(Closed) When to not be sensible…need advice.

posted 8 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
1315 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Can you use the time between here and there to make yourselves even more employable?  Extra courses etc…

It’s not worth being miserable, but it’s a bit scary making the jump too…

Post # 4
Member
523 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I would definitely not be comfortable moving without a job lined up, especially if you don’t have a lot saved. I would definitely start looking for jobs in Washington as you get closer to the end of his contract. Good luck!

Post # 5
Member
8353 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2011

I really suggest that you stay where you are for now, unless he can transfer to the same position with the same benefits. I live in Washington and jobs are scarce. I think being responsible is what should come first. You don’t want to end up on the street when you get to some place that you think you might like better.

Post # 6
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

Use the time you have before his contract is up to find employment, housing and that type of thing. i would not make the move unless you both had secure employment lined up cuz then you might end up screwing yourself

Post # 8
Member
1079 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Maybe you can line up a job in WA. I’d be really uncomfortable moving without a job lined up.

Post # 9
Member
1315 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I’d be like him. Any of us could walk out under a bus tomorrow. You have to be able to at least tolerate whatever it is you do to get by.

Post # 10
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Ok I’ll be the mean voice of reason. Moving to a new place with no job, no health benefits, no benefits at all, and no money is completely irresponsible. Just b/c you WANT to live there doesn’t mean you guys are even capable of it! Where will you live?! I mean, seriously. You need health insurance. You can start looking for jobs now so you have one lined up–that’d be what I’d do.

Living in a city you hate is better than living in a city when you have no job and you can’t even enjoy the city =]. It’d totally ruin the beauty of living in washington. Plus, what is it about washington? You want to live in seattle? or near the mountains? Portland is a nice area, too. If you can broaden your search a little, you can get the “feel” you want, but have more chances for jobs.

I’m not a chance-taker, though. It seems foolish because it only really works out a small percentage of the time and the risks are really, really big. If you could find a job where you are now, it’d help you get some money saved up. Even if the job is poopy.

PS he can look for a job and just not list his work phone number or other stuff on it. and under the boxes that say “is it ok if we contact your employer?” just click no! It’s completely 100% doable

Post # 11
Member
458 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Why don’t you apply for jobs in Washington while living in Arizona? Or atleast scout out some companies you’d like to work for and make contact?

Post # 12
Member
806 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

In my opinion, it sounds like a bad idea the way you explained it.  If you had family you could live with there, until you got on your feet, that would be one thing.  But it doesn’t sound like you guys have the money to live and eat if it takes more than a few weeks/months for one or both of you to find good work.

I think it would be a lot smarter to have a real idea how the two of you are going to make it once you get there.  One of you should have a job lined up w/ benefits before you make the move.  You may have a hard time even getting an apt lease out there if you don’t have a current source of income to list on the application.

Your FI’s concern about getting fired because he was looking for other work shouldn’t be much of an issue unless he works in a really tiny and gossipy industry.  Especially with the new jobs being halfway across the country.  And if he’s considering upping and quitting w/ no backup job to move to WA, would it really be that bad if they were to let him go?  I think it’s worth the small risk to know where your food and rent are coming from once you get to WA.

In my eyes, there’s not being sensible (i.e. for me this would be buying some really expensive shoes or splurging on wedding flowers or something equally useless and expensive but it makes me happy – the key thing being that I can cover the expenses with savings) vs. chucking a good job when you really don’t have the kind of financial security established to back that up.  I would call that a really big risk.  What would happen if you moved and it didn’t work out and you ran out of savings?  Would your families be that sympathetic in terms of bailing you out, given the big gamble you took?

Post # 13
Hostess
18643 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I really would not jump ship and move there until one or both of you has a job offer in hand.  It is far too risky in this economy to toss a job aside with nothing that is definite for how you will pay the bills.

Post # 14
Member
2214 posts
Buzzing bee

I agree with PPs that at least one of you should have a job (with benefits) lined up before you go. And since you say that it can’t be him, then maybe you should start looking. If you can land a job, then you’ll have some security when you move there and when he’s looking for a job. I think the carefree, “everything will be alright” attitude is pretty irresponsible when you’re talking about whether you’ll be able to afford living expenses and medical care.

Post # 15
Member
218 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2006

It is possible to look for jobs while still being employed.  My Darling Husband has been doing it for the 2 years — that’s right, he has a job (with a Masters and 10+ years experience in the field) but has been looking for 2 years! He just tells them not to contact his current employer and gives his cell number.  Then he keeps his cell ringer off @ work and just checks it frequently.  That way people don’t notice his cell is ringing more than usual!

I hate where we live too, but the reality is that we have a house, health ins and other stuff that I don’t want to give up!

Post # 16
Member
2309 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

I agree make sure everything is lined up properly before you take that leap of faith. Maybe you can have a 2 year plan for moving. Where you can get a steady saving going and he can be more comfortable actively looking for a job in Washington.

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