(Closed) When do you unfollow/delete sibling's exs on social media?

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: When do you delete siblings exs?

    Right after they broke up

    I wait for them to do it first

    After the sibling has started dating someone else

    Never/they get deleted within the next cleanse

    Other/comment

  • Post # 32
    Member
    7887 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    As long as everyone’s respectful, I don’t think it’s a big deal to keep connected on social media. If your sibling specifically had a problem with it, I’d be ok with unfriending though. 

    Post # 33
    Member
    1117 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    My siblings have only ever dated (and broken up with :/) friends of mine. So I have remained friends both on facebook and in real life with all of them, and have introduced a new family rule that if you’re going to date a friend of mine you’d better be okay with me staying their friend once you break up with them. 

    Post # 34
    Member
    533 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2016

    View original reply
    gogglefruits:  Lol. Embarrassing right? I didn’t know what I’d done till he started showing up in my feed again. 

    View original reply
    aussiemum1248:  Except I don’t recall asking for any help in making a decision about deleting him though thanks for the advice, have a lovely day! 🙂 

    Post # 35
    Member
    1991 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    I normally don’t delete them.  

    Post # 36
    Member
    7638 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    View original reply
    windowlulu:  OK, I’m sorry. So I’ll restrict myself to replying to your comment: You said you feel like a douche for thinking of deleting him. Let me assure you that you are not a douche if you delete him. (And he is a douche if he gets upset if you delete him).

    Post # 37
    Member
    892 posts
    Busy bee

    just unfollow them, they’ll probably never notice. it’s a great alternative to unfriending. 

    Post # 38
    Member
    2403 posts
    Buzzing bee

    I haven’t read the comments, but I don’t unfriend my sibling’s ex’s. If I would say “hi” to them in the grocery store (which in all cases I would) then I see no reason to “internet ignore” them. I don’t purposefully engage with them (unless we were friends outside of their relationship with my sibling), but I wouldn’t go out of my way to delete them.

    Post # 39
    Member
    13722 posts
    Honey Beekeeper

    View original reply
    windowlulu:  That question was from the OP. I do agree with 
    View original reply
    aussiemum1248: though. An ex can   perfectly well understand why he’s being deleted. If you run into him, you can always handle it with humor and explain how you “accidentally”  friended him.

    Actually, adding someone by mistake can happen. Not a coincidence by FB design.  

    Post # 40
    Member
    380 posts
    Helper bee

    View original reply
    windowlulu:  I did something similar to this too! I had unfriended my brother’s ex, but we have one shared fb friend so she showed up in my feed. I briefly stalked her page out of curiosity and accidentally hit the friend request button when I was scrolling on my phone. I didn’t realize it until my husband texted me like, “It says you and _____ became friends?” (It showed up on his feed.) So embarrassing. I waited a few days and unfriended her again. 

    Post # 42
    Member
    484 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2016

    My Fiance and I broke up for about a year (amicably, just wrong place, wrong time). And his brother deleted me IMMEDIATELY. It really cemented that he doesn’t much care for me. And then was suuuuuuper awkward when 4 years later I had to re-add him to tag him in family vacation photos. 

    I know it might seem like they’re done for good, but if she’s not terrible on FB or something, I’d keep her as a friend just in case. No need to create bad blood.

    Post # 44
    Member
    591 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2017 - France

    I pretty much leave it up to the person, if I get along fine with the person it makes no sense for me to delete them just because my sister or brother is no longer with them. I am very selective in who I request or accept as friend as well.

    Post # 45
    Member
    1292 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2019

    I’ve only ever added one of my brother’s girlfriends on FB, and when I finally decided to do it they broke up THAT DAY. Super awkward in my opinion. I waited months before I deleted her because I was embarrassed.

    If his future girlfriend(s) aren’t someone I’m friends with already then I would probably delete fairly quickly after they broke up. It just seems like an excuse for me to peek in on them or for them to get breadcrumbs of my brother otherwise.

    I certainly wish my own brother had the same idea about this because he was still friends with my ex-FI on FB for almost a year and it made me super uncomfortable when he would ‘like’ something on his page. The break up was earth shattering for me and I feel like in that case you should be on the side of your sibling.

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