Post # 1
So we aren’t married yet but in April we will be 🙂 Anyways… I have one daughter, she’s 4 and a wonderful little girl. And after childbirth and the newborn stage I decided I didn’t want any more kids, maybe one but that’s it. I love kids but it was a long 12 hour labor and she had reflux so it was a long 6 months after birth. It was worth it but it made my desire of children go from 4 to maybe 2.
So Fiance agrees that he just wants one more and we both agreed to a few years after marriage. Of course when finances are better and everything is going smoothly. I still have two years left of school and he was just offered a great job and his school is done in a few weeks, so he’s got the job lined up as soon as he finishes school.
We don’t plan to have kids right away at all. Buy a home, be done with school of course and I was recommending wait until we’re 30 (He’s 26, I’m 25). I think 30 is a good age to try. I think he’s thinking more along the lines of 28.
So I like the idea of waiting, and when I see those cute bundles of joy I want another, but I quickly remember the experience with the first and am quick to say “let’s wait” which is responsible anyways, but is 30 going to be to big of a difference in child number one and two age wise? I’m just wondering when ya’ll plan to have a baby after marriage?
Post # 3
I am a bit confused. Your poll is about us, the readers, but you present your situation which are verrrry different. If someone REALLY wanted kids and was 40, I might say before marriage or right away, but you are in no danger of getting too old upon marriage.
So are you asking advice on what you should do in your circumstance?
Post # 4
No, just wanting to get the general idea. I am concerned about the age difference but more concerned about having a child before I’m ready and I know it wont be for a while. So I’m just curious about others ideas of when the right time will be
Post # 5
my daughter had colic and id do it again. there are hard moments to every story but u always make it through. sometimes our head convinces us from what our hearts want. when your established career wise and settled i say go for it sometimes people set an age and are die hard for that limitation. take it more as a guideline not a minimum age standard (hope my rant made sense)
Post # 6
me and my SO have a 26 year difference but we are still waiting for our second child because our lifestyle isnt set for another child yet so i DO understand ur situation and concerns remember guys can always have children for the most part. my SO has 12 brothers and sisters EEK!
Post # 7
I’m in the 1 year range, Fiance is in the yesterday range. We talked seriously about it over the weekend and have decided to start TTC 3-6 months after the wedding, as long as we have the money saved up that we decided we would save before TTC.
I honestly don’t think I’ll ever feel 100% “ready” for a child. I’d be waiting many many many years if I waited until I was ready!
Post # 8
We waited two years, just over two years, and that was perfect for us!