When you're Green with Envy…

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
Post # 31
Member
2394 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

I understand. Sometimes I get a little competitive. Especially with my Husband’s Ex. Primarily because she’s a horrible mom & did terrible things to my husband while they were married. It irks me that she posts these pics of her & their daughters with lovey dovey captions…. knowing that she barely sees them & that she totally dumps her kids for her boyfriend. The kids live with us but lately she’s playing mom & seeing the kids more often (probably to induce her boyfriend to marry her, as he’s got kids, and she needs to prove she’s good step-mom material). Anyhow, or I’ll see her new hair extensions & latest “pampering” session posted on social media & know that she just texted my husband about how she can’t possibly have the kids this weekend because she doesn’t have any food at her house. Stuff like that. It’s not real. It also irks because I see how the kids idolize her (craving her attention)  while my husband does all the actual parenting & barely gets acknowledged. 

The thing is, though, that I know she’s deeply jealous of our life. She’s jealous of me. Her presence on social media is there to paint a pic of affluence so that she can seem to be what she’s not. 

Post # 32
Member
1254 posts
Bumble bee

Halo094 :  

To be honest with you sometimes social media is the super worst.

I’ll give you an example of that….my life is nothing like Darling Husband & I show on social media.

Everyone only sees what we WANT them to. And they make assumptions and comparisons about their lives to ours not knowing what’s behind the scenes.

Don’t get me wrong I’m happy and I love my life…but it’s not as “relationship goals” as everyone thinks..

Post # 33
Member
340 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: Hans Fahden Vineyards

Halo094 :  Social media is a great way to be jealous if you get sucked into it — I went to high school with some very famous people and am from a competitive area (silicon valley), so people post some things that may very well be impossible for me to get/do/etc. I know that social media can also paint what can be an opposite picture of a relationship. 

Gratitude kills jealousy. Start somewhere basic about something you’re grateful for without comparing it to anything. When you see the good in each thing and person, and you can isolate that person/thing/experience mentally just for the good it is. The easiest way for me to not be jealous is to put down my phone, and look around.  

Post # 34
Member
1220 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I didn’t read all the replies to this, but it made me think about a post I read earlier on Facebook. The guy said a thing about how people post only what they want you to see on social media etc, then continued by saying that he got married this weekend and people will look at his photos and think how amazing it was, but the truth is he suffers from depression and wakes up every day to unbearable sadness.  It broke my heart to read that. Everyone gets jealous at times, but social media is a filter for real life. 

Post # 35
Member
522 posts
Busy bee

It is like you took the words right out of my mouth. I have the same feelings. Me and my best friend graduated from college at the same time and her life fast forwarded after that, within 6 years they got engaged and had a huge engagement trip and the ring is 2ct diamond ring (which she has told me multiple times), had an extravagant wedding, bought a house which is really a mension, and had kids and now all I see is their family vacation pictures and their professional pics from every event and all the vacation pictures. All while me and the hubby have had one hardship after another. Everytime I think we might be ok and might start planning our future something else major happens. My ring is a cheap sterling silver ring, we had to elope because we could not afford the wedding, we are so far from house or kids that there is no use even thinking about it, and worst of all he just lost his job so there is that.

Post # 36
Member
129 posts
Blushing bee

Some of the unhappiest, least satisfied people I know show off the most on social media.

I hope this is not the case with your friend. Like the others have said, it would be best to take a little break laughing

Post # 37
Member
28 posts
Newbee

This is something a psychologist told me once – “there will always be someone better off than you, and there will always be someone worse off than you”.

I keep reminding myself that when I’m not feeling great about my life. Sometimes all we can do is dream and work towards those dreams 🙂 

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