(Closed) When people wear jeans to weddings…

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
46408 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@Tarheelgurl:  In our heart of hearts I think  many of us would love to have a bouncer at the front door to eject those who can’t seem to wear appropriate clothing. Unfortunately, that would make us terrible hosts.

Post # 4
Member
4676 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I come from a jeans + polo shirt = fancy extended family.  My mom would have never let my dad wear jeans, and I will always make my Darling Husband dress appropriately.  I’m sure there were people dresses in less than appropriate wedding attire at my wedding.  Did I really care?  No, I was to busy trying to enjoy my day.  You can’t control what other people wear, but you can learn to look past the little things (because, in the grand sceme of things this is very little), and learn to enjoy everything good around you.  

Post # 5
Member
2448 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I think it’s extremely inappropriate and disrespectful to a couple. I can’t even wear jeans to work (except on fridays) because they’re considered too casual,  I wouldn’t dream of putting them on to attend someone’s wedding. Even if the event is casual, there are so many more appropriate outfits to wear. With that said, I wouldn’t kick a guest out, but I would request that photos of them be taken from the waist up.

Post # 6
Member
1589 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

OK I will start off by saying that it’s EXTREMELY uncommon in my area. I’ve never seen it at a wedding here myself, and I’ve been to a variation of weddings. I have seen it in other states though and admittedly whispered to my best friend about it.

Would I kick them out? No! At at the point the damage is done and I’d rather they BE THERE than to worry about what they’re wearing. 

If this was one of my top 3 concerns I’d be pretty lucky. 

Post # 7
Member
1864 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I can completely understand not wanting guests to wear jeans, but unless you specify black/white tie on your invites, you can’t escort guests off of the property.  That definitely seems rude to me.  Obviously, you wanted them there or you wouldn’t have invited them.  In the long run, does it really matter if a couple guests wear jeans?  

My cousins almost always  wear jeans and tshirts.  I asked them to wear khakis to the wedding and they all cheerfully complied.  On our wedding website, we just had a note that our reception would be at a park and we wanted our guests to be comfortable, but we would prefer no jeans.  Everyone honored that and appreciated the way we asked. 

Post # 8
Member
2076 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014 - British Columbia

As long as they’re not nude nor in speedos, I’m fine with what my guests choose to wear… but this is coming from me, a person who has once contemplated on finding a pair of rhinestone jeans and getting a train sewn on the back of the jeans as an elopement plan, to escape the stress of wedding planning!!

Post # 9
Member
1902 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

When people wear jeans to a wedding…the world doesn’t stop turning.

I understand it being frustrating if there’s a specific dress code and someone isn’t following it, but sometimes people can’t, or just don’t see the point in dressing up too much. And I think it’s far ruder to refuse someone entry to your wedding simply because of what they’re wearing than it is for them to wear jeans in the first place.

My husband’s closest uncle wore trackies to our wedding – he’s very unwell and morbidly obese, so for him to wear a suit, he would need to get it tailored (which he can’t afford). We also had a lot of people wear jeans, and no one cared or thought they were overly out of place. We invited them because they are special people to us; they could have shown up dressed as clowns and they would still have been welcome and warmly greeted by my husband and I.

Post # 10
Member
6015 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

I have only seen people in jeans/jorts at weddings in the south.  I’m from up North and never saw it before one of my cousins got married.  That said we got married in the South, and  one of my cousin’s kids wore jeans, flannel shirt, boots & his cowboy hat.  After I ripped him a new one(he’s 19 and blew off getting a dress shirt), banished him to the back row in any pictures of the whole family, I let it go.   I really only cared about the picture.  He was the only one not in a suit or dress pants and a tie.  He stuck out like a sore thumb and several of my aunts, and my brother’s had words with him regarding how he dressed.   He did come up to me at the end of the night and apologized for the mess he created.  

Post # 11
Member
2076 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014 - British Columbia

@hogoboom2012:  That’s a great idea!

Post # 12
Member
2448 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@HisIrishPrincess:  LMAO  at Jorts. Yeah, we had to specify on our invites that the wedding was black tie because otherwise, as my Fiance said, “we will end up with half our guests wearing jorts and colorful belts with crustaceans embroidered on them”.

 

 

 

Post # 13
Member
4046 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I don’t think its fair to make a blanket statement that its inappropriate. Maybe by etiquette standards or social norms, but each family is different. If someone wore jeans to my wedding, I wouldn’t care, but other brides might. Just depends on circumstance.

Post # 14
Member
9082 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

I would not care. I just want the people I love there. I wouldn’t care if they were wearing a paper bag, I’m not going to judge them by what they wore — That’s not why I love these people, I didn’t invite them so I could see their pretty clothes.

I invited them because they are my friends and family. Knowing someone I care about is there and is healthy enough to be there is more than a gift for me.

Post # 15
Member
21 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I wouldn’t care if someone wore jeans to my wedding as long as they were dressed nicely I wouldn’t think twice.

The obvious choice for me as a female guest would be a nice dress but I asked my fiance what he would wear as a guest and he said he would never wear jeans although he would prefer to lol. He wouldn’t care if anyone wore jeans to our wedding. 

Post # 16
Member
3277 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

My FH and his family all have worn jeans to many weddings. They have millions of dollars. And many other people had on jeans. It was a fancy 30k+ wedding and the bride was happy everyone was there and having a good time. No one would even look twice at someone wearing jeans. I expect many people to wear jeans to my formal wedding. The marriage is the important part, what people wear is the last thing that should be on any brides mind.

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