(Closed) when to send a thank you card?

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
8446 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

I send mine ASAP so that I don’t have to worry about it after the wedding.  I think it’s customary to wait until after the wedding though because I think you’re supposed to wait to open the gifts.

Post # 4
5189 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2013

send one now or they may think you aren’t acknowledging it.

Post # 5
1513 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

i was actually signing on to ask the same thing. i just got my first gift, but my shower isnt for 2 more weeks. do i send now or wait until after the shower and do them all at once?

Post # 7
7211 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2015

@annabelle_lee:  Send it now so they don’t think it got lost!

Post # 8
3267 posts
Sugar bee

@annabelle_lee:  Thank you notes should be sent as soon as a gift is received.

The gold standard being sent before you go to bed, the night the gift is received.

Post # 9
5885 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

You should send it ASAP, but I didn’t send mine until 2-3 months after the wedding. We had the Thank You cards printed with our wedding pictures.

Post # 10
3230 posts
Sugar bee

Send ASAP so you won’t get overwhelmed later. We are planning on sending a thank you for attending our wedding card too with our picture on it later too.

Post # 11
1724 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 1998

Send ’em ASAP – but I don’t think people would bat much of a lash if you got the thank-you for this particular gift out within a month of the wedding.

My husband’s uncle actually used his timeshare to put us up in a resort for a week for our Honeymoon – and I think the reservations were made back in November or December. I now regret that I didn’t send out the thank-you until the day after we got married (this March). Part of it was because I was distracted, and part of it was because – like other members of his family – I didn’t know if he was also going to give us a gift for the wedding or what, and I didn’t want to end up sending him 7 thank you cards.

My mother-in-law gave us wedding gifts on about 6 different occasions over the last 9 months, which could explain some of my confusion. But generally – the sooner, the better. And writing thank you notes is pretty awesome.


I got a leg-up on mine before the wedding by including stock phrases at the beginning. “It was so good to see you at the wedding, hope you had a good time, wanted to thank you for…” The cards were all half-complete before the wedding because of that, along with envelopes. The day after my wedding, I finished it off with a quick note about the gift. All of my cards were sent out the day after my wedding because of that.

It was a good decision. I can’t imagine how annoying it would be having that hang over your head for so long.

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