(Closed) When to have bridal shower and who to invite?

posted 8 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
Member
4001 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Before I got engaged I would of told you you should definitely have a shower.  Now, with mine fast approaching and with the drama I’ve been dealing with, I say, if you don’t want one, that’s fine!  Your Maid/Matron of Honor should understand.  The shower tends to be important to your closest family like your Mother, Aunts, Grandmother, whoever.  So you may not want to deprieve them of that.  That being said, I’m pretty sure its customary to invite the women who are invited to the wedding.  Not the random plus ones or your FI’s friends girlfriend you met a couple times.  But I think your FI’s cousins/Aunts are probably going to feel slighted if they don’t get an invite.  And, I’d say she should throw something together soon, a shower is usually a couple months before the wedding, a month should work just fine too.

Post # 4
Member
2083 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Trust me, you will love a bridal shower!! I had mine just this past weekend, two months before the big day!

It includes all the women that are close to you (aunts, cousins, grandmas, moms, siblings, close friends)… My mom also invited some of her close friends. FI’s side should also be included – it can be a good time for the women of both sides to acquaint themselves with one another! FI’s side had his mom, aunt & close cousins, along with some of his mother’s closest friends.

You can always keep it as intimate as you’d like. Mine ended up being about 50 people total. It was so much fun though, plus you get to do the registeries and receive gifts that will be incredibly helpful post-wedding.

Besides, sometimes MOHs and BMs may not be into throwing a party for you – so if your Maid/Matron of Honor is insisting I say go with it! All you need to do is show up, greet people and mingle, and of course receive beautiful gifts!

Post # 5
Member
1001 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Yes, you should definitely have one!  I am having two.  One is here in my hometown and being thrown by my bridesmaids.  It’s at my aunt’s house and 6 weeks before the wedding.  My BMs invited all my close female relatives and friends, and wives/girlfriends of our groomsmen.

The second is being thrown by Future Mother-In-Law and being held in FI’s hometown.  It’s a month before the wedding.  I am not sure who is coming!  I assume FMIL’s friends and relatives?

Post # 7
Member
200 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

well, you invite other people besides your family to the shower – bridesmaids and other close female friends.

i just had my shower this weekend and it was just my family, my mom’s close friends and a handful of my close friends and we had a blast.

i invited my fiance’s mother, female cousins and aunt but they all live out of the country so i knew that they wouldn’t be able to make it.

i think that you should have the shower a few weeks before the wedding and dont worry about them not being able to attend – just make sure that they receive an invitation to the shower.

i think it would be too much to have the shower during the week of the wedding.

Post # 9
Member
10 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2010

The last bridal shower I attended was the night before the wedding. It was a destination wedding and it was the only time everyone was together – it was very simple and held at the same venue as the rehersal dinner – though the men were told to scram (politely). The bride had a lot of fun and it made the wedding go a lot more smoothly because all of the out-of-towners had stories to share from the night before with each other. I made some great friends there too.

I’m having four bridal showers to encompass all sections of my guest list and they are all within a two week period! One is going to be co-ed and my Fiance is coming. We probably won’t play any games at that one, just eat and open gifts. I think the men will be more comfortable without the games. It will be just like a typical family party. I am just as excited for that one as the other four. It will be a relief to know I won’t be embarrassed in front of my family/friends and future in-laws (haha)

Good luck with your decision!

Post # 10
Member
1001 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I’ve been two two showers where men were invited, but the emphasis was much more on brunch/drinking than shower games and gifts.  It depends what sort of day you would like to have!  I wanted to keep mine strictly ladies.  The men are all coming afterwards to eat, but they’re not coming to the actual shower.

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