Post # 1
I wanted to pick your guys’ brains a little bit here as I am having SUCH a hard time figuring out where to have our wedding.
My fiance is from Brazil. I am originally from the east coast (NY and CT) and went to graduate school in NC where my brother and his family currently live, where my parents are soon moving to and most of my friends are scattered on the east coast.
We met in CA where we currently live. Anywho… I have searched high and low for an affordable venue that has the style I envision- literally all over the US and even considered Mexico (as a “halfway” point). Needless to say CA is way too expensive. our next option was NC which seems to be more affordable. I found a beautiful outdoor venue in a natural setting with lots of trees (pretty much what I’ve wanted) an hour outside Raleigh (where my family is). I really love this place, but I’m having second thoughts because I keep thinking how difficult it would be for his friends/family from Brazil to get here. Which brought me to start considering Florida, specifically the keys or miami, but venues and vendors are hella expensive there!! I don’t know exactly how many of his people would actually travel here but part of me feels guilty to make them travel all this way to go to a less touristy, more country kind of locale. I keep thinking they would have more fun or be more inclined to come if our wedding was in FL due to it being a tourist spot, and less flying time. My fiance says I’m caring more than I should, and he says that the people who are coming will come no matter where the wedding is and that we shouldn’t sacrifice or spend more just to make a few others happy.
What do you guys think??? Where on earth would you decide to have this wedding if it were you??
Thanks for any input!!
Post # 2
This situation is going to be a no win. Either you have it in the US, and some of his family will miss out, or you hold it in Brazil, and some of your family will miss out, plus it will be difficult for you to arrange logistically since you live in California. I think you should go with what you’re already leaning towards – hold the wedding closer to your family, at the venue you love, which is more affordable. Hopefully his close family members will be able to attend. I also agree with your fiancé – your heart is in the right place, but you’re waaay overthinking it!
Post # 3
des- : wise words. thank you!!!
Post # 4
Agree with PP! Only thing I’d discourage is having your wedding in Brazil. Best friend’s boyfriend is currently in Brazil for a wedding, and the hurdles he had to jump through were expensive and ridiculous (flights, visas, and vaccinations :/).
Post # 5
Can you get married here, and use your honeymoon to go to Brazil and have a celebration with his family that couldn’t come? So he can see them and enjoy their happiness? Obviously invite them but for those who can’t come, make sure they know they’re important too and you’ll be going to see them because of that?
Post # 6
I would not do Mexico as a halfway point – then literally everyone has to get on a plane and go through immigration and customs for your wedding. For those who are going to have to get on a plane, I don’t think going to NC versus NYC versus CA versus other places near a metropolitan area really matters. Probably many of those places are going to require a connection anyway. From what you say, NC sounds like the best bet – you have family there already, and your friends are on the east coast. Your fiancee’s family is going to have to deal with international travel anyway so I don’t see how FL vs. NC, etc. is going to make that much of a difference. Good luck!