- 5 years ago
- Wedding: January 2015
I am at an interesting and difficult point in my relationship. Through some ups and downs my fiance and I are trying to stick it out and stay together because we really do love each other. We have postponed our wedding and been engaged for almost 2 years already. The sad thing is I am not sure if I ever will fee that “Yes…100% This is the Guy!!” feeling. More like a “He’s Great, I Love Him, but Why do I Want More?” type thing. I realize that much of my reluctance comes from the fact that I am only mildy sexually attracted to him. We have good sex but I don’t CRAVE him physically like I have other partners. Still, hes an amazing guy.
Well, I was watching a The View the other day and some of the ladies said something like “when you marry someone you have to desire them. You can’t spend your whole marriage not wanting to go to bed with your husband.” I then came across this entry (pasted below) in an advice column. Do you agree. Can you marry someone you are not sexually attracted to. Even if so much more is there, should you leave just to ease your doubts?
Go, even though you love him.
Go, even though he’s kind and faithful and dear to you.
Go, even though he’s your best friend and you’re his.
Go, even though you can’t imagine your life without him.
Go, even though he adores you and your leaving will devastate him.
Go, even though your friends will be disappointed or surprised or pissed off or all three.
Go, even though you once said you would stay.
Go, even though you’re afraid of being alone.
Go, even though you’re sure no one will ever love you as well as he does.
Go, even though there is nowhere to go.
Go, even though you don’t know exactly why you can’t stay.
Go, because you want to.
Because wanting to leave is enough.