2 years, but we had to find the right apartment (which took forever because I have a large breed dog) and I wanted to be engaged first. 

Post # 60
813 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

19 days… after two dates and a week in London together I came to visit and never left. I went back to my place 2 times to get my stuff and then one more time to hand in the key. I work from home and we lived about 90 km apart. I wanted to move out of my place anyways. So I figured if it wouldn’t work I’d just move on. Keep in mind we were 35 and 36 at the time and I am European. 

I had two relationships before. One was 6 and one was 7 years. Both times I was sure we’d stay together. But I never even considered moving in together. I had a life. I was young. I went to University. I had a job and friends. We just never considered that option. None of my friends in relationships lived together. We considered ourselves too young to make such an commitment. Again. Talking about Europe (Germany/ Sweden). Also marriage in my circle wasn’t a thing until people started hitting their mid 30ies… 

I’d think about it some more if I were you. And then some more. And then after you went through some more boyfriends… then make a commitment 

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