(Closed) when i married you i married your mom too?

posted 9 years ago in Married Life
Post # 3
2340 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I think we need more information about the context. This could mean a lot of things, good or bad, but it depends on the context.

If you’re just talking about in general, I do not really believe you “marry” your in-laws when you marry your SO nor should you expect your SO to “marry” your parents. My number one priority is my husband and I am his.

Post # 4
2469 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

@6598731ssfse3:  +1. I never liked or agreed with the idea that you’re marrying your SO’s family.

Post # 5
4173 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2018


Mr. 99’s parents and family in general are a hoarde of cannibalistic monsters and I’m actually amazed that ANY of the siblings survived since I suspect it’s general practice for them to eat their young after a failed harvest….if anything it would read,

“When I married you, I vow to cleave you away from these psychopaths and show you what a realy functioning family feels liks if it’s the last thing I ever do!”

Post # 6
2265 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@Nona99:  best thing i’ve ever read.


Post # 7
3372 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Maybe to some extent, but I don’t think it means you have to be okay with someone who is rude, intentionally difficult, etc just because they are an in-law. I’m not even okay with someone acting that way when they are a blood relative! I fell in love with Fiance – not his family (though I do love them… haha. I’m lucky) and I don’t think I have to like someone by association.



Post # 8
2469 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

@Nona99:  lmao. Yup, both DH and I come from pretty untraditional families and we’ve vowed to be as normal of a family as possible (which is of course a tall order, but damnit we’re gonna try!)

Post # 9
189 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I hope not! I really do not enjoy my Future Mother-In-Law.

Post # 10
479 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I really, really hope not.


My Future Mother-In-Law is not the most enjoyable to be around, but she lives in another country so even if I am marrying her, at least we will be long distance! :p

Post # 12
4134 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House

@Nona99:  LOLOL 

I kinda agree with him, in that he will never be truly separated from her and will have to work through the good and the bad, but he also doesn’t have to spend that much time with her if you don’t make him

Post # 13
7382 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2011

@subtlebee:  lol That was my first thought too.

No, you’re not marrying the in laws.  Marrying into their family?  Sure, assuming your spouse hasn’t cut ties with them.

Being married to someone vs. marrying into a family are 2 very different things!

Post # 14
1049 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

No, disagree – you marry your SO and shouldn’t have an obligation to his family, unless you want to. Lucky for me though, I love my FMIL!!

Post # 16
699 posts
Busy bee

I say yes.  That’s how I was raised, when you get married, you also marry into the family.  I’m a huge family person and my whole family is and so when someone gets married, we welcome their family in with big giant, open arms.  Now, not all of the cousins know each other’s in-laws but the parents and siblings most DEFINITELY do!

And honestly, if you have a situation that means it’s better if you don’t, that’s fine, but I feel like it helps to establish a better marriage and relationship for everyone involved.

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