(Closed) Confused! When should I send STDs?

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: When should I send the STDs?
    6 months ahead : (7 votes)
    37 %
    9 months ahead : (10 votes)
    53 %
    Other : (2 votes)
    11 %
  • Post # 3
    2714 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    As long as it’s not a holiday weekend, or a Destination Wedding (like in Mexico or something) I say 6-9 months. We’re sending ours to all of our guests (OOTs and locals) and all at the same time, just to make things easier.

    Post # 4
    198 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    I would send it to everyone on your guest list. We sent ours about 9 months out since our wedding is during the summer when people tend to travel and we have a lot of Out of Town guests travelling from out of state that will need to book airfare and hotel rooms. I’ve had a few people ask me the date again now that we are 3 months out and ready to send out invites, I’m like look at your STD or the web site. It may have been early for some but i know a lot of other guests really appreciated the notice.

    Post # 5
    2154 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    I think you should send them as soon as you are 118% certain about your date and your guest list. 

    Post # 6
    5118 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I went by the idea 6-9 months, but if you’re havng a Destination Wedding or a holiday weekend wedding, then 9-12.

    Also, be careful with those Save the Dates…as getting one means they really, really should be getting an invite. I think we’ll be sending them to about 75% of the list, the relatives and such that we KNOW will be invited whether the budget fluxuates or not. But those that could even possibly get cut, or those that are being invited out of ‘obligation’ (aka In-laws co-worker friends) won’t be getting 6-12 months notice, just the 2-3 of the invite. 

    Post # 7
    1761 posts
    Buzzing bee

    I had also heard these conflicting things. We are taking the middle ground with 9 months, although we already handed a few out at our engagement party. Our wedding is during one of the busiest times of year in my area, so the hotel situation might be rough.

    Post # 9
    1696 posts
    Bumble bee

    Do consider, if only for a moment, not sending STD’s at all. I think they seem too much like the advanced advertising that the convention trade sends out. And I’ve heard too many sad brides looking at their budget a few weeks down the road and realizing that their inclusivity in sending Save-The-Date Cards has created obligations that they can’t afford to meet.

    Send a sweet hand-written note to any out-of-towners that you absolutely MUST have at your wedding. But for anyone who could send regrets without causing you tears, let them make their decision when they get the invitation.

    Post # 10
    3049 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: January 1991

    I sent mine 4 months beforehand. But I only had 6 months to plan altogether, and engagement pictures weren’t ready before then. I think it was plenty of time for people to get the point that I was getting married. The only downfall is some people already had plans, so they told me once they got the STD that they couldn’t make it. But even when I get Save-The-Date Cards, I don’t plan to go until a month beforhand (unless it’s family) because my life is crazy! 🙂

    Post # 11
    154 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    haha..i just sent mine and I am getting married September 3rd. I had a friend create my design for them and it took her a little while.

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