(Closed) When to have a baby??

posted 4 years ago in Babies
Post # 2
Member
2571 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

I’ve thought “three more years” since I was 26, now that I’m 30, I still think 3 more years. My Fiance keeps casually mentioning maybe sooner than that, but since it’s my body I keep brushing it off. Plus we still have 7 more months until the wedding! 

Post # 4
Member
1939 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

I don’t have a feeling of biological clock ticking or noticeable maternal urge, no cooing over babies or jealousy of mothers with children I see around us. 

However I have a feeling that “probably” I’ll want kids in the “future” and that we should get on to it to avoid regret that we didn’t. 

But then I don’t see myself wanting to be pregnant anytime soon and I just have other things I would prefer to do 🤔 So my brain has the idea but my heart and body is not in it at all.

 

Post # 6
Member
9575 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

Prob start around 32 (2 years). Want my husband to finish his masters and move out of state first. Want to just keep working and saving money in the meantime. I don’t have baby fever enough to override waiting for a practical time. 

Post # 7
Member
2167 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

View original reply
Mrstobe26 :  I just had my first baby at 25, and my 26th birthday was Nov 3rd 😬. My daughter is 3 months old and I freakin’ love being a mom. I thought for a long time I’d be closer to 30 and want to be a working mom so when we decided to try last year and since going back to work I want to eventually be a Stay-At-Home Mom and have at least 1 more if not 2. 

Everything with our baby feels a million times greater. With that being said we bought our first home before TTC and had lived together for 3+ years. I’m glad we waited a bit (originally we were going to TTC right after our wedding, soooo glad we didn’t do that). It’s honestly scary to think about because until you’re actually pregnant it’s like am I really ready? It sounds like you have some goals you want to hit before baby so I suggest keeping up with those and baby after that! 

Post # 8
Member
508 posts
Busy bee

View original reply
Mrstobe26 :  I am currently 29 and we just started TTC. When I was 26, babies were not really on my mind. In fact, when I got married at 25, I told DH, “Let’s wait 5-7 years to have children.”

It wasn’t until about 3 months ago that I actually wanted to start having children. Then, I woke up one day and said, “I am going to get my IUD out in October”…so I did. Now, we are in the TWW of our first offically cycle of TTC. I wil test on Thursday. 

Our progression was more of “bucket list” method to be prepared. We wanted to build a home, so we did that 3 years ago. We wanted to pay off all non-mortgage debt (i.e., student loans, cars, etc) and we finished that in August. We wanted to have 6 months of emergency funds saved up, accomplished that in July. We wanted to have $5,000 as a baby start up fund, got that in September. 

We also wanted to travel to Europe (check), the East Coast (check) and go back to Europe one more time (check-going in February). We both finished our master’s degrees and got the promotions we wanted.

So our plans did not center around an age so much as what we wanted out of life. Not sure if this helps, but that was our approach.

Post # 9
Member
1189 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

I kept saying “a couple more years” and would maybe have kept saying that forever, until I was infertile. I’m 31 and just gave birth to my firstborn 2.5 weeks ago. I still feel like a teenager, but I know I’ll do my very best to be a good mom to my boy! 

I don’t think you ever feel ready. At least I didn’t!

Post # 13
Member
1660 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

We’re both 26 and are keeeeeeeeeeeen to head to baby city.

We get married in 4 months and plan to start TTC at the end of next year. 

We’re old souls and introverts who don’t have any habits that aren’t child friendly. We have sober habits and are homebodies for the most part. We live a really quiet life TBH and I think we’d have no trouble adjusting to children and parenting 🙂 

But we’ve also been together for almost 9 years and have our own home and things are just right for us I guess – both sets of parents also live closeby so we have a lot of support.

Hard to say when the right time for someone is. Everyone is just so different and some people at 25 are more mature than others at 35. 

Post # 14
Member
185 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

I had my baby at 26, I’m 27 now and think it’s amazing. I had horrible baby fever for the year before though, and we stuggled with infertility. I didn’t know you could love so strongly. I love my SO and my friends and family of course, but the love I have for my child is just crazy. Also, everything seems better with her, like this is her first christmas and it hadn’t felt so magical since I was a kid. Going to the zoo and seeing her cute face light up the first time she sees a lion? Going swimming, watching my favorite disney movies with her, having her taste new food, watching snow fall… it makes everyday moments magical!

That’s my experience, I hope when the time comes you’ll feel the same 🙂

Post # 15
Member
1169 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

Ya I understand how you feel. The closest I’ve ever came to maternal was after the latest disaster in Haiti, I thought, wow that country is constantly getting shit on, I wonder how many babies and children need homes there. I’d like to do something like that someday. As far as my own, I keep saying at least five years (I’m 25). Maybe it will be three or maybe it will be seven. Or maybe never. I get grossed out thinking of being pregnant too so that quashes most baby making thoughts. Also I hate needles and spines (yes weird things I know), so epidurals are a major no for me. We shall see, but I think it’s hard to have concrete plans.

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