Post # 1
I know there are a million “how to combine finances” threads. This is more of a when should we combine finances question.
Fiance and I are thinking about a fall 2012 wedding, however we’re starting the house buying process in January with a hope to move in the spring. Bees who have been in this position: when would you combine finances? Before buying a house? Before the wedding? After both?
I have talked to Fiance about it–I thought before the house made sense, but he pointed out that it might be easier to do after the wedding, and after I change my name.
Just looking to get the perspective of people who have been there before. 🙂
Post # 3
- Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast
Some married bees have never combined finances, nor do they plan to in the future. So there is no “right” answer.
That said, we combined finances when we moved in together (before the wedding). We have a “yours, mine, ours” system that allows us to pay for all shared expenses from the “ours” account and all individual whims from the “yours and mine” accounts. it works well for us.
Post # 4
We did it before we got married since we were buying a house together and were already engaged. Having to change your name later isn’t a big deal, you would have to do it if you had different accounts or the same account anyway. This way we were also able to cash all wedding checks before I changed my name.
Post # 5
We chose to combine after the wedding but we were not buying a house – in your situatuion i would go ahead and do it that way you guys can get used to the joint bank account and each others spending habits. your name shouldnt make a difference really – i actually got added to my husband bank account with my new name before i legally changed it. good luck!
Post # 6
We are going to combine our finances about a month before the wedding.
Post # 7
We’re combining after the wedding. He is the sole signer on the mortgage for our house, but I’ll probably get added after we’re married. We’ll do a combined checking acct where we’ll both contribute 70% of our income and keep the 30% for things like presents, treats for ourselves, etc. 🙂
Post # 8
We do the same. We opened a joint account and a savings account when we moved in together to pay all of our bills. We each have our own accounts to buy whatever we want with our money. Also, that allows me to still surprise him with gifts from time to time 🙂
My friend and her husband did not combine until after they got married, and they had been living together, and it seemed to work just as well.
Only thing I would say is make sure you are on the same page, because of course money can get sticky.
Post # 9
We are not combining. Im 29 and he’s 30 – we’ve already seen a few friends marriages end over money issues and while its not 100% avoidable, we’re doing our best to minimize the opportunities to bicker over money. We’ve also both been independent working adults long enough that it would be difficult getting used to someone else knowing what/when/why we’re spending our own money. We are opening a combined savings account, and agreeing on an amount we’ll both contribute on a weekly or monthly basis – to save up for a house down payment, etc. Other than that, we’re keeping our checking accounts and credit cards seperate.
but FYI, as I think a PP pointed out – changing of names has absolutely no effect on creating a joint account or adding a name to an existing account.
Post # 10
- Wedding: November 2011 - Florida Aquarium
We combined everything 6 months before we got engaged. I had a higher paying job, and he had moved to a freakishly expensive city for me, so it made sense for us. We had thought of it as our money for a long time– we’ve lived together for three years. It’s so much easier just having “our money” than dividing everything.
Post # 11
Whoops–I screwed up the poll. Fixed now!
Thanks for the input guys! Just as an FYI we probably aren’t going to combine everything. We will maintain individual accounts as well as create a joint checking and savings. 🙂
Post # 12
You forgot a choice- never. My fiance and I agreed not to mix accounts. I will have access to his account and vice versa but we will not do them joint. We are an “older” couple so we are used to having lived our life separately and that makes us comfortable.
Post # 13
We were initially planning on combining finances after the wedding but since we received engagement gifts, we decided to open a joint account. So as of now, it will be used for wedding stuff and it will be our household account after we get married.
Post # 14
I agree that there is no right answer. We combined ours before we even moved in together, and it has worked flawlessly for us.
Post # 15
@Taylor4: It sounds like buying the house is really the big question. Have you talked to lenders about your mortgage? Since you will both be single when you buy the house, the deed will likely be in both your names as single people (ie: John Smith, a single male, Jane Doe, a single female). When you marry, you’ll change the title accordingly.
If I were in your shoes, I’d talk to a lender or finance person to find out what’s most advantageous for gettting a loan. The question aslo becomes whose name does the loan go in, or does it go under both your names, etc.
If you end up buying a house jointly prior to the wedding, there will be name changes involved regardless… so I don’t really see the point that your Fiance is trying to make (unless he plans to put the house in his name solely).
Post # 16
we added each others names to our accounts after we got married, 11 months after buying our house.