When men follow directions down to a 'T'

posted 2 years ago in Home
Post # 91
Member
5916 posts
Bee Keeper

yourhandinmine :  Excellent posts, I fully agree. 

And in the scenario you gave of a man joking about training his wife, I’m sure if he was called on it he would react much the same as some of the Bees on here. Oh would you chill, I was just joking. I love my wife and she made a great supper, but we all have our flaws, she’d be the first to laugh it off, she doesn’t take things so seriously. And probably he does love his wife and probably he did mean it as a joke, but it doesn’t change the fact that it’s a sexist joke that some would find very off-putting. 

Post # 92
Member
7814 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

yourhandinmine :  “There’s a difference between bullying someone to their face at school, and over the internet.

How is this bullying? Her SO is never gonna read this, and even if he did, how do you even know he’d have an issue with it? I could write 9000 stories like the one OP shared here today, and also share them with my Darling Husband, and he would laugh, cause we can both laugh at our own absurdity. 

Also do you never vent to anyone about occasional funny or mildly annoying things your SO does? If you can’t see the difference between humiliating your partner in public in front of your friends, and sharing a laugh online or with girlfriends about something totally harmless that your SO probably would find equally amusing, I really cannot help you here. 

Bullying! You have really taken things to a new level.

ETA: I can understand how the word “training” has an offensive connotation. I just think it’s extreme to act like the OP has committed this grave sexist offense and is bullying her husband because she dropped that word into her post, esp given she acknowledged she could have used a better word later on.

Post # 93
Member
1183 posts
Bumble bee

Meh. I think this thread is all a bit of lighthearted fun! 

First of all, my Fiance is an incredibly intelligent man. Recently I asked him to hang out the washing on the line, so he did. It was a very windy day and later when I went out, our things had blown away. I’m like, didn’t you peg them down!? And he sort of just stood there looking surprised that pegs were a necessity. 

Hes LOLed at me before too of course, I’m terrible with paperwork and filling out forms. 

xo

Post # 94
Member
118 posts
Blushing bee

minimalistbeex : 

My SO can also be a rigid thinker, and he has a brother who is even more so. I also teach a lot of students on the aspergers / asd spectrum, and this sort of thinking is relatively common amongst my kiddos. Since I know a lot of rigid “black and white” or “literal rule following” people, I totally understood your post and cracked up reading it. I 100% feel ya.

Ignore all the drama on this post. People are reading too much into a lighthearted post. 

Post # 95
Member
10675 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

gingerbee1234 :  

Interesting.  My Dh has been showing more concrete thinking recently— he seems to have trouble with abstraction.  He cannot generalize.  If I give him an example of something, he can’t seem to get that the concept can apply to another set of facts.

And hypotheticals—forget it.

He recognizes he’s been depressed and started on meds.  But, due to his age, I have to wonder if there is some organicity.  We’ll be able to start differentiating that after he’s been on meds longer.

I have, at times, wondered about him being on the spectrum, but I don’t know enough.  He doesn’t show much affect in his face and has constricted body language.  But, he’s affectionate with me. He is the least intuitive person I’ve ever known, he just can’t figure people out and really doesn’t care.

Very difficult to communicate right now.

 

 

Post # 96
Member
482 posts
Helper bee

Wow. I saw this post a couple days ago and again today and I had to click and read why it got so many responses! 

I thought it was a funny lighthearted post. I didn’t think it was going to turn into such a hot debate. I saw it as just a brain fart moment where he took her too literal. Not that he’s a man who can’t do basic things for himself and that it’s just going to turn into years and years of this behavior.  I feel like we all have little “wow” moments (from both sides) and the OP just shared hers! 

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