(Closed) When the job you accepted isn't the job you're doing- advice is appreciated :)

posted 4 years ago in Career
Post # 2
1581 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

View original reply
ladyofleisure :  I’m a young professional with only limited experience in management, however a different perspective always helps so I will give it a crack 🙂

  • Should I follow up with my employer to renegotiate my salary or other benefits due to the evolution of the role and responsibilities since I’ve started ( less than a month) Did you disuss pay reviews prior to accepting the job?  Does it say how often pay reviews are done in your company?  If so, and it’s something like 6 months, I would wait it out for the first review.  If it is 12 monthly or non-scheduled reviews, I wouldn’t renegotiate salary, but I would discuss a modest increase in benefits.  Where I live, travel to anywhere outside your regular office is tax deductable, you should ask your accountant if you’re not sure.
  • Should I cut my losses and find a new job? Recruiters and companies reach out to me weekly asking for interviews since i am in a very niche, sought after role.  Only you can answer this.  What is your 5 year plan?  If managing these projects is good experience for furthering your career and that is what you want, then I would stick it out, however if you are happy with the status quo of your previous job, then it might be best to look elsewhere. 
  • How do you guys deal with rude/aggressive colleagues or clients? Mind you, its a guy, and I’ve noticed he doesn’t talk to the men on the team this way at all.  I completely understand where you are coming from here as I work in a male dominated industry.  Depending on who it is/how bad and often the rudeness is, HR is a possibility, however I would typically shy away from that option as it does leave a mark against your name in a lot of cases.  What I do when I deal with guys like this, is make sure I know my stuff.  I present myself confidently and don’t shy away from their rudeness.  I find it goes one of two ways, you earn their respect and they treat you like one of the guys, or they like you even less.  Unfortunately if they don’t like this, there isn’t much you can do about it other than remain professional. Ultimately if it leads to bullying or anxiety about your job, you can either go to HR or find new employment, however its no point trying to cross that bridge until you get there.  Sorry you have to deal with that 🙁
  • Any tips/resources you guys reccomend for being a successful leader would be helpful as well! I want to be a strong leader, but as a woman- sometimes when I get even remotely direct people look at me as though I’m being a “bitch”. My last boss even said I was emotional when I pushed back on reconfiguring a technology a few days before it was supposed to go live. When a male colleague agreed that it wasn’t feasible, he wasn’t called emotional :(.   Again this is an example of women being treated differently in the workplace, see above.  As far as being a leader, I think there are a few important qualities.  Work towards gaining respect from your colleagues, don’t demand it.  Lead from the front and by example.  Don’t ask people to do something you wouldn’t do yourself.  Following up on everything is super important, whether it’s a member of your team who was off sick, or someone implementing something new.  Be organised, no one can trust you to run things if you can’t keep your desk clean.  Be accessible, don’t fob off clients or team members constantly.  Delegate everything you can get away with not doing yourself, if you are overrun it makes you look disorganised.  Use your manners with everyone.


Post # 3
3146 posts
Sugar bee

Cut your losses. This will get only marginally better, even with the most careful and logical discussions with your new employer.

Then after it gets a bit better, it will devolve again. Trust me. Getting something on your resume is not worth the stress, disrespect and overload you are describing. 

You sound smart, talented, competent, and in demand – don’t settle for this crap.

Post # 6
3146 posts
Sugar bee

Good for you!  Please update when you get your fabulous new position! 

Post # 7
1350 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

I would cut your loses. It seems like not only is the role not what you imagined but in general the company is a sh*t storm. 

As far as working on being a strong leader, I would get an executive coach they can be really helpful to working through your unknown bad habbits and making you stronger in leadership. 

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