Which Wedding Traditions did you Skip?

posted 8 months ago in Traditions
  • poll: Which Wedding Traditions did you Skip?
    Garter Toss : (164 votes)
    18 %
    Bouquet Toss : (147 votes)
    16 %
    First dance : (32 votes)
    4 %
    Bridal Party (no bridal party, no MH/BM, more than one MH/BH, mixed genders on each side etc.) : (43 votes)
    5 %
    Guests separated onto "bride" and "groom" side : (139 votes)
    15 %
    Having a flower girl/ring bearer : (109 votes)
    12 %
    Ceremony in a church : (134 votes)
    15 %
    Feeding each other (or smashing) cake into each other's face : (95 votes)
    11 %
    Other : (38 votes)
    4 %
  • Post # 2
    Member
    2058 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: Cathedral of the Immaculate Conception/The Gallery

    We didn’t even do cake–so no cake cutting at all! We just got our gelatto and went on our way! (I never feel like watching people cut a cake is even remotely interesting, why stop the party for that?!)

    Post # 3
    Member
    923 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2015

    Almost all of them. Got married in a courthouse without my families approval while they where all on vacation. 

    I wish I could have had a church wedding with a ballgown and first dance.. 

    Post # 4
    Member
    474 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2016

    Hahaha I skipped most of them 🙂

    Post # 5
    Member
    491 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2016

    LadyNyx :  We didn’t do the following:

    – Church ceremony (DH’s family and mine are not religious so we wanted to save travel time and have both the ceremony and reception at the same venue)

    – Clergy member (a close family friend got her one-day solemnization and conducted the ceremony for us)

    – Flower girl/Ring Bearer (adults only, didn’t want children there)

    – Receiving line 

    – Cake cutting (did it privately just for photos)

    – Bouquet toss (honestly not enough single ladies for it to “matter”)

    – Garter toss (GM’s all had SO and since we weren’t doing a bouquet toss it felt unnecessary)

    – Wedding favors (we did other experience treats for our guests, wedding favors seemed trivial at that point)

    Post # 6
    Member
    6105 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: September 2012

    We skipped the bouquet and garter toss. They are probably my most hated wedding “traditions”.

    Post # 7
    Member
    4453 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2015 - Hotel Ballroom

    I am estranged from my family, so none of them were invited.

    Thus we didn’t need a ‘bride or groom’ side…

    …my MOH/BFF walked me down the aisle…

    …and we skipped the father/daughter and mother/son dance…this was also because DH’s Mom passed away years ago.

    We didn’t do the ‘cake smashing in face’ thing because my anxiety wouldn’t allow it to be honest!

    We also skipped the garter belt toss because I felt creepy about DH’s uncles, male cousins, and my now FIL diving for what was essentially a piece of my undergarments!

     

    Post # 8
    Member
    199 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: October 2016

    We skipped many of the traditions that have sexist roots – father walking bride down aisle, someone “giving the bride away,” father/daughter and mother/son dances, being introduced as Mr. and Mrs. HISFIRSTNAME OURLASTNAME (we combined last names).  We also skipped bouquet toss, garter belt, flower girl, and ring bearer, and we didn’t get married in a church or have bride/groom sides.  It’s your wedding – do what you want!

    Post # 9
    Member
    243 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: January 2017

    We skipped the bouquet toss, garter toss, and separating guests into sides.  I skipped the bouquet toss because there weren’t a lot of single women attending our wedding and I didn’t want to put pressure on the few that were there to do it.  When I went to my cousin’s wedding a few months before she got angry at me for not initially wanting to do the bouquet toss (since it’s supposed to predict who’s getting married next and I was already engaged).  I did it anyway because it’s not a big deal, but I just thought it was weird that she freaked out over making everyone do it.

    The garter toss we didn’t do because I wasn’t really comfortable with my DH reaching up my dress infront of all my friends and family.  We weren’t doing the bouquet toss anyway so there was no point.  At my cousin’s wedding the garter toss was a disaster too since none of the men even tried to catch it (she forced all of them up there).  A 5 year old ended up picking it up on the ground, put he threw it back once they told him he needed to put it on the girl who caught the bouquet (I don’t know why they expected him to do that anyway!).

    We sat guests randomly to make the sides even, since DH is from across the country and he had a few less people attending than I did.

    Post # 10
    Member
    218 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2018

    I’m bailing on a lot of traditions.
    I won’t be doing a garter toss, and probably not a bouquet toss either.
    Aside from reserved grandparent seating, there won’t be any seating requirements at the ceremony.
    While I would like to have a flower girl, my youngest female cousin will be 14, so that won’t work.
    The ceremony will be outdoors, and we’re not having a cake at all – we’re doing a tiered display full of pies! So, no cutting, no smushing, nada.
    We won’t do a receiving line, we’ll just mingle at cocktails.
    Otherwise, I won’t be walking to Here Comes the Bride, there won’t be rice or confetti, bridesmaids will have parasols instead of bouquets, probably some other stuff?

    We are going to have a few “unconventional” traditions though – things that were traditional in a long gone era, but havent been generally done in quite a while. My da is insisting on a sword arch, and we’ll be sharing a drink of mead, plus the officiant will do a blessing with water sprayed from a fir branch, and we’ll be saying our vows over an oath ring.

    Post # 11
    Member
    219 posts
    Helper bee

    I skipped all of them! Lol

    Post # 12
    Member
    958 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2015

    I’m fairly traditional and had a relatively traditional wedding, but we cut out a lot of traditions that didn’t make sense for us:

    – No garter or bouquet toss (really, why is this still a thing?)

    – I walked down the aisle alone — but I did meet my parents at the front of the church and they gave me away, although I had them use the less traditional language in which they say “She comes of her own accord, but with her parents blessing.”

    – No parent/child dances

    – We had a brunch wedding and replaced a traditional cake with mini-donuts. We did “cut” the cake, but we didn’t tell people we were doing it. It’s not interesting! Why make other people stop their conversations to watch?

    Post # 13
    Member
    331 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2017

    We re skipping them all in that list except the first dance and we have a bridal party but no best man/moh. 

    Post # 14
    Member
    94 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: March 2017

    Not married yet but we are skipping:

    First dance with father as mine has passed. Church ceremony as we arent religious. Flower girls / ring bearer as there are no kids. Garter as its just not our thing and is rarely done anymore where we live, I may do the bouquet toss as my florist gives a free bouquet as part of her package. Cake cutting – we are having a macaron tower and definitely no cake smashing, I personally couldnt think of anything worse!! Lol 

     

    Post # 15
    Member
    805 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2017

    We have a bridal party and getting married in a church but excluding everything else on your list. My ‘other’ choice was speeches. Not doing those either except the groom saying a few quick words, mainly thanks for coming etc

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