Post # 1
(cross-posting this from the etiquette boards)
I think too many months in Wedding World has clouded my reasoning skills. My shower’s in a couple months, it’s not a surprise and I’m happy with that. But my Future Mother-In-Law has only ever been to surprise showers and expressed confusion about whether I’ll “make an entrance,” which got ME stressed about it. Suddenly it seems weird that I’ll just be THERE already as the guests come into the party (it’s at a banquet hall), but I’ve never really heard of brides, like, making a grand entrance into their not-a-surpise showers, lol.
I mean, at graduation parties or birthday parties, the guest of honor is usually already there when the guests start arriving — is that how it is with the bridal shower when it’s not a surprise? Or do I show up late? Or what? If I’m overthinking it, please feel free to say so. Like I said, I think Wedding Brain is making me crazy.
Post # 3
I was already there at mine before the guests started arriving. I’m not sure if that is normal, but it’s what I did, but then again, I’m a pretty punctual person.
Post # 4
I showed up 15 minutes after it started. I guess I made a grand entrance, but all the decor and everything else was a surprise to me, which is why I think my sister wanted me there afterwards.
Post # 5
Hide in a storage closet until everyone gets there and jump out and surprise THEM! Turn the tables a bit 😛
I’m just kidding, in case you didn’t see my sarcasm font. I think it would be ok if you were already there, it isn’t a surprise shower so I don’t think anyone would make a big deal out of it. Besides, you get to make a “grand entrance” at the wedding!!
Post # 6
I showed up 15-20 minutes into the party
Post # 7
In my experience with non-surprise showers, the bride is usually there the whole time, greeting the guests as they arrive.
Post # 8
It depends what you’d prefer: to greet each guest as they arrive, or to make a grand entrance.
Personally, I’m on the shy side, so a shower in my honor is enough attention in and of itself. I’d rather not add to that with an entrance lol. I also like the idea of greeting my guests as they arrive, it seems more grateful (this is just my opinion for my own shower, I wouldn’t think anything of a bride who chose an entrance).
Post # 9
It doesnt have to be a surprise, it all depends on what you want.
Post # 10
Thank you so much for the input, ladies, it was all extremely helpful! I think what I’m getting from this is to ask my bridesmaids (who are hosting) when they want me to show up. Like mwitter80, the decor (and pretty much everything besides the date and place and guest list) is going to be a surprise, so I’m thinking they’ll probably want me to show up a bit late. But I’ll wait and see what they recommend.
Post # 11
I got to mine early to make sure I was there as guests arrived and to have a few minutes to take in and appreciate the food/decor/everything my hostesses had done for me. It worked well for us!
Post # 12
@AliceandtheOwl: I wondered about the same thing! My Maid/Matron of Honor told me to just show up early and I could see everything decorated and then talk to everyone as they arrive. It turned out great! I was able to say to hello and visit with everyone for a few minutes.
Post # 13
I’d say be there before it starts to greet the guest as they walk in. I once went to a non-surprise babyshower and the mother didn’t show up until about 20-30 minutes after it started. Everyone was kind of sitting there like “Where the heck is she?!?” If it was a surprise it would have been totally different. Also, the longer it takes you to get there the longer it takes for the shower to get started / your guest to eat / etc.
Honestly, no one likes wasting a whole day sitting at a wedding shower while you open gifts. Showers are boring (everyone knows this right?!? lol!) I personally think you need to get in, eat a nice meal, mingle, play a game or two and get your guests out. Therefore showing up after your shower has already started is slightly weird to me. IMO. Maybe it’s different in other states? idk 🙂