(Closed) where’s the effort, buddy?!

posted 7 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
131 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Yes… that use to be the case for me a year ago when I ifrst came across the boards, then I had to almost program myself to not care anymore because it was driving me insane and I would do crazy stuff like break up with him just because things weren’t going the way I expected them to go (I know… immature right?). Now I’m in a different place and whenever it happens, it happens.

Post # 4
Member
1543 posts
Bumble bee

Oh, yeah, definitely. I feel like every little thing he does or doesn’t do that kinda irritates me is only amplified by the fact that I’m still waiting. It blows. It’s been said before here on the waiting boards, (and I’m paraphrasing the quote here) but when country singers Blake Shelton and Miranda Lambert got engaged, she said it ended alot of the little squabbles and stresses in their relationship. They’d been dating for like 4 or 5 years. Even he said that she seemed happier all the time, like immediately after.

So, after that novel, don’t worry, you’re not alone, lol.

Post # 6
Member
3776 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2004

Speaking as someone who is married and has been married a while, instead of being unhappy about what he is not doing, take control of your own destiny.  I am not claiming to have all the answers but I can tell you from experience that if he is dragging his feet about marrying you, you have the right to expect change.  A lot of my friends had to let their now-husbands know in no uncertain terms that they don’t plan on waiting forever.  If he lets you leave, that will tell you all you need to know about him.  Like I said, I am not all knowing by any means but I do know what life and experience have taught me.  Best wishes

Post # 8
Member
3776 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2004

I see.  I didn’t understand that he has put a timeline in effect, ie. “the next six months”.  In that case hopefully he is planning something really special.  I am sorry if I came across kind of pessimistic.  What I don’t understand is women begging a man that doesn’t want to marry them to propose.  It sounds like your guy is in fact on board, just making you crazy with anticipation.

Post # 10
Member
3303 posts
Sugar bee

Have you started on Mr. Bee Waiting Plan? It could help so you don’t focus on getting engaged so much.

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