(Closed) When to Start Ceremony after "Start Time" HELP Reallly stressed out!

posted 6 years ago in Ceremony
  • poll: Is 30min of music normal before starting the wedding?
    Yes, totally normal. People will actually expect it. : (6 votes)
    21 %
    No, max late start is normally 15min : (23 votes)
    79 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    7904 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

    Please start on time. It is really rude to assume that your guests cannot follow directions and then to make your guests who show up on time sit and wait for you. The music should start 30 minutes prior to the ceremony time printed on your invitation and you should start the processional of the family at that start time.

    The groom is usally escorted in with the officiant and often the groomsmen after the family is sat. They either enter from the side of down the aisle, depending on venue. Your officiant will help you organize this at the rehearsal.

    Post # 4
    Member
    2295 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    I will probably start about 5 – 10 minutes after the stated time. I’ll have our DOC keep an eye out and let us know if everyone is seated. We will have music playing as people are arriving just for mood.

    I will probably have the officiant just hanging out near the front side, no processional.

    Fiance will seat his mother during the processional than stay up front.

    Post # 5
    Member
    134 posts
    Blushing bee

    That’s what my harp lady told me too. I guess you play 30 min before. It’s music for the seating. But I put 5:00pm on my invite, and the sun sets at 5:33 on our big day! SOO I’m a little worried about how everything will pan out.

    I think I’m going to have her play from 4:45 (for those who get there before 5), until 5:15 (for anybody runnning a little behind), then cut the ceremony a little shorter than expected so we aren’t doing everything in the dark!

    I’m wondering though, if my invite says 5:00pm, what time will most people consider for arrival?

    I think the 30 min time is normal, but you might want to put your parties walk time back a little maybe? Maybe like 20 min of music? And I’m still unsure about how the groom goes down the aisle. I’ll be watching this board to see if somebody tells us!

     

     

    Post # 6
    Member
    7904 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

    @jeza_s:  If an invitation says 5, I’d show up between 4:30 and 4:40.

    Post # 7
    Member
    11272 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2012

    @mrsSonthebeach:  i agree.

    don’t leave your guests waiting.  it’s rude.  this will set the tone for the rest of the evening.  if the invite says 5, start at 5. 

    Post # 8
    Member
    2295 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    I tend to think start on time as well, as I am always earlier than the printed time on the invitation, but at all the weddings I have been to, a fair number of people are still getting seated at that time. Not to insult guests, I think we just assume everyone knows some things when my experience shows thu don’t.

    i think venue also plays in. If parking is difficilt, there’s a walk to the ceremony area, or it is an area they are not familiar with, people don’t always build time in for that. Drives me bonkers as an early bird, but it is true.

    That’s why I think having a watch out is the best of both worlds. If guests really did arrive RJ time, then you can get started. If 40% of people are still straggling in, give it a couple minutes. I wouldn’t wait more than 10 though, I think over that and people start to wonder.

    Post # 9
    Member
    1252 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    @JaneDomani:  I think you are getting confused here, you should both play music before the ceremony AND start the ceremony on time.  Playing music before the ceremony while guests are being seated is normal, yes, but starting your ceremony 30 minutes late is rude.  So if your invitation says 5:00 you should start the music at 4:30 because that is when guests will start arriving, but the actual ceremony should begin as close to 5:00 as possible.  Please DO NOT delay your ceremony start time by 30 minutes and make your guests wait, those who arrived early could end up waiting over an hour and that is not cool.

    Post # 10
    Member
    2295 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    Also, weddingbee on my phone is horrible. Autocorrect does crazy things. Sorry for all the typos.

    Post # 11
    Member
    11272 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2012

    look at it this way…if you are going to the movies and the movie starts at 7:00pm, you will show up 15-20 minutes earlier to get your seat.  if the show doesn’t start until 7:30, and all you saw was a black screen for 30 minutes, you’d be pretty upset.

    Post # 12
    Member
    6823 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    Please start on time, as PP said it is rude to start late. And every wedding I have been to there has been music prior the wedding usually 30 min before the start time. 

    Post # 14
    Member
    7904 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

    I would still plan to start on time and be willing to wait up to an extra 10 minutes absolute maximum if a steady stream, legit steady, of guests are still coming in. Any guests later than that can be sat from the sides while the ceremony is in progress. Do you really want your guests sitting around for 30 minutes checking their watches wondering when the heck this thing is going to get started?

    Post # 15
    Member
    4194 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

    ***PLEASE*** start your wedding at the time you list on your invites. No better way to tick off your guests.

    We were invited to a wedding this past Friday at 5:30pm. Darling Husband left work early, we rush across town to avoid Friday night rush hour, and arrive at 5:10, 20 minutes before the ceremony was supposed to start.

    Well, the wedding didn’t start until 6pm-they put 5:30 on the invites so everyone would be there on time. Which was great for any guest who might have shown up “late”, but for us- leaving work early/doing everything we could to be there on time, we were pissed, waiting 50 minutes for this wedding to start. 

    Music normally starts half an hour before hand, while your guests are arriving/finding their seats. If you need extra time setting up, I’d hire extra people to help/ask your caterer, etc. for help, as opposed to inconveniencing your guests by making them wait.

    Post # 16
    Member
    341 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I think what most people do is play music BEFORE the ceremony begins, while guests are taking their seats.  Our ceremony is at 4:00pm, our harpist will start playing music at 3:30pm since some guests will get there earlier, it gives them something to listen to while they wait. We are planning on starting our ceremony at 4:05pm as long as everyone is seated.

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