Post # 76
queensav : I feel like maybe if i just hold on until things settle a bit more then everything will be ok
Bee–the world is going to continue moving forward, you are both going to continue being busy–it doesn’t stop. How long are you willing to hold on? He could order a ring online in five minutes if he wanted to order a ring. A man who wants to get married will propose. A man who wants to get married doesn’t refuse to discuss and plan a future with you. At least set a deadline for yourself. You deserve more than this.
Post # 77
Reading through the comments by Bees to your latest update, OP, this is so empowering.
Take their wisdom, strength and move on. It doesn’t matter how good the “good times” are, no-one should ever let you feel so devastasted and down.
Post # 78
Lots to think about, Bees! I truly appreciate everyone taking the time to comment and give their perspectives – that is why I posted, for advice, support, and a bit of tough love. I was feeling very low yesterday, but I am stronger today. I have decided to wait until October as originally planned and see where we are then. I have said all I can say to him at this point, so I dont feel like another conversation about a timeline will be productive – he knows where I stand. I want to be engaged, but I will not nag someone into proposing and moving our lives forward. I am prepared to have a difficult conversation come October if need be. There is a measure of peace in that realization. For the time being I am choosing to focus on my own mental and physical health, which has been greatly neglected.
Thanks again for everyone’s contributions. I will keep y’all updated no matter the outcome, since I always hate when someone posts and then disappears.
Post # 79
queensav : that’s good, Bee. I hope you will also take the time between now and October to start planning your life without him. You won’t be able to make the break if you can’t event think about it, let alone make a plan. Even if you don’t need or use that plan, you should start visioning a life that can fulfill and excite you without him in it, otherwise, you run the risk of looking up and realizing it’s October 2020 and you are in the same place (which a lot of other posters have done) but sadder and angrier (and even less of an option for a potential new partner).
Post # 80
queensav : start making plans to leave. He’s a dick at this point.