(Closed) When should you have an engagement party? Two too many?

posted 5 years ago in Parties
  • poll: Is two too many?

    Yes

    No

  • Post # 2
    Member
    866 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2016

    We had two engagement parties. One was in the northeast (where my family is from) and one in the midwest (where my fiance’s family is from). Two parties means twice the presents! Typically engagement parties are within a month or two of getting engaged however. The idea is to invite people to annouce and celebrate your engagement. Some of that has been lost with social media, but I still think waiting until the summer is too long. Many people will have seen the ring/heard the news by then, so the moment is somewhat lost. Congratulations on your engagement!

    Post # 3
    Member
    2076 posts
    Buzzing bee

    Personally, I think engagement parties are ridiculous to begin with.  But I really think two is over the top.

    And unlike what PP said, engagement parties are non-gift giving events.  You may get a nice bottle of wine or a $25 gift card, but presents are not the purpose of this event.

    Also, e-parties should happen very close to the engagement.  To throw an e-party months and months after the engagement actually happened is kind of silly.  At that point the wedding is the primary focus, not your engagement that happened 6 or more months ago.

    Finally, keep in mind that anyone invited to an e-party must also be invited to the wedding so you should probably keep an eye on the guests lists.

    Post # 4
    Member
    543 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2017 - Not sure

    I thought about having an engagement party too at a later date. We wanted to wait for after the holidays and bad weather to make sure our guests would be able to come. Really just an excuse to have a party, honestly. I was hoping we wouldn’t get gifts. I had no idea there was a “proper time frame”! Lol! We were gonna do it in April of 2016, a year before our wedding, when the weather would be nice. Usually, we’d have like 6 snow storms by now so I thought it was a good idea!? But I don’t think two would be all that considering how far apart they’d be, distance wise. I voted yes, but after thinking about it, change my vote 😖

    Post # 5
    Member
    515 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2016 - Cambridge Mill

    View original reply
    TorontoBlondbee:  I think it’s nice to get together with family and friends to celebrate your engagement! Congrats by the way! My bestfriend surprised me by gathering all our friends at a restaurant. I thought it was just her and I going. It was simple and not really a party but it was really nice, and a great excuse to get everyone together.

    I feel like two is too much, it would be nice to get all family together at once if they really want to celebrate your engagement, give them a chance to get to know eachother better before your wedding.

    Post # 6
    Member
    5152 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2014

    View original reply
    TorontoBlondbee:  Personally… I think engagement parties are a bit silly. There will be PLENTY of events leading up to the wedding that will allow you to get plenty of attention! 

    If you do have one, I think they need to be thrown within 1-2 months of engagement – waiting until Spring/Summer will really be too far away – your engagement will be old news by then. Just my two cents! 

    Post # 7
    Member
    1111 posts
    Bumble bee

    View original reply
    TorontoBlondbee:  I don’t think having two is excessive in your case. The East Coast family wouldn’t be making it to the Toronto party and vice versa. So you won’t be inviting the same people twice.

    Your engagement party should happen shortly after the engagement itself. Typically within 3 months. However, Fiance and I were engaged the end of May and our Engagement Party was the first week of September. So just shortly outside of that 3 month window. 

    However – in your case – if you aren’t planning on going back to the East Coast until the Spring/Summer, there is no reason why your engagement party can’t be then. But I would hold the Toronto party within the next few months.

    Post # 8
    Member
    9575 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2015

    If your families want to throw you engagement parties in their respective hometowns let them! If it was you personally throwing two, no of course not. But everyone invited to both parties should be on your wedding list so keep that in mind. 

    My then-future in laws threw us a fabulous engagement party and it was a great time. I don’t know why people poopoo them. I love an open bar and a good time 🙂 if someone wants to throw you a party, you let them. It’s as much about your family as it is about the two of you. 

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