Post # 1
Another poster made me think about this. Is there a hard and fast rule about when to give +1s?
Our rule of thumb has been:
- In a steady relationship for more than 6 months? -Yes
- Family/friend who won’t know anyone else attending. – Yes
So now I’m wondering.. what about these scenarios:
- Cousin (21) who doesn’t date traditionally, but is in an open relationship with two men.
- Two male bosses (brothers, 29 and 34) who are attending with their parents and sister.
- Eight non-immediete relatives (18-32) but aren’t in relationships and are attending with family.
- High school year, not in a relationship. Attending with family.
ETA: I don’t see all of them at church on Sunday’s so I took that out. A handful I’ve never even met.
Also, cost IS a major issue! It’s $80+/head.
Post # 3
If the guest is over 16 and you don’t 100% know the name of the person they would like to accompany them. (Name names where possible and invite under-16s together with their parents).
Post # 4
We gave +1s to everyone. It depends on capacity/budget. If you have room give them all +1s, if not then don’t. And I’d give the cousin one +1.
Post # 5
@MrsN14: I would LOVE to give +1s to everyone, but our budget won’t allow it. My parents are graciously hosting, but it’s more than $80 per head for dinner and drinks. :/
@joya_aspera: So you say everyone over 16?
Post # 6
@OnceUponATime: Yes, when names are not known (e.g., I wouldn’t invite Mrs. X “+1” if I had good reason to believe she was bringing Mr. X, I would name them both). I would reduce the named guestlist if I thought cost would be an issue.
Post # 7
I had this problem too and I wouldve loved to give everyone who was in a relationship a plus one but my are hosting so they made the rules and we ended up with anyone living together/engaged/married/dating for longer than a year or two.
Post # 8
@joya_aspera: I definitely go out of my way to find out names too! I’m really interested in your strategy. Is that formal etiquette? (I feel so out of the loop!) I would have a really hard time eliminating my family members so other family members could bring dates I don’t know :/