(Closed) While waiting do you feel sad when you hear about other engagements?

posted 4 years ago in Proposals
  • poll: While waiting do you feel sad when you hear about other engagements?
    Yes, it makes me feel more insecure and think about my situation even more : (43 votes)
    72 %
    No : (12 votes)
    20 %
    I am indifferent to hearing about other couples engagements : (5 votes)
    8 %
  • Post # 2
    442 posts
    Helper bee

    Brunette26:  Absolutely! And it seems that right now is the time that everyone I know is getting engaged!! I’ve honestly had enough of being at engagement celebrations having a wonderful time until I hear “Aqua59 you’ll be next!!” 2 weeks later so and so is engaged, turn up at that enagement party “oh who will be next to pop the question?” friends point at me and so on and so on. The expectations make it even worse, I have enough jealousy inside my own head without you all pointing it out to me lol ๐Ÿ™‚

    Post # 3
    11693 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2014

    Brunette26:  I had a hard time with it.  Darling Husband and I have been together longer than any of my friends and about the same length of time as our mutual friend couples (give or take 6-9 months).  We were the last to get married.  Watching all these people get engaged before us was hard for me.  I was still happy for them all, but part of me was jealous.  Thankfully, there was one of my girlfriends who was in the same boat as me and she and her (now) Darling Husband had been together almost as long as us.  She and I would often comiserate over how frustrated we were, even though we were happy for our friends, there was a little woe-is-me happening.  Amazingly, we got engaged within 10 days of each other!

    I think it’s completely normal what you’re feeling.

    Post # 4
    2025 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2016

    Brunette26:  It doesn’t make me sad per say. Typically I get catty or I laugh because at this point everyone else is looking at us like “well?”… If I didn’t laugh I’d just be mad that they get to wear their rings before me…

    Post # 5
    480 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 2016

    I’ve been waiting a year. I deep down get anxious and a bit jealous but never would show that to someone who just got engaged.That’s their moment and  my time will come and I wouldn’t want someone being a negative nancy because they haven’t gotten a ring.   I never second guess my relationship because I haven’t been proposed to.


    Post # 6
    612 posts
    Busy bee

    Brunette26:  I JUST got married so I can’t really talk, but I specifically remember getting upset (internally..) when I would hear of so and so getting engaged. I would ALWAYS say “Oh SARAH is engaged” very casually. He eventually cought on that I was getting jealous even if I would never admit it. Turns out he had the ring 3 months before he proposed and I had no clue. I would still be dropping jealous bombs and he was thinking “ugh just wait for heavens sake!” He was just waiting until he could plan the right day.

    Can I ask you why you are waiting and why he hasn’t actually proposed with the ring?

    Post # 7
    578 posts
    Busy bee

    More than anything I think it made me anxious/excited about what could possible come next for my boyfriend(s) and I.  The hopeless romantic in me got swept away at the whole idea.  When I found the one I married, everytime someone would get engaged I would say “ok our turn” lol. Not sad.  but hopeful is a better word for me.

    Post # 8
    373 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2015

    I’m already engaged, but I know what you mean. I’ve been with my FH for almost 7 years and a lot of our friends who were dating less time (and younger than us) were getting engaged. So I started to question my relationship, especially because he is my first real boyfriend. I guess it also made it worse for me because we were long distance for 9 months and for 3 summers he was gone because of internships. 

    But I started to question it because we had been together for so long and it made me feel like he wasn’t sure whether or not he would want to marry me, and I didn’t want to be with someone who didn’t know whether I was the one or not (Well to me, after 4 years I think you should have a pretty good idea!). After talking to him, he said he has known that he wanted to propose, but because we were both still in undergrad and being supported by parents, that then was not the time. so I waited two years and when he got to grad school and 2 months before I graduated,he popped the question.

    So yes, I think a little bit of jealousy is normal. Especially since you guys already have the ring and he’s torturing you by making you wait! Maybe he has something very special planned and wants to completely surprise you!  Just be patient. Once you have the ring on your finger, everything you felt before will be insignificant!

    Post # 9
    7340 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2014

    If he asked and you said yes, that’s a proposal. congrats on your engagement!

    Post # 10
    38 posts
    • Wedding: July 2016 - RattleSnake Point Golf Club

    Yes, but not because I feel insecure. I am frustrated.

    We have more important things we need to spend money on, and things I want, which will leave us better off in the future… but I still am upset sometimes that getting engaged and married seems so far in the future. Especially because my biological reality has hit me (nearing 30).

    Post # 11
    2258 posts
    Buzzing bee

    Horseradish:  +1

    I never understand this ‘I’m waiting for the official proposal’ stuff. Did he ask you to marry him? Did you say yes? Congrats! You’re engaged. Unicorns sambaing under rainbows while a solid gold dove drops the ring in your hand as glitterbombs explode behind you doesn’t make it any more official. It’s like saying you’re a little bit pregnant. There’s no such thing. You are either engaged or you’re not. 

    • This reply was modified 3 years, 10 months ago by  MrsYokiman.
    Post # 12
    619 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2016

    Hmm interesting topic, I can’t really say cause no one close got engaged before we did, or if they did they were 10 years older than us so I wasn’t really affected. Although I’m surprised to see how it affects you all, I hope my best friend ain’t feeling that way about me getting engaged :s I have a weird feeling that I’m being careful around her cause of this possibility, but maybe it’s just in my head! 

    Post # 15
    6530 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: September 2013

    Brunette26:  no, I was with Darling Husband for 8 years when he proposed and tons of people got engaged before us. I never once felt sad or “why cant that be me” bc I knew my time would come. I never gave Darling Husband a timeline, we just always knew that when the time is right it will happen. You just really have to trust and know your SO to be comfortable knowing that it wi happen. 

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