(Closed) When to get married after law school

posted 5 years ago in College
  • poll: Which is the best time for a law student to get married?
    Spring break 3L : (8 votes)
    18 %
    After graduation in May : (2 votes)
    4 %
    After bar in Aug/Sept : (19 votes)
    42 %
    A year after graduation : (16 votes)
    36 %
  • Post # 29
    Member
    712 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    Darling Husband and I got married after he took the bar. He wanted to be completely finished with studying for the exam, as well as all his friends. The good thing was that everyone came to the wedding because most had not started their jobs yet and all finished the bar so they were happy to celebrate. The bad thing was that Darling Husband had to start his big law job 2 days after our wedding– so honeymoon was delayed!

    Post # 33
    Member
    1310 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    marbelles:  My friends who clerked didn’t take the bar until after their clerkships, so they were able to get married after graduation since they weren’t going straight into bar study mode.

    Post # 35
    Member
    165 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: August 2016

    Changing your name after you start practicing can be a pain, just a thought! We got engaged my 2L, his 3L year and planned on doing a quick courthouse wedding so my name would be changed– well three years later, we’re still not married and I’m not changing my name so do what’s best for you! I can tell you, the bar sucks so I wouldnt “interfere” with studying by planning a wedding unless you do it before bar prep starts!

    Post # 37
    Member
    444 posts
    Helper bee

    mdorsogna:  Most of my hardcore bar studying began mid June. I knew people who had to work at their firms through June and only got off at the beginning of July to study. And we all passed on the first try!  May was sort of…half-assed, and the first week of barbri was not crucial (plus you have all the materials and videos to review on your own time too). To be honest, if you have the grades to score a big law job, studying and taking the bar really won’t be *that* hard. I mean yes it sucks and I wouldn’t want to take it again, but you’re better off than most if you’ve been rocking law school.

    Just throwing that out there, take a look at your barbri schedule and see exactly what they have scheduled that first week…it might totally be possible to get married the weekend after graduation.

    Oh and I did judicial clerkships after graduating-I took the bar with my classmates and started my job the day after I found out I passed. I’m not sure what post-grad clerkship doesn’t require you to have sat for the bar, but my experience has been bar passage required.

    Post # 38
    Member
    9364 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper

    pumilionis:  Wow, my experience has been pretty much the exact opposite of yours.

    I went to a top 5 law school and had a few classmates who were excellent students fail the CA bar (and a couple failed more than once). I was convinced I myself had failed too up until the day results came out. I know the CA bar is a different animal from most other states, so maybe that’s why we were so traumatized.

    As for clerking, my classmates have clerked at the Federal District Court/COA levels and some are doing SCOTUS clerkships right now and none have taken the bar yet. So I would say that it’s not always a requirement.

    Post # 39
    Member
    444 posts
    Helper bee

    TheGridMonster:  Funny how things can vary so greatly place to place! Honestly, I don’t know why you would want to wait much past graduation to take the bar…I feel like the farther I get from law school, the worse I would do on it. Now that I’m not in school/testing mode anymore (and also pushed 80% of bar law out of my brain), I’m fairly certain I’d fail, haha.

    Post # 40
    Member
    9364 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper

    pumilionis:  Yeah, I agree, if I were them I definitely would have taken it the summer after 3L, but I think some judges wanted them to start right away and what judges want, judges get!

    Post # 41
    Member
    1310 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    TheGridMonster:  Agree with you.  My friends did federal clerkships and were not required to take the bar before starting.  Like your friends, their judges wanted them to start right away.  Also the bar had little to do with what I studied in law school (also top 5 school), so whenever I took BarBri would have been the best time to take the bar 🙂  I didn’t clerk so I did take the bar right away, but I understood why some chose not to.

    Post # 42
    Member
    800 posts
    Busy bee

    mdorsogna:  Congratulations!  Girl, I feel you– this issue hits too close to home!  Instead of working on a final paper, I’m e-mailing my friends about bridesmaids dresses!  We decided to have the wedding after the bar although there may be some overlap between wedding planning and bar prep.  Having said that, we don’t have a date yet so the wedding could be late 2015 if we plan now or next year.  I would definitely feel more pressure to plan now if we locked down a venue for 2015.  I wouldn’t want to study for the bar and feel the need to plan the wedding.  My mother insists on tackling one thing at a time because the last thing you want is to fail the bar because you were too distracted with wedding planning. 

    Post # 44
    Member
    1070 posts
    Bumble bee

     

    TheGridMonster:  I totally agree!  I was an absolute certifiable crazy person studying for the bar exam.  I can’t imagine planning a wedding and having bride brain at the same time.  I actually told my study partners the week before the bar exam that I was going to quit!  LOL.  And I was #2 in my class.  And at the time, my state only gave the bar exam once a year.  So if you didn’t pass, you had to wait an entire whole year to try again.  So the pressure was crazy.  I know many extremely intelligent grads that were at the tops of their classes who did not pass on the first try.  And that wasn’t state specific.    

    • This reply was modified 4 years, 9 months ago by  mkendrick.
    Post # 45
    Member
    486 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    mdorsogna:  My brother and sister in law got maried 1 week after they both took the bar exam.  We all told them they were crazy.  The key for them was that they didn’t care much about the wedding details.  They picked an all inclusive place and everything else was just sort of whatever to them.  I’m sure she spent time planning and thinking about what she wanted, but it didn’t seem to add too much stress because they weren’t DIYing anything, they really both just had to show up.  If you can have that laid back relaxed attitude about everything it probably doesn’t matter much when you get married.  If you’re anything like me, super type A and want to DIY everythingggggg, then I would wait until well after the bar is over.  As a side note, they both passed the bar.

    The topic ‘When to get married after law school’ is closed to new replies.

    Find Amazing Vendors